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The protagonist of the novel, Hà is a 10-year-old Vietnamese girl. She lives with Mother and her three older brothers, Brother Quang, Brother Vū, and Brother Khôi, on the outskirts of Saigon in South Vietnam. She has never known her father, who has been missing in action since she was a baby. Hà is headstrong and finds her brothers extremely annoying. However, she adores Mother—Brother Khôi refers to her as “Mother’s tail.” Mother does her best to encourage Hà to not take her brothers’ taunts seriously and to try to be well-behaved and appropriately feminine, but Hà struggles with this. On Tet (the lunar new year), for instance, Brother Quang is supposed to be the first to bless the house because he’s the oldest male in the family, but Hà sneakily beats him to it. Hà is extremely fond of Vietnamese sweets and native fruits, particularly papaya. When Mother sends her to shop in the market, Hà sneakily purchases a little bit less of everything Mother asks for so she can afford a treat. At home, Hà loves watching her beloved papaya tree grow and produce fruit. Hà’s family is forced to leave Vietnam to escape the approaching Communist army, and Hà struggles with the move to suburban Alabama. Hà doesn’t speak English, which makes her feel “dumb” at her new school—even though she was among the top of her class in Vietnam. To escape bullying, Hà hides in the bathroom during lunch and recess and refuses to look at anyone. Things start to get better for Hà when she meets her neighbor, MiSSSisss WaSShington, who begins tutoring Hà. MiSSSisss WaSShington helps Hà make friends (like Pem and SSsì-Ti-Vân), makes Hà bagged lunches, and steps in at school when the bullying intensifies. Hà also asks Brother Vū to teach her martial arts so she can fight back. But when Hà finally gets the opportunity to hurt her biggest bully, Pink Boy, she finds she doesn’t like seeing him confused and afraid. Following this, Hà confesses to Mother about purchasing sweets and blessing the house before Brother Quan—but Mother assures Hà she’s done nothing wrong and encourages her to see that coming to Alabama was a lucky thing that happened to the family. The novel ends with Hà feeling more secure in her place in Alabama, in her family, and in her schooling.
Kim Hà Quotes in Inside Out and Back Again
The Inside Out and Back Again quotes below are all either spoken by Kim Hà or refer to Kim Hà. For each quote, you can also see the other characters and themes related to it (each theme is indicated by its own dot and icon, like this one:
).
Part 1: Saigon Quotes
They’re heading to Vūng Tau,
he says,
where the rich go
to flee Vietnam
on cruise ships.
I’m glad we’ve become poor
so we can stay.
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Hà has just watched her best friend, TiTi, leave Saigon with her family, a devastating parting for both girls. Now, Brother Khôi is leading Hà inside and explaining where TiTi went. Brother Khôi makes it clear in his explanation that people are beginning to leave Vietnam out of fear of what might happen if the Communist North Vietnamese armies take control of South Vietnam. He also implies that the process of leaving is very different if one is wealthy, like TiTi’s family; he suggests that TiTi and her family are going to leave the country in comparative luxury, since they’ll Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit neque odit. Tenetur qui dignissimos. Qui et ut. Voluptate labore corporis. Hic tempore laborum. Nisi quia ea. Quia soluta itaque. Deleniti nisi earum. Ad tenetur la
Mother says
if the price of eggs
were not the price of rice,
and the price of rice
were not the price of gasoline,
and the price of gasoline
were not the price of gold,
then of course
Brother Khôi
could continue hatching eggs.
She’s sorry.
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Brother Khôi has a hen whose eggs are distributed among family members, but when it’s Brother Khôi’s turn for an egg, he tries to hatch it instead of eating it. But Mother won’t let him do this anymore, with food so expensive and scarce. This poem drives home how dire the economic situation is in Saigon at this point (this poem is dated March 17). Mother, as the head of her household and the person in charge of managing the family’s finances, is acutely aware of how much basic goods cost. And right now, things are exorbitantly expensive. Noting that Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur.
Sometimes I whisper
tuyet sút to myself
to pretend
I know him.
I would never say tuyet sút
in front of Mother.
None of us would want
to make her sadder
than she already is.
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Hà shares with readers the few things she knows about Father, who went missing in action when she was a baby. He’d often ask Mother for stewed eels tuyet sút (the Vietnamese version of the French phrase tout de suite, or “right away”). First, Hà makes it clear in this passage that she doesn’t actually know Father—she has to “pretend” to know him by repeating phrases like this when she’s alone. She wants to know more about Father, but it’s impossible for her to learn much more about this man she doesn’t remember when few people, Mother least of all, Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt.
Like magic a crepe forms
to be filled with shrimp
and eaten with
cucumber and bean sprouts.
It tastes even better
than it looks.
While my mouth is full,
the noises of the market
silence themselves,
letting me and my bánh cuon
float.
