Columbine

After beginning their diversion program, Eric and Dylan receive their yearbooks, and write notes to each other referencing their anger over their January arrests and swearing “godlike revenge” when “NBK” rolls around. The notes confirm, for Fuselier, that Eric’s arrest was an accelerant to murder, though not the cause. Eric defaces both Dylan’s yearbook and his own, drawing swastikas and dead bodies throughout. He writes that he could “taste the blood now.” The notes that Eric and Dylan write to each other are a “huge leap of faith,” symbolizing their trust in one another and their commitment to carrying out NBK together. Dylan writes “page after page of specific murder plans” in Eric’s yearbook—the boys are “at each other’s mercy now,” Cullen writes, due to the incriminating notes, and they know they will “both go down together [in] mutually assured destruction.”

While Dylan focuses only on describing their planned attack, Eric’s visions of murders are much more grandiose. Cullen writes that “neither addressed the discrepancy” between their desires in writing.

The boys’ behavior “shift[s] dramatically in reverse directions” once they begin their diversion program. Eric leans into attempting to charm and impress Andrea Sanchez, while Dylan consistently misses appointments, falls behind on his assigned community service, and starts failing two classes. Though Dylan had written excited notes to Eric about NBK, in reality he did not plan to go through with it—he was too mired in his own depression.

Eric earns a raise and takes on a second job, telling friends and family that he is saving up to buy a new computer—when in reality, he is planning on building an arsenal of ordnance. Dylan quits his job at Blackjack and does not find a replacement job over the summer—he does not contribute much financially to the attack at all.

As part of their diversion program, the boys are required to write letters of apology to the owner of the van. Eric’s is deeply contrite and remorseful—“he knew exactly what empathy looked like.” In his journal, “at almost the exact same time,” according to Dr. Fuselier, Eric writes an angry rant declaring that the owner of the van deserved to be “shot” for leaving his belongings “in plain sight,” citing “NATURAL SELECTION” in all caps. Eric hides his contempt from Andrea Sanchez, and brags privately about his lies to her. Eventually he complains to her about his medication, and tells her the antidepressants he’d been described aren’t doing enough. Eric’s psychiatrist switches him from Zoloft to Luvox, though Cullen says it is unclear what Eric’s aim was in complaining to his psychiatrist. Fuselier, too, says he would be “surprised” to find that Eric was being honest with, and not attempting to manipulate, his therapist.

It’s difficult for Eric to fool his father Wayne. Wayne’s last entry in his journal, in April—after the orientation meeting for the diversion program—outlines a list of Eric’s behavioral issues and restrictions to help combat them, including a curfew and apparently a loss of TV, phone, and computer privileges. Cullen writes that because the Harrises have been so reluctant to talk to anyone since the massacre, it is difficult to get anything but a murky idea of their family dynamic.

Though Dylan excitedly discusses NBK with Eric, he is “privately juggling suicide or true love.” He writes Harriet, the girl with whom he’s obsessed, a love letter, but never delivers it. Cullen wonders if he ever intended to. Dylan writes in his diary that he plans to kill himself on August 10th, and never take part in the attack at all.

Eric writes threatening and anonymous emails to Brooks Brown, and his parents once again called the cops. A deputy adds a report of the incident to Eric’s file. The Browns’ garage is defaced with a paintball gun, and they once again call the police. A deputy reports that there are “no suspects, no leads.” Meanwhile, Eric is paired with a new counselor in the diversion program, Bob Krieghauser, who writes that he is “doing well.” 

As senior year starts, Eric continues to guide Dylan toward the realization of NBK. The two boys are in a video production class together, and they make “fictional vignettes [featuring] aloof tough guys protecting misfits from hulking jocks.” The boys take storylines from Eric’s journal, and think it’s “hilarious” to have their plans “right in the open.”

Eric writes an essay for school titled “Is Murder or Breaking the Law Ever Justified?” Cullen writes that Eric “took on a provocative issue and gauged exactly how far he could run with it.” His paper argues that killing is justified in “extreme situations,” and through it Eric once again “leaks” to those around him without giving his plans away. Eric also writes papers on “The Nazi Culture,” featuring graphic images of piled dead bodies and Nazis’ torture of prisoners. His teachers do not suspect a thing, and write that his papers are “incredible.” Another essay mirrors his apology letter from diversion by describing his felony, and how remorseful he is about it. His teacher praises him. In his journal, Eric brags about his “performances” and continues to gleefully anticipate his attack on Columbine.