A Man Called Ove
by Fredrik Backman
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Themes and Colors
Memory and Grief Theme Icon
Rules and Order Theme Icon
Love, Family, and Community Theme Icon
Principles, Fairness, and Loyalty Theme Icon
LitCharts assigns a color and icon to each theme in A Man Called Ove, which you can use to track the themes throughout the work.
Love, Family, and Community Theme Icon
Love, Family, and Community Theme Icon

Although the novel initially portrays Ove as a perpetual loner, it soon becomes apparent that Ove is a person driven by love for his family as represented by Sonja, his late wife. After her death, Ove becomes unmoored and suffers as a widower until he begins allowing others in his community to enter his life and begins to form a new family of sorts with them. In this way, the novel takes a careful look at how communities function, the consequences of loneliness, and the positive effects of community on an unhappy and lonely individual like Ove.

The novel begins by insisting that Ove is a loner and despises everyone except for his wife. Through the flashbacks that follow, however, the reader learns that this characterization of Ove is entirely false: Ove spent much of his life since meeting Sonja building a family and a community. Within the span of a year, Sonja had become pregnant, she and Ove had moved into their house and befriended their neighbors, Anita and Rune, and Ove and Sonja had gotten married. Although Ove and Rune are both quiet and stoic men, they formed a friendship to appease their pregnant wives, who quickly became best friends. This shows Ove building a family and working on a friendship of his own—and he's notably happy doing so. Rune becomes a person Ove can discuss principles and lawnmowers with, things that Sonja gets tired of hearing about.

However, disaster strikes not long after Sonja and Ove are married, when the two are involved in a bus accident that paralyzes Sonja from the waist down and causes her to miscarry. Sonja is able to recover physically and emotionally from this blow—she adjusts to life in a wheelchair and throws herself into teaching struggling students. These students become stand-ins for the biological child she never had, and her relationship with Anita remains strong in the following years. Ove, on the other hand, remains devoted to Sonja, but is never able to forgive Rune for not getting along with his own son as the years go by. Having turned his back on his friend and neighbor, Ove seems also to reject the possibility of community beyond his marriage with Sonja. Her death therefore represents the death of the only person with whom he has ever felt true love and community, and leaves him completely alone.

In the present, Ove is left entirely without a community, and the effects of his loneliness are devastating. Rather than return to the existence he had before Sonja where he was alone and reasonably satisfied with life (though not happy, per se), Ove attempts suicide so he can continue his relationship with Sonja in the afterlife. The fact that Ove's loneliness drives him to suicide for those particular reasons makes it abundantly clear that even if Ove himself won't admit it, family and community are essential to his happiness and wellbeing.

As the story unfolds, Ove is forced to accept the community on offer as his new neighbor, Parvaneh, inserts herself into Ove's life, introduces him to new faces in the community while reminding him that old friends like Rune still exist, and regularly spoils his suicide attempts. Ove accepts his new community in part because many of the people in it remind him of Sonja, or are people he knows that Sonja would like. Ove then uses the collective power of the community he builds to save Rune from being placed in an assisted living facility (and thus removed from the community).

Ove's life makes a final turn for the better when he's at his worst: after suffering a heart attack, Parvaneh lists herself as Ove's next of kin and advocates for him in the hospital as a family member would. Ove lives for another three years and acts as a grandfather to Parvaneh's three children and Jimmy and Mirsad's adopted daughter. The community that surrounds Ove at the end of his life is robust, diverse, and makes Ove's final years worth living. Essentially, the community shows Ove that life is indeed worth living when one has a community to call on for love and support.

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Love, Family, and Community Quotes in A Man Called Ove

Below you will find the important quotes in A Man Called Ove related to the theme of Love, Family, and Community.

Chapter 2 Quotes

Every morning for the almost four decades they had lived in this house, Ove had put on the coffee percolator, using exactly the same amount of coffee as on any other morning, and then drank a cup with his wife.

Related Characters: Ove, Sonja
Related Symbols: Houses
Page Number and Citation: 5
Explanation and Analysis:
Here the narrator explains Ove's morning routine, which hasn't changed despite the fact that his wife, Sonja, has been dead for six months at the start of the novel (though this crucial information isn’t yet revealed at this point). The fact that Ove hasn't changed his routine speaks to several things. First, it's indicative of Ove's fear of moving on from Sonja's death. More than anything, Ove fears forgetting her, and continuing to prepare coffee for her and check the radiators is his way of keeping her memory alive. It allows Ove to feel as though he's living with her, Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam

Because nowadays people are all thirty-one and wear too-tight trousers and no longer drink normal coffee. And don't want to take responsibility. A shed-load of men with elaborate beards, changing jobs and changing wives and changing their car makes. Just like that. Whenever they feel like it.

