Future Home of the Living God

by Louise Erdrich
The protagonist and first-person narrator of the story, Cedar at birth was given up by her Native American birth mother, Mary Potts the Almost Senior, and adopted by wealthy white liberals, Alan and Sera Songmaker. It was Alan and Sera who gave Cedar, originally named Mary Potts like the rest of her female relatives, the overtly indigenous-sounding name “Cedar Hawk Songmaker.” Torn between her indigenous roots and the affluent white culture of her adoptive parents, Cedar seems to fit into neither cultural group. She mentions several times that she has disappointed her adoptive parents—she seems to run in a dangerous circle of friends, who are all “dead or in jail,” and the story centers around her presumably unexpected pregnancy (she never mentions a partner or anyone to support her through the process). Cedar seems to be ashamed of her choices and, consequently, isolates herself from her family. Although she feels negatively about the circumstances of her life, she views her pregnancy with a sort of reverence, and she is dedicated to being the best mother possible to her unborn child. This determination is what leads her to enter into contact with her previously estranged birth mother to learn about genetic diseases that may affect her child. Though Erdrich initially characterizes Cedar as misguided and unsuccessful, over the course of the story she gradually reveals Cedar’s responsibility and willingness to learn. By the end of the story, Cedar seems terrified but ready to let both families—biological and adopted—back into her life.

Cedar Hawk Songmaker Quotes in Future Home of the Living God

The Future Home of the Living God quotes below are all either spoken by Cedar Hawk Songmaker or refer to Cedar Hawk Songmaker. For each quote, you can also see the other characters and themes related to it (each theme is indicated by its own dot and icon, like this one:
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
).

Future Home of the Living God Quotes

I promise you this: I’ll be a good mother even though I’ve fucked up everything so far.

Related Characters: Cedar Hawk Songmaker (speaker)
Page Number and Citation: 462
Explanation and Analysis:

The room yawns open. I have the sensation that time has shifted, that we are in a directionless flow, as if this one room in the hospital has suddenly opened out onto the universe.

Related Characters: Cedar Hawk Songmaker (speaker)
Page Number and Citation: 464
Explanation and Analysis:

I ignore the awful prickling in my throat, the reaction to the second time she said nobody.

Related Characters: Cedar Hawk Songmaker (speaker), Mary Potts Almost Senior (“Sweetie”)
Page Number and Citation: 468
Explanation and Analysis:

Later, I am about to leave the house, but then, my childhood training takes over.

Related Characters: Cedar Hawk Songmaker (speaker), Alan Songmaker, Sera Songmaker
Page Number and Citation: 469
Explanation and Analysis:

Always, on four-lane highways, I have this peculiar sensation, as though I am going backwards and forwards at the same time. The future could be pouring into the past, and it would be like this, my car, the connecting bottleneck.

Related Characters: Cedar Hawk Songmaker (speaker)
Page Number and Citation: 469
Explanation and Analysis:

Church billboards. ENDTIME AT LAST! GET READY TO RAPTURE! In one enormous, empty field stretching to the sky a sign is planted that reads FUTURE HOME OF THE LIVING GOD.

Related Characters: Cedar Hawk Songmaker (speaker)
Page Number and Citation: 469
Explanation and Analysis:

“Just looking at Little Mary I can tell what a good mother you would be.”

Related Characters: Cedar Hawk Songmaker (speaker), Little Mary, Mary Potts Almost Senior (“Sweetie”)
Page Number and Citation: 474
Explanation and Analysis:

From the picture window of the house, I can see them in the driveway, all together now, gesturing and talking, a phantasmagoria of parents […] I am at the center of some sort of vortex. I go dizzy.

Related Characters: Cedar Hawk Songmaker (speaker), Alan Songmaker, Sera Songmaker, Mary Potts Almost Senior (“Sweetie”)
Page Number and Citation: 478
Explanation and Analysis:

I look down. At my feet there is a box of black Hefty steel sacks, no doubt placed there by Sweetie as a subtle hint. I bend over, put my pack and computer where I hope I’ll find them again, and pull the first plastic bag from the box.

Related Characters: Cedar Hawk Songmaker (speaker), Mary Potts Almost Senior (“Sweetie”), Little Mary
Related Symbols: Little Mary’s Messy Room
Page Number and Citation: 479
Explanation and Analysis:

I have accidentally tampered with and entered some huge place. I do not know what giant lives in this fast and future home.