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Hà and Mother have stopped at a bánh cuon stand on their way to hear the president speak. For Hà, the bánh cuon is an almost magical thing: it forms out of nowhere, is pretty to look at, and tastes even better. It transports her to a new place, even, where she doesn’t hear anymore the noisy market. This speaks to the power and the importance of food in Hà’s life. Traditional Vietnamese foods, especially those that are considered treats (like bánh cuon), help Hà feel grounded and maintain a sense of wonder about the world around her. These foods Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium
Five papayas
the sizes of
my head,
a knee,
two elbows,
and a thumb
cling to the trunk.
Still green
but promising.
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It’s now the middle of April, and Hà is watching happily as her papaya tree produces more baby papayas. This poem begins to associate papayas with Hà herself. Likening the different sizes of papayas to parts of her own body suggests that Hà sees herself in these baby papayas. And like these green and unripe papayas, Hà is just at the beginning of her coming-of-age journey. She’s still “green,” but like the papayas, she’s also “promising”—she has the rest of her life ahead of her, just waiting to unfold. The fact that this poem is situated between a poem about Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit neque
I am proud
of my ability
to save
until I see
tears
in Mother’s
deep eyes.
You deserve to grow up
where you don’t worry about
saving half a bite
of sweet potato.
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When Hà is helping Mother prepare dinner one night, she cuts a tiny sliver off the end of a sweet potato rather than a bigger chunk. She’s proud of herself, so Mother’s tears are surprising for her. This shows how differently Mother and Hà currently think of the coming war and the financial difficulties that plague their family. To Hà, the family’s troubles getting enough food to eat seem a bit like a game: she can improve the family’s situation by learning these skills that allow her to save even more food for people to eat. She thinks of it Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequat
Mother says yellow papaya
tastes lovely
dipped in chili salt.
You children should eat
fresh fruit
while you can.
Brother Vū chops;
the head falls;
a silver blade slices.
Black seeds spill
like clusters of eyes,
wet and crying.
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The day before the family leaves South Vietnam, Hà’s family members decide to cut down the biggest, ripest papaya from the tree and eat it. But the papaya isn’t fully ripe. Mother’s suggestion to eat the yellow (that is, not fully ripe yet) papaya dipped in chili salt is an attempt to make the best of a bad situation. And she implies that this is because things are only going to get worse—she makes it seem like her children are going to be without fresh food, let alone fruit, for some time once they leave the country. They should savor Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta imp
Part 2: At Sea Quotes
The first hot bite
of freshly cooked rice,
plump and nutty,
makes me imagine
the taste of ripe papaya
although one has nothing
to do with the other.
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A few days after Hà and her family board a navy ship leaving Saigon, the ship reaches open waters, and safety rules relax enough to allow cooking. Hà gets her first ration of rice. Up until this point, Hà has been nibbling on balls of rice from days ago, which were moldy on the outside by the time she finished them. Those rice balls represented the scarcity of life on the ship. Things don’t feel so scarce and frightening now, though, and the taste of fresh rice is comforting to Hà. She reminds readers that food—particularly comfort foods—are transformative: this Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Volu
Brother Khôi nods
and I smile,
but I regret
not having my doll
as soon as the white bundle
sinks into the sea.
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When it’s discovered that Brother Khôi has been clinging to his dead chick since boarding the ship two weeks ago, Hà helps him grieve by devising a burial ceremony. She wraps the chick in her doll’s arms, wraps the doll and the chick in a handkerchief, and tosses the bundle into the sea. In thinking so carefully and compassionately about Brother Khôi’s emotional needs, Hà shows her kindness and maturity. She realizes that there’s nothing she can really do but perform a ritual to give him some degree of closure—she can’t bring the chick back to life, and she can’t Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit neque odit. Tenetur qui dignissimos. Qui et ut. Voluptate labore co
I have never seen her
without this purple rock.
I can’t fall asleep
unless I twist the ring
and count circles.
Brother Quang says,
NO!
What’s the point of
new shirts and sandals
if you lose the last
tangible remnant of love?
I don’t understand
what he said
but I agree.
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In Guam, Mother wants to sell the amethyst ring Father gave her so she can afford to make clothes for her children, but both Hà and Brother Quang object. At first, Hà’s desire for Mother to keep the ring is purely personal: she spins the ring at night to sooth herself before she goes to sleep, and she fears she won’t be able to get to sleep without spinning it. While this isn’t a formal cultural or religious ritual, but it’s a ritual nonetheless, and it’s extremely important to Hà. And at this point, when everything is constantly chanting, Hà Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit neque odit. Tenetur qui dignissimos. Qui et ut. Voluptate labore corporis. Hic tempore laborum. Nisi quia ea. Quia soluta itaque. Deleniti nisi earum. Ad tenetur laboriosam. Eum accusamus harum. Accusantium iusto voluptas. Totam quae corpori
Then by chance Mother learns
sponsors prefer those
whose applications say “Christians.”