Related Characters: Ove, Anders
Page Number and Citation: 11
Explanation and Analysis:
On Ove's first afternoon of forced retirement, he looks out his window, watches his neighbor Anders jog, and thinks about how different his younger coworkers are. Anders is in many ways a symbol for the younger generation that Ove despises: he's divorced and has a younger girlfriend, and Ove doesn't know what his job is but assumes it's not something that he'd approve of. Ove is very uncomfortable with how the world has changed since he moved into his row house 40 years ago. Ove believes that members of the younger generation don't have the same sense of fairness and Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Expli

Chapter 5 Quotes

He was a man of black and white.
And she was color. All the color he had.

Related Characters: Ove
Related Symbols: Color (Pink)
Page Number and Citation: 37
Explanation and Analysis:
The narrator describes Ove's early life and how Sonja fit into Ove's conception of the world. The two are portrayed as exact opposites: Ove loves rules, structure, and concrete things, while Sonja loves beauty, spontaneity, and art. Throughout their relationship, Sonja encourages Ove to think outside his rigid ideas of how the world should be and embrace nuance and difference. This is how she brings color to Ove's life, and until Ove finally embraces Parvaneh's family at the end of the novel, Sonja truly is all the “color” Ove has. Ove's poor state of mind after Sonja's death suggests that Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at.

"Engines give you what you deserve," he used to explain. "If you treat them with respect they'll give you freedom; if you behave like an ass they'll take it from you."

Related Characters: Ove's Father (speaker), Ove
Page Number and Citation: 37
Explanation and Analysis:
Ove's father explains to Ove how engines either give a person joy and freedom, or take it away. Notably, what an engine gives a person is dependent on how the person treats the engine. This sets up Ove's belief that if he puts justice and fairness into everything he does, he'll get the appropriate, expected, and positive result. Ove's black-and-white view of the world isn't always particularly useful, as life isn’t fair, and people treat him very poorly even when he does treat them respectfully. Ove never acts horribly to Tom, though this doesn't stop Tom from stealing from Ove Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tem

Chapter 11 Quotes

Straight lines, even edges. People don't shovel snow that way anymore. Nowadays they just clear a way, they use snow blowers and all sorts of things. Any old method will do, scattering snow all over the place. As if that were the only thing that mattered in life: pushing one's way forward.

Related Characters: Ove
Page Number and Citation: 98
Explanation and Analysis:
Ove shovels the snow off his walkway carefully and thinks about how horribly other people accomplish the same task with snow blowers and little care. This places Ove squarely in a time that no longer exists (and perhaps never existed) and further develops his idea of rules and structure. He finds it comforting and right to shovel snow so that it's carefully and squarely done. He takes pride in doing it right because he thinks it's the right thing to do and he enjoys the task itself. He recognizes that others see shoveling snow as a means to an end Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Und

It wasn't supposed to be like this. You work and pay off the mortgage and pay taxes and do what you should. You marry. For better or for worse until death do us part, wasn't that what they agreed? Ove remembers quite clearly that it was. And she wasn't supposed to be the first to die. Wasn't it bloody well understood that it was his death they were talking about? Well, wasn't it?

Related Characters: Ove, Sonja
Page Number and Citation: 103
Explanation and Analysis:
Ove is trying to commit suicide using car exhaust, and as he sits in the smoke, he thinks about how his life hasn't turned out at all how he expected it to. As Ove thinks through each step in life, he allows the reader a glimpse into his personal beliefs about how life should be lived. It follows a very distinct structure and rules that, until Sonja died, Ove believed to be unbreakable. His beliefs about structure and how life should be lived were entirely upended when Sonja died and it became obvious that it wasn't just his death that Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum

Chapter 13 Quotes

"And you can't let the girls freeze to death tonight, Ove, right? It's quite enough that they had to watch you assault a clown, no?"

Related Characters: Parvaneh / “The Foreign Pregnant Woman” (speaker), The Seven-year-old, Ove, Nasanin, Patrick / “The Lanky One”
Page Number and Citation: 127
Explanation and Analysis:
When Ove and Parvaneh return from the hospital, Parvaneh asks Ove if he'll help her with her radiators, while looking concerned about Ove's possible suicide attempt. As she talks to Ove, Parvaneh manipulates the fact that Ove needs things to be right. It would offend Ove's sense of right and wrong to leave children freezing in their home, and Parvaneh realizes that this is the case. She doesn't understand, however, that this particular aspect of Ove's right and wrong is also linked to what he thinks Sonja will feel about it when he meets her in the afterlife. Essentially, Ove Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tem

Chapter 14 Quotes

And now she stood outside the station with his flowers pressed happily to her breast, in that red cardigan of hers, making the rest of the world look as if it were made in grayscale.