Related Characters: Cedar Hawk Songmaker (speaker), Little Mary
Page Number and Citation: 481
Explanation and Analysis:
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Cedar Hawk Songmaker Character Timeline in Future Home of the Living God

The timeline below shows where the character Cedar Hawk Songmaker appears in Future Home of the Living God. The colored dots and icons indicate which themes are associated with that appearance.
Future Home of the Living God
Growth and Age as Nonlinear Theme Icon
The narrator walks down the hallway of a hospital in Minneapolis, en route to her ultrasound appointment.... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Non-Belonging and Forging Individual Identity Theme Icon
A nurse, who is “probably Vietnamese” but has a distinctive Minnesota accent, asks the narrator several questions about any possible inherited conditions in her family. The narrator responds that she’s... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Non-Belonging and Forging Individual Identity Theme Icon
The nurse compliments the narrator, Cedar Hawk Songmaker, on her name, asking if she got the name from her tribe. Used... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Cedar promises the nurse that she will contact her birth mother, but the question has clearly... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
The doctor then arrives, along with the technician, and begins performing the ultrasound. Cedar is both in awe and afraid of the image she sees on the screen. At... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Cedar asks again whether she has a boy or a girl, and again, no one responds.... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Non-Belonging and Forging Individual Identity Theme Icon
Growth and Age as Nonlinear Theme Icon
Rattled by the scary news, Cedar leaves the doctor’s office “wanting in the very worst way to get drunk, pop a... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Non-Belonging and Forging Individual Identity Theme Icon
In her own room, Cedar finds and briefly rereads the letter. In it, her birth mother mentions wanting to be... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Finally, Cedar has her birth mother on the line. The older voice in the background asks again... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Growth and Age as Nonlinear Theme Icon
Before Cedar can leave the house, her “childhood training takes over” and she decides to leave Alan... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Non-Belonging and Forging Individual Identity Theme Icon
Growth and Age as Nonlinear Theme Icon
When Cedar arrives at the reservation where Mary Potts Almost Senior lives, she is feeling more clear-headed.... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Non-Belonging and Forging Individual Identity Theme Icon
Growth and Age as Nonlinear Theme Icon
Once inside, Mary Potts Almost Senior yells to someone in the other room that Cedar “turned out nice." She is talking to Mary Potts the Very Senior, Cedar’s grandmother, who... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Non-Belonging and Forging Individual Identity Theme Icon
...up as she speaks, and says she felt “stupid, just plain stupid” for having given Cedar up. She also admits that she couldn’t bear hearing news about Cedar, and so after... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Non-Belonging and Forging Individual Identity Theme Icon
...Almost Senior can respond to the question about genetic diseases, her younger daughter arrives. When Cedar learns that her sister’s name is Little Mary, she asks her mother if she “has... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Non-Belonging and Forging Individual Identity Theme Icon
...and sits down silently to watch TV. Mary Potts Almost Senior, clearly feeling defensive after Cedar’s sarcastic comment, tells Cedar that she might not be the best mom in the world,... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Non-Belonging and Forging Individual Identity Theme Icon
Growth and Age as Nonlinear Theme Icon
Little Mary ignores Cedar, but Cedar observes her younger sister as she watches TV. She notes that Little Mary... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Non-Belonging and Forging Individual Identity Theme Icon
Growth and Age as Nonlinear Theme Icon
Cedar then returns to the living room and tries to speak to Little Mary. Cedar is... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Little Mary then asks Cedar to help her clean her filthy room, in a tone of voice much more modest... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
However, just as Cedar is leaving a note to Mary Potts Almost Senior, she sees a car pulling up... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Growth and Age as Nonlinear Theme Icon
When Cedar enters the room, Little Mary assumes that her older sister has resolved to help her.... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
...sisters are sorting through the huge piles of clothing on the floor, Little Mary and Cedar begin to chat. Little Mary tells her older sister that her style is called “Gothlolita.”... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
The two sisters are making progress on clearing away the mess when Little Mary asks Cedar what she’ll name her unborn child if it’s a girl. Cedar tells her little sister... (full context)
Isolation vs. Interconnectedness with Family Theme Icon
Growth and Age as Nonlinear Theme Icon
...Mary says, “Hey! You’re not going to name your baby Mary, are you?” In response, Cedar reads the label off Little Mary’s lingerie, and says, “Victoria.” Little Mary says the name... (full context)