A Complicated Kindness

Tourists often come to East Village to gawk at Mennonite life, but Trudie never acknowledges their presence because she doesn’t want to acknowledge that she lives in “the world’s most non-progressive community.” One time the Queen visits, but Trudie refuses to attend the parade; instead, she watches from the roof with a bunch of teenage boys. Ray and Nomi can’t decide if she’s “crazy in a cool, fun way,” or in a more disturbing sense. Trudie hoards records, prohibited in the community, in the basement. One time Tash and her friends prank call The Mouth and pretend to be worried about the “temptation” of the secular music; a child at the time, Nomi is terrified, thinking that her sister is “so earmarked for damnation it wasn’t even funny.”

Nomi’s life is marked by so many rules and prohibitions that seem to have no grounding in logic. She remembers having a long argument with her mother about going to see a secular movie, since normally Mennonite children are only allowed to watch religious propaganda films. Trudie worries about the request—and about other Mennonites seeing her at the movie theater—all afternoon before she finally allows Nomi to go. It’s impossible to predict what is allowed (Billy Joel and wholesome game shows) and what isn’t (movies and sitcoms). Nomi isn’t allowed to watch TV shows that include magic, but Tash points out the whole Bible is like a magic trick. Trudie scolds her briefly, but she never disciplines her daughters.

Nomi spends much of her childhood worrying that Tash will go to hell. She even hides Tash’s “I’m With Jesus” t-shirt to save her from the sin of “wearing it insincerely.” Tash likes to play pranks like substituting John Lennon for Jesus during call-and-response prayers at church, and she often argues with her parents about her refusal to conform. Nomi doesn’t understand the fights, and she only cares about knowing for sure that “we were all going to live forever, together, happily, in Heaven with God.” She’s annoyed with Tash for jeopardizing the family’s chances at eternal salvation.

Nomi remembers other small facts about Trudie, like her ability to predict the weather or her unique way of folding towels. While Trudie and Ray love each other fiercely, it often seems like they have nothing to say. One time, Trudie decides to learn to ride her cousin’s motorcycle, but she accelerates too fast and falls over almost as soon as the motorcycle starts. Nomi likes to remember her flying through the air. Recently, while putting away Ray’s laundry, Nomi found Trudie’s passport in a bureau drawer. She wishes her mother had taken it with her.