Related Characters: Ove, Sonja
Related Symbols: Color (Pink)
Page Number and Citation: 133
Explanation and Analysis:
On Ove and Sonja's first date, he brings her flowers, and even though she arrives late to their meeting point, it doesn't stop him from thinking that she's beautiful and makes the world look dark and colorless in comparison. This shows how much life Sonja brought to Ove's life—while Ove obviously noticed color in a literal sense before he met Sonja, she brought color in the form of hope, vivacity, and happiness to his life. She refused to adhere completely to his black-and-white principles and beliefs about the world, and instead encouraged him to compromise on his principles so that Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut

She wanted to get married, so Ove proposed. She wanted children, which was fine with him, said Ove. And their understanding was that children should live in row housing developments among other children.

Related Characters: Sonja, Ove
Related Symbols: Houses
Page Number and Citation: 136
Explanation and Analysis:
The narrator briefly describes the trajectory of Ove and Sonja's life after meeting each other. These particular decisions and agreements are notable in that they represent the moments in which their relationship seeks to truly follow a very classic structure, despite Sonja's love of spontaneity. Even though Sonja doesn't necessarily care that much for Ove's insistence that they follow strict rules for rules' sake, here she expresses a wish for their child to grow up in an environment that represents nothing but traditional structure. Ove's willingness to go along with Sonja's desires is indicative of his love for her, as Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae vo

Chapter 17 Quotes

As if the kitchen had been built for a child. Parvaneh stares at them the way people always do when they see it for the first time. Ove has got used to it. He rebuilt the kitchen himself after the accident. The council refused to help, of course.

Related Characters: Parvaneh / “The Foreign Pregnant Woman”, Ove, Sonja
Related Symbols: Houses
Page Number and Citation: 163
Explanation and Analysis:
When Parvaneh enters Ove's kitchen to heat water for the freezing cat, she sees that Ove's counters in the kitchen are low to accommodate a wheelchair and begins to understand that there was more to Sonja than she thought. The fact that Ove rebuilt the counters for Sonja shows again how much he loved her, and what form that love took. It took the form of action and doing things, rather than just telling her he loved her. This plays into Ove's love of structure, fairness, and his belief that men are what they do, not what they say. Using Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque e

Chapter 23 Quotes

But everywhere, sooner or later, he was stopped by men in white shirts with strict, smug expressions on their faces. And one couldn't fight them. Not only did they have the state on their side, they were the state.

Related Characters: Sonja, Ove
Related Symbols: White Shirts
Page Number and Citation: 204
Explanation and Analysis:
The narrator describes what Ove ran into when he tried to get the council, the Swedish government, and the Spanish government to help make what happened to Sonja right. He ran into the grind of bureaucracy and simply wasn't able to fight it. Though the white shirts operate under a very similar system that Ove does in regards to rules and structure, they have more power than Ove does. They can simply decide what's right and wrong or when a fight is over. Notably for Ove, when it comes to how Sonja intersects with his love of rules and structure, Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accus

Every human being needs to know what she's fighting for. That was what they said. And she fought for what was good. For the children she never had. And Ove fought for her.

Related Characters: Ove, Sonja
Page Number and Citation: 205
Explanation and Analysis:
After Sonja made Ove stop writing letters, he installed a ramp at her school so she could work and allowed her, in effect, to fight for her students. This shows one of the primary differences between Ove and Sonja. Sonja saw the benefit of a community that was large and varied; she taught thousands of students and remained entrenched in her neighborhood community until her death. She had many people to fight for and form relationships with, and as such, always had people to call on when she herself needed help. Ove, on the other hand, doesn't trust or like Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accu

Chapter 24 Quotes

When she says that last bit she points at a figure in the middle of the drawing. Everything else on the paper is drawn in black, but the figure in the middle is a veritable explosion of color. A riot of yellow and red and blue and green and orange and purple.
"You're the funniest thing she knows. That's why she always draws you in color," says Parvaneh.

Related Characters: Parvaneh / “The Foreign Pregnant Woman” (speaker), Ove, Nasanin
Related Symbols: Color (Pink)
Page Number and Citation: 212
Explanation and Analysis:
Parvaneh gives Ove a drawing that Nasanin did in which all her neighbors are drawn in black except for Ove. Nasanin's use of color mirrors the way the narrator describes Sonja. Sonja was Ove's one source of color in the world; Nasanin's drawing suggests not just that she sees the world in a similar way that Ove does, but that he's her color in the world. This shows Ove that Sonja is not the only source of color in the world and foreshadows Nasanin's role in Ove's life going forward. Nasanin plays the crucial role of giving Ove the tools Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiore

Chapter 28 Quotes

After the accident Ove bought a Saab 95 so he'd have space for Sonja's wheelchair. That same year Rune bought a Volvo 245 to have space for a stroller. Three years later Sonja got a more modern wheelchair and Ove bought a hatchback, a Saab 900. Rune bought a Volvo 265 because Anita had started talking about having another child.