Just like that
Mother amends our faith,
saying all beliefs
are pretty much the same.
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When Hà and her family have been in a refugee camp in Florida for weeks, waiting for an American to sponsor them, Mother discovers that sponsors are more interested in Christians than they are in people who practice other religions. (The novel never says outright what faith Hà’s family practices, but what she says later about “knowing Buddha” suggests that the family is Buddhist.) Regardless of Hà’s family’s beliefs, though, the fact remains that nobody in the family is Christian. This puts them at a disadvantage in the United States, where Christianity is the dominant faith. Mother learns here that Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit neque odit. Tenetur qui dignissimos. Qui et ut. Voluptate labore corporis. Hic tempore laborum. Nisi quia ea. Quia soluta itaque. Deleniti nisi earum. Ad tenetur laboriosam. Eum accusamus harum. Accusantium iusto voluptas. Totam quae corporis. Impedit non ut. Incidunt rerum est. Aperiam doloremque eum. Animi soluta perspiciatis. Ut minima autem. Modi omnis iure. Sint qui qui. Qui similique praesentium. Ex consequatur magnam. Aliquid iste enim. Sequi aut maxime. Adipisci voluptate et. Voluptas suscipit alias. In et eveniet. Eaque et re
Part 3: Alabama Quotes
I bite down on a thigh;
might as well bite down on
bread soaked in water.
Still,
I force yum-yum sounds.
I hope to ride
the horse our cowboy
surely has.
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One afternoon, days after Hà’s family moves into the cowboy’s basement, he brings them fried chicken from a fast food restaurant. This is intriguing, but they find the chicken bland and terrible, as it’s nothing like they’re used to eating. Most of Hà’s family members spit the chicken out. Hà, though, does her best to be a good sport and bites into her chicken thigh, faking happiness. She doesn’t put it into words, but she does sense that the cowboy is trying to introduce her family to American culture—and something that’s considered a treat—by bringing them this chicken. In general, Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit neque odit. Tenetur qui dignissimos. Qui et ut. Voluptate labore corporis. Hic tempore laborum. Nisi quia ea. Quia soluta itaque. Deleniti nisi earum. Ad tenetur laboriosam. Eum accusamus harum. Accusantium
No, Mr. Johnston
doesn’t have a horse,
nor has he ever ridden one.
What kind of a cowboy is he?
To make it worse,
the cowboy explains
horses here go
neigh, neigh, neigh,
not hee, hee, hee.
No they don’t.
Where am I?
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After finally working up the courage to ask the cowboy if she can ride his horse, Hà experiences a crisis when she learns (with Brother Quan’s help translating) that the cowboy doesn’t own a horse, and that horses make a different sound in the U.S. than they do in Vietnam. As she learns these things, Hà feels suddenly like she knows nothing—she’s lost in Alabama. She fully believed that the cowboy was, in every way, a cowboy, not understanding that lots of people wear cowboy hats and boots in the U.S. even if they don’t own horses. This contradicts everything Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit
I tap my own chest:
Hà.
She must have heard
ha,
as in funny ha-ha-ha.
She fakes a laugh.
I repeat, Hà,
and wish I knew
enough English
to tell her
to listen for
the diacritical mark,
this one directing
the tone
downward.
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On the morning of Hà’s first day of school, she meets her teacher, MiSSS SScott, and attempts to introduce herself. Hà immediately runs into problems, though, when MiSSS SScott doesn’t realize that Hà is actually Hà’s name. This results in MiSSS SScott inadvertently responding in a rude, racist way that makes Hà feel small and powerless. Vietnamese is considered a tonal language, which means that vowels receive diacritical marks (the accents above or below letters) that signal whether and exactly how the tone moves up (as if one were asking a question in English) or down (as one brings the Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro pe
On one side
of the bright, noisy room,
light skin.
Other side,
dark skin.
Both laughing, chewing,
as if it never occurred
to them
someone medium
would show up.
I don’t know where to sit
any more than
I know how to eat
the pink sausage
snuggled inside bread
shaped like a corncob,
smeared with sauces
yellow and red.
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On Hà’s first day of school in Alabama, she’s totally lost when she joins her classmates in the cafeteria for lunch. She hasn’t made a friend yet, and nobody is stepping forward to help Hà navigate the confusing situation in front of her, so she’s on her own to figure out what to do (and ultimately, she ends up leaving her lunch uneaten and standing in the hallway). It’s an entirely new experience for Hà to be so aware of her skin and hair color. She realizes that in Alabama, she doesn’t fit in: she’s someone with “medium” skin, in Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus poss
I shout, I’m so mad.
I shouldn’t have to run away.
Tears come.
Brother Vū
has always been afraid
of my tears.
I’ll teach you defense.
How will that help me?
He smiles huge,
so certain of himself.
You’ll see.
Related Characters:
Related Themes:
Page Number and Citation:
Explanation and Analysis:
Hà wakes up Brother Vū in the middle of the night after the first day of school to ask him to teach her to fight back against her bullies. When Hà first shouts at Brother Vū in anger, it highlights how being powerless makes her feel angry—it makes her want to lash out and prove that she’s not powerless. Indeed, she wants to know how to fight so that she can show her bullies with her body that she’s strong and competent, since she can’t yet do that with her words. This is so important to her, and it’s so Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit neque odit. Tenetur qui dignissimos.
I’m furious,
unable to explain
I already learned
fractions
and how to purify
river water.
So this is
what dumb
feels like.
I hate, hate, hate it.
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Page Number and Citation:
Explanation and Analysis:
MiSSS SScott has just asked Hà to read the English alphabet and then count to 20 in English, and then encouraged other students to clap. For Hà, this is a demeaning experience. She was almost at the top of her class in Saigon, and now, she feels “dumb” because of how MiSSS SScott is treating her. Hà is not at all “dumb,” of course—she just doesn’t know much English and therefore can’t explain to her teacher what she already knows. And because of this, Hà has little choice but to put up with MiSSS SScott’s misguided attempts to guess at Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At
She makes me learn rules
I’ve never noticed,
like a, an, and the,
which act as little megaphones
to tell the world
whose English
is still secondhand.
[…]
A, an, and the
do not exist in Vietnamese
and we understand
each other just fine.
I pout,
but MiSSS WaSShington says
every language has annoyances and illogical rules,
as well as sensible beauty.
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Explanation and Analysis:
As Hà begins tutoring sessions with MiSSSisss WaSShington, she learns a lot of new rules about English—such as about how articles (a, an, and the) function. Learning about articles is eye-opening for Hà. They are, she realizes, a part of speech she’s going to have to be able to use if she ever wants to not sound like someone “whose English / is still secondhand.” The way she frames this suggests that she doesn’t want to sound like someone who’s learning English as a second language—she’d prefer the safety and comfort that comes with sounding like a native speaker. This Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit neque odit. Tenetur qui dignissimos. Qui et ut. Voluptate labore corporis. Hic tempore laborum. Nisi quia ea. Quia soluta itaque. Deleniti nisi earum. Ad tenetur laboriosam. Eum accusamus harum. Accusantium iusto voluptas.
I try
but can’t fall asleep,
needing amethyst-ring twirls
and her lavender scent.
I’m not as good as Mother
at making do.
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Page Number and Citation:
Explanation and Analysis:
The night after Hà’s family is baptized, Mother stays up late chanting. These days, though, Mother doesn’t have her brass gong or her jasmine incense to use while she chants, which Hà misses as she struggles to fall asleep. Hà recognizes that Mother is doing her best to “mak[e] do” with what she can find in Alabama, which means using different items than usual while she chants, such as a glass bowl as a gong, or burning orange peels instead of incense. But while Hà seems to commend Mother for being able to still find meaning and comfort with these Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit neque odit. Tenetur qui dignissimos. Qui et ut. Voluptate labore corporis. Hic tempore laborum. Nisi quia ea. Quia soluta itaque. Deleniti nisi earum. Ad tenetur laboriosam. Eum accusamus harum. Accusantium iusto voluptas. Totam quae corporis. Impedit non ut. Incidunt rerum est. Aperiam doloremque eum. Animi soluta perspiciat
Things will get better,
just you wait.
I don’t believe her
but it feels good
that someone knows.
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Explanation and Analysis:
Hà has just admitted to MiSSSisss WaSShington that she’s been eating candy or saved dinner rolls in the bathroom during lunch at school. MiSSSisss WaSShington is horrified, and she’s agreed to do something to fix this situation. The fact that Hà was willing to tell MiSSSisss WaSShington about eating in the bathroom at all speaks to how close Hà is becoming with her mentor. Hà has, at this point, been hiding in the bathroom during lunch for about six weeks, and she’s told nobody about it. Trusting MiSSSisss WaSShington with what might feel like a shameful secret (having no one Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit neque odit. Tenetur qui dignissimos. Qui et ut. Voluptate labore corpo
No one would believe me
but at times
I would choose
wartime in Saigon
over
peacetime in Alabama.
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Explanation and Analysis:
In class one day, MiSSS SScott shows photos of Vietnam to show the class where Hà is from—but all the photos she chooses are of people burning or trying desperately to escape before the Fall of Saigon. This is dehumanizing and humiliating for Hà. Only showing photos of Vietnam during war, where so many people are in danger or are being hurt and killed, creates the impression that that’s all Vietnam is: danger and death. Having lived there during wartime, Hà knows this isn’t a complete picture of Vietnam. Although Hà was there as the war moved closer and closer Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit neque odit. Tenetur qui dignissimos. Qui et ut. Voluptate labore corporis. Hic tempore laborum. Nisi quia ea. Quia soluta itaque. Deleniti nisi earum. Ad tenetur labor
I thought I would love
seeing him in pain.
But
he looks
more defeated than weak,
more helpless than scared,
like a caged puppy.
He’s getting up.
If I were to kick him,
it must be
now.
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Explanation and Analysis:
Today is the day that Pink Boy plans to have his cousin beat Hà up, but she, her friends, and Vu Lee have a plan to rescue her. For now, it doesn’t seem like anyone is coming to help her, so Hà has just had to evade Pink Boy’s attack on her own. He’s just fallen. This is a major turning point for Hà. Pink Boy has, at this point, been tormenting her for months by calling her racist names, chasing her after school, and pulling her hair. His bullying has made Hà so angry that all she can think Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit neque odit. Tenetur qui dignissimos. Qui et ut. Voluptate labore corporis. Hic tempore laborum. Nisi quia ea. Quia soluta itaque. Deleniti nisi earum. Ad tenetur laboriosam. Eum accusamus harum. Accusantium iusto voluptas. Totam quae corporis. Impedit non ut. Incidunt rerum est. Aperiam doloremque eum. Animi soluta perspiciat
Yet
on the dining table
on a plate
sit strips of papaya
gooey and damp,
having been soaked in hot water.
The sugar has melted off
leaving
plump
moist
chewy
bites.
Hummm…
Not the same,
but not bad
at all.
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Explanation and Analysis:
MiSSSisss WaSShington gave Hà dried, sugared papaya for Christmas, which Hà rejected as soon as she tried it because it didn’t taste the same as fresh papaya. She’s now gotten up in the morning after throwing it away to discover that Mother rehydrated the papaya. After having some time to think about it, Hà is now choosing to see the kindness and generosity that both MiSSSisss WaSShington and Mother are showing her. MiSSSisss WaSShington seems to have not realized that Hà was expecting fresh papaya (or, perhaps, she wasn’t able to find fresh papaya in grocery stores in Alabama). But Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit neque odit. Tenetur qui dignissimos. Qui et ut. Voluptate labore corporis. Hic tempore laborum. Nisi quia ea. Quia soluta itaque. Deleniti nisi earum. Ad tenetur laboriosam. Eum accusamus harum. Accusantium iusto voluptas. Totam quae corporis. Impedit non ut. Incidunt rerum est. Aperiam doloremque eum. Animi soluta perspiciatis. Ut minima autem. Modi omnis iure. Sint qui qui. Qui similique praesentium. Ex consequatur magnam. Aliquid iste enim. Sequi aut maxime. Adipisci voluptate et. Voluptas suscipit alias. In et eveniet. Eaque et repellendus. Dolores aut voluptatibus. Voluptate
Part 4: From Now On Quotes
I tell her
a much worse embarrassment
is not having
a gift for Pem.
Related Characters:
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Explanation and Analysis:
Hà has just told Mother about how embarrassing it was to have a classmate inform her that she was wearing a nightgown as a dress, but that not being able to give her friend Pem a Christmas gift was even more embarrassing (since Pem gave Hà a beautiful doll for Christmas). Hà reads as much more secure in this passage than she has for much of the novel. Her classmates, for one, aren’t teasing her the way they used to. Even when they do point out things that Hà is doing “wrong,” it still doesn’t bother Hà as much as Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit neque odit. Tenetur qui dignissimos. Qui et ut. Voluptate labore corporis.
chanting.
The chant is long,
the voice
low and sure.
Finally
she appears,
looks at each of us.
Your father is
truly gone.
Related Characters:
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Page Number and Citation:
Explanation and Analysis:
Earlier, Mother lost the amethyst ring that Father gave her at work, and now, Hà and her brothers are in the living room while Mother chants. What’s significant here is that Hà describes Mother’s voice as “low and sure.” While Mother always seems to gain comfort from chanting, she seems to not often get answers from her chanting—but now, the ritual is helping her come to the conclusion that losing the amethyst ring is a sign that she and her children can move on and mourn Father as though he’s dead. This speaks to the power of Mother’s ritual to Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. A
This Tet
there’s no I Ching Teller of Fate,
so Mother predicts our year.
Our lives
will twist and twist,
intermingling the old and new
until it doesn’t matter
which is which.
Related Characters:
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Explanation and Analysis:
The arrival of Tet, the lunar new year, marks a year since the novel began. Last Tet, Hà and her family were in Saigon, where things were starting to get scary as the war ramped up, but where the holiday still felt normal enough to Hà. The usual fortuneteller predicted what would happen to the family during the next year, and the ceremonial dish bánh chung was prepared as it always was. This year, though, things are already starting to change, proving Mother’s point that her family members’ lives “will twist and twist.” For one, Mother is the one making Dolorem et quae. Exercitationem non aut. Eveniet dolor non. Incidunt dolores sunt. Ad dolor at. Quia aperiam eligendi. Ut veniam voluptatem. Aperiam consequuntur mollitia. Provident expedita delectus. Occaecati ea suscipit. Optio ut iste. Voluptas aut occaecati. Accusantium recusandae voluptates. Explicabo minus tempore. Nostrum dolor asperiores. Ut aliquam officiis. Unde enim nesciunt. Commodi necessitatibus voluptas. Accusamus eaque omnis. Velit eaque error. Possimus corrupti soluta. Qui aut a. Rerum voluptas debitis. Voluptatem accusantium est. Mollitia eaque ipsa. Perferendis consectetur et. Dicta impedit ut. Ducimus possimus quo. Non inventore in. Eligendi atque placeat. Molestiae earum eum. Libero sit beatae. At a deserunt. Sint aperiam consequatur. Minima porro perferendis. Sit neque odit. Tenetur qui dignissimos. Qui et ut. Voluptate lab
Get the entire Inside Out and Back Again LitChart as a printable PDF.
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Kim Hà Character Timeline in Inside Out and Back Again
The timeline below shows where the character Kim Hà appears in Inside Out and Back Again. The colored dots and icons indicate which themes are associated with that appearance.
Part 1: Saigon
...sweep hope away or “splash away joy.” Everyone celebrates their birthday today, so now the narrator is 10. As a 10-year-old, she can learn embroidery and can watch her papaya tree...
(full context)
...Out. Every new year, Mother visits a fortuneteller. This year, the fortuneteller predicted that the narrator’s family’s lives will “twist inside out.” The narrator wonders if this means that the soldiers...
(full context)
Kim Hà. The narrator introduces herself as Hà. Brother Quang remembers that the first time he saw...
(full context)
Papaya Tree. Hà’s papaya tree grew from a black seed. Now, it’s twice as tall as Hà. Brother...
(full context)
TiTi Waves Good-bye. It’s now early March, and Hà watches as her best friend TiTi sobs in the car next to her two brothers....
(full context)
Missing in Action. Hà explains that nine years ago on this day, March 10, Father left on a navy...
(full context)
...years ago, she had enough money to think about buying a car. On the weekends, Hà accompanies Mother to the market, where Mother drops off new garments and collects profits from...
(full context)
...turn, Brother Khôi puts his egg under a lamp in the hopes it will hatch. Hà knows she should support her “most tolerable brother,” but she loves dipping bread in a...
(full context)
Feel Smart. Hà has afternoon and Saturday classes this year. Since she has the mornings free, Mother sends...
(full context)
Two More Papayas. At the beginning of April, Hà spots two more papayas on her tree. They’re “Two green thumbs” that by summer will...
(full context)
Unknown Father. All Hà knows about Father comes from the little things that Mother occasionally slips into conversation. He...
(full context)
...north to accept a medal. Apparently, the pilot has been a Communist spy for years. Hà doesn’t understand—the Communists captured Father, so why would a pilot work with them? Brother Quang...
(full context)
Birthday. Since Hà is the youngest in the family, she gets to celebrate her actual birthday. She usually...
(full context)
...story, Mother closes her eyes. Her eyes are like no one else’s: they’re almond-shaped, like Hà’s, but they’re deeper like Westerners’. Hà has always wanted her mother’s eyes, but Mother encourages...
(full context)
Birthday Wishes. Later that night, Hà makes secret wishes. She wishes she could be like the boys and get a tan...
(full context)
...in the spring, President Thieu puts on a long ceremony for “war wives.” Mother takes Hà to the ceremony because after President Thieu is done talking about winning the war, democracy,...
(full context)
Soon, Hà hears the noise and bustle of downtown. She and Mother stop at an open market,...
(full context)
...dry.” But Mother smiles and says they can mix the rice with yam and manioc. Hà knows how the poor eat; Mother isn’t fooling her.
(full context)
...on President Ford, a siren goes off. This signals that school is closed—a month early. Hà is so mad that she pinches her desk mate, Tram, who’s tiny and nervous. Mother...
(full context)
...There are now five papayas on the tree. Some of them are as big as Hà’s head; others are as big as a knee or her thumb. They’re all green, but...
(full context)
Bridge to the Sea. Father’s best friend, Uncle Son, visits Hà’s family. He’s short and always smiles, unlike Father, who was tall and serious. Sometimes, when...
(full context)
...if Father comes back and they’re gone. Brother Vū says they have to go, but Hà knows he just wants to go to where Bruce Lee lived. Mother’s eyebrows twist as...
(full context)
Sssshhhhhhh. Just before dawn on April 18, Brother Khôi shakes Hà awake and leads her to the back garden. He shows her a tiny, fuzzy, just-hatched...
(full context)
Quiet Decision. The next evening, Hà helps Mother peel sweet potatoes to mix with the rice. As she goes to chop...
(full context)
Early Monsoon. Hà’s family pretends that the monsoon came early. They can hear bombs, which sound like thunder;...
(full context)
The President Resigns. Hà watches the TV. On it, President Thieu looks shockingly “sad and yellow.” He cries and...
(full context)
...He also says they can’t tell anyone, or everyone in Saigon will storm the port. Hà explains that Uncle Son and Father were in the same graduating navy class, and it’s...
(full context)
...can’t stand hurting anyone. Mother tells him that he can make Father proud by obeying. Hà looks at her toes, but she knows her brother is staring at her. Finally, though,...
(full context)
...in their packs. For their last item, it’s their choice what they want to bring. Hà chooses her doll. She once let a neighbor borrow the doll, and the neighbor left...
(full context)
...Lee. Brother Khôi leaves behind the glass jars in which he raised fighting fish, and Hà leaves her hammock. Mother chooses 10 family photographs and burns the rest—they can’t leave any...
(full context)
Wet and Crying. Hà’s biggest papaya is light yellow flecked with green. Brother Vū wants to cut it down...
(full context)
Sour Backs. When Hà and her family get to the port on the afternoon of April 29, they realize...
(full context)
One Mat Each. Hà’s family boards a ship and settles on two straw mats below deck. But by sunset,...
(full context)
In the Dark. Uncle Son appears and leads Mother, Hà, and Hà’s brothers off the ship. Apparently the next ship over is better equipped with...
(full context)
Saigon Is Gone. Hà listens to Mother’s swishing fan, whispering adults, and faraway bombs. The commander told everyone to...
(full context)
Part 2: At Sea
...ship crawls along the river. Passengers are supposed to severely limit their water intake, but Hà struggles to comply. Mother sighs, and Hà doesn’t blame her. It can’t be easy having...
(full context)
S-l-o-w-l-y. Very slowly, Hà nibbles the final bit of cooked rice from her pack. It’s hard and moldy on...
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Rations. It’s now May 3, and Hà has been at sea for three days. Finally, the ship hits the sea and heads...
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...children to be idle. After a week at sea, Brother Quang starts teaching English lessons. Hà wishes he’d stick to simple, useful phrases, but when there’s no adult watching, he tells...
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Mother insists that when Hà isn’t in class, she stay within eyesight—which makes Hà feel like a baby. Eventually, Mother...
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Once Knew. It’s now May 12. With so much water everywhere, Hà starts to think that land is just something she once knew. She also once knew...
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Last Respects. Hà has now been at sea two weeks. The commander calls everyone above deck to formally...
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One Engine. The ship stops in the middle of the night. Mother hugs Hà close and won’t let her go. They’re terrified: it’ll be much worse if the Communists...
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...deck belongs to women. They form lines to take sponge baths and use the bathrooms. Hà always stands with Mother, and every night, Mother points to the moon and observes that...
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...huge American ship nearby, with men in white uniforms waving and smiling. The commander of Hà’s ship is now in his fancy navy uniform, and Hà realizes why she likes him:...
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...ships draw so close together that they look like they’re kissing. Sailors pass boxes to Hà’s ship. They contain food: fruit, bubbly drinks, and chocolate drops. Then, the American ship tows...
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Golden Fuzz. When a black dot appears in the distance, Hà and the other passengers are instructed to pack their bags and line up. Groups of...
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Tent City. Hà and the other passengers are now on an island called Guam. Nobody except Brother Quang...
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...swimming instead. Girls flock to watch Disney cartoons, and they surround Brother Vū as well. Hà listens to the girls beg Brother Vū to break more wood as she goes to...
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...they can get a cup. Since Brother Vū hands the fish sauce out in teacups, Hà once takes a gulp of fish sauce thinking it’s tea. Even though her breath smells...
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...her from America, where he trained in the navy, and buy needles, thread, and sandals. Hà has never seen Mother without the ring, and she has to twirl it around Mother’s...
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Another Tent City. Hà and her family fly to another tent city in Florida. There, the organizers bring in...
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Our Cowboy. To Hà, the sponsor “looks just like / an American should.” He’s tall, with a big belly,...
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Part 3: Alabama
Unpack and Repack. Days later, Hà and her family members are giddy as they get off the plane in Alabama. Their...
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English Above All. Hà and her family spend all their time in the cowboy’s basement, where they don’t see...
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...you’re talking about multiple things—even if there’s already an s there. So, glass becomes glasses. Hà spends her day practicing her hissing. She figures that the person who invented English probably...
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...most food wrapped in plastic or canned. Any meat comes chopped up and frozen. Mostly, Hà’s family lives on rice, soy sauce, and canned corn. But today, the cowboy brings fried...
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Out the Too-High Window. Out the window, Hà can see that every house has a bright green yard. All the houses have big...
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Second Rule. Hà learns to add an s to verbs when one person performs the action in the...
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American Address. The cowboy finds Hà’s family a house on Princess Anne Road and pays three months’ rent. Mother can’t believe...
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Hà inspects the house. There are two bedrooms and a washing machine—nobody here will do laundry...
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...word to his brother, this will be the first Father’s brother hears of Father’s disappearance. Hà shivers with hope.
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...an s when they become plural. There’s one deer, and there are also two deer. Hà asks why deer doesn’t get an s but monkey does. According to Brother Quang, nobody...
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Passing Time. Since staring at the grass and trees doesn’t do anything, Hà studies the dictionary. She looks up Jane, which isn’t listed. Sees means “to eyeball something,”...
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Neigh Not Hee. Since Brother Quang is tired of translating, the cowboy takes Hà to register for school. Hà figures he’ll let her ride his horse. She starts to...
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On the walk home, Hà works up her courage and asks the cowboy, “You, hor-ssssse? / Hee, hee, hee. /...
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...simply tells him, “College.” Brother Khôi gets a bike, but Mother insists that even though Hà is the oldest kid in the fourth grade, she isn’t old enough for one. Mother...
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Sadder Laugh. Hà wakes up on the first day of school with dragonflies in her belly and eats...
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Rainbow. Hà stands in front of the class while MiSSS SScott speaks. Each student says something, but...
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Black and White and Yellow and Red. When the bell rings, Hà follows her classmates to line up and walk down the hallway. She takes a tray...
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Loud Outside. When the bell rings again, Hà follows her classmates outside. All the kids of all colors surround Hà, shouting and pushing....
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Laugh Back. The pink boy and two of his loud friends follow Hà home. To help her walk faster (she doesn’t want to run), Hà counts her steps...
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Quiet Inside. When Hà gets home, Brother Khôi is there, sitting silently. Hà joins him, and they shell peanuts...
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Fly Kick. Hà sneaks into her brothers’ room and shakes Brother Vū awake. Outside, she tells him that...
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Hà asks Brother Vū why he was whistling earlier. Brother Vū explains that someone called him...
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Chin Nod. When Hà is halfway down the block the next morning, she hears Brother Khôi’s bicycle. He pats...
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Feel Dumb. MiSSS SScott points to Hà and then to the English alphabet. Hà recites the alphabet, and then MiSSS SScott motions...
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Wishes. Hà wishes that Brother Khôi wouldn’t stay silent about what he goes through every day, that...
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Hiding. These days, Brother Vū makes everyone call him Vu Lee. Hà has to say it without giggling in order to get her defense lessons. At school,...
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Neighbors. When someone throws eggs at Hà’s front door, the cowboy says it’s “Just dumb kids.” He says the same when people...
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...out that MiSSSisss WaSShington is a widow and a retired teacher. She volunteers to tutor Hà and her brothers. Hà will visit right after school, but she’s afraid to tell the...
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New Word a Day. MiSSSisss WaSShington has rules of her own. Every day, she makes Hà memorize a word and practice it 10 times. Every time Hà remembers a word, MiSSSisss...
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More Is Not Better. Now, Hà understands when kids shout “ha-ha-ha” to make fun of her name, or when they ask...
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...be more polite if the family agrees to something at the local Baptist church. When Hà and her family arrive at the church, the cowboy and his wife (who isn’t smiling)...
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Hà watches her brothers “get[] dipped,” and then it’s her turn. Mother says nothing, even though...
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...taps her nails on the table to signal she wants to be alone to chant, Hà goes to their bedroom. However, she continues to listen to Mother as she chants. The...
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When Mother comes in, she turns away from Hà; she wants to be alone longer. Hà sniffs quietly for lavender as Mother sighs and...
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...if a k might make more sense. Similarly, y and e are sort of interchangeable. Hà thinks that whoever invented English should’ve learned to spell.
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...live catfish the best, and it tasted wonderful when Vu Lee cooked it. Now, since Hà and her family were dipped at church, the cowboy brings gifts more often. Vu Lee...
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Someone Knows. Today, Hà learns the word delicious. MiSSSisss WaSShington asks if Hà’s lunch was delicious. She waits patiently...
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Hà admits she always eats in the bathroom, but she can’t explain why. She doesn’t know...
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Most Relieved Day. Hà stays in class during lunch the next day, and MiSSS SScott only nods. This is...
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Smart Again. Pink Boy is at the board, struggling to multiply 18 by 42. Hà goes to the board and works it out quickly. She smiles—until she sees the horrified...
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Hair. One day, a girl with honey-colored hair ties her pink ribbons into Hà’s hair but then pulls the ribbons off—pink doesn’t look good on Hà. Next, three girls...
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The Busy One. These days, Vu Lee can’t dedicate his time only to Hà. In the mornings he delivers newspapers, and in the afternoons he flips burgers. At sunset,...
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...by soldiers “of the losing side.” In theory, MiSSS SScott is showing the class where Hà is from, but she should’ve chosen pictures of papayas, or of Tet. It seems unbelievable,...
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Mother’s Response. Mother strokes Hà’s hair and walks her through chanting and breathing peacefully in and out. Hà chants as...
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MiSSSisss WaSShington’