Related Characters: Sonja, Anita, Ove, Rune
Related Symbols: Cars
Page Number and Citation: 245
Explanation and Analysis:
The narrator lists the cars that Ove and Rune bought over the years and their reasons for buying them as the narrator explains how Ove came to hate Rune. Prior to this, the narrator has listed some of the cars but not the reasons for their purchase. Here, the reader sees that both Ove and Rune were motivated by love and devotion to their families when they purchased specific cars: they bought cars to accommodate necessary wheelchairs and strollers, and possibly more children. The cars reflect the life and family structure of the families in question, and by purchasing these Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliqua

Rune and Anita's lad grew up and cleared out of home as soon as he got the chance. And Rune went and bought a sporty BMW, one of those cars that only has space for two people and a handbag. Because now it was only him and Anita, as he told Sonja when they met in the parking area. "And one can't drive a Volvo all of one's life," he said with an attempt at a halfhearted smile. She could hear that he was trying to swallow his tears. And that was the moment when Ove realized that a part of Rune had given up forever.

Related Characters: Rune (speaker), Ove, Sonja
Related Symbols: Cars
Page Number and Citation: 246
Explanation and Analysis:
The narrator explains the events that led to Rune's BMW purchase and Rune's emotions after the fact. Rather than buy a car that would've allowed Rune to remain faithful to his preferred car brand and to his family, he buys a car that rejects both. The car can't accommodate his son anymore; it no longer reflects the true makeup of his family. Notably, Rune isn't necessarily happy about this purchase. He purchases the BMW to try to make himself feel better about his son's departure, and it evidently doesn't work. This is part of why Ove sees the BMW as Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperio

Chapter 32 Quotes

When he almost imperceptibly takes a half step backwards into the hall...he notices, from the corner of his eye, the photo of Sonja on the wall. The red dress. The bus trip to Spain when she was pregnant. He asked her so many times to take that bloody photo down, but she refused. She said it was "a memory worth as much as any other."

Related Characters: Sonja (speaker), Ove, Mirsad / “The Young Man”, Adrian / “The Youth”
Page Number and Citation: 280
Explanation and Analysis:
Ove steps back to allow Adrian and Mirsad into his house in the middle of the night after being reminded of what Sonja would do if she were in this situation. This moment shows Ove learning to engage with memory more like Sonja did, rather than how he usually does. Sonja felt that memories were worth remembering, even if they were unhappy or uncomfortable, because they serve as a reminder that life doesn't always go as planned. Ove, on the other hand, would've liked to bury unhappy memories like this one: he spends his entire life sad that he couldn't Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolo

Chapter 33 Quotes

He thinks about how Sonja would have taken it if she'd found out. If she'd known that her best friend had not asked for her help because Sonja had "enough problems." She would have been heartbroken.

Related Characters: Ove, Sonja, Rune, Anita, Jimmy
Page Number and Citation: 287
Explanation and Analysis:
On his morning inspection, Ove learns that Anita has been fighting the council for two years to keep Rune living at home, but never told Sonja about it. In this moment, Ove remembers that nothing mattered to Sonja more than her relationships with people. When Anita decided to not allow Sonja to help or offer emotional support, Anita robbed Sonja of this thing that mattered most. It's this knowledge that spurs Ove to action and causes him to throw himself fully into helping Rune and Anita himself. It allows him to feel as though he's done something that would make Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae vo

Chapter 39 Quotes

"They can call me whatever they like. No need for you to stick your bloody nose in."
And then he puts up the drawings one by one on the fridge. The one that says "To Granddad" gets the top spot.

Related Characters: Ove (speaker), Parvaneh / “The Foreign Pregnant Woman”, Nasanin, The Seven-year-old
Page Number and Citation: 330
Explanation and Analysis:
After Ove returns from the hospital after his heart attack, he puts drawings from Nasanin and the seven-year-old up on his fridge and ignores Parvaneh's apologies that they're calling him “Granddad.” This shows, finally, Ove accepting his community and creating a chosen family within it. Though he spent his life robbed of a family consisting of more than Sonja, in his old age, Ove finally gets the opportunity to fill a grandfatherly role in someone else's life. Further, he conceptualizes this relationship as not Parvaneh's business; he sees his loyalty as being to Nasanin and the seven-year-old, not just to Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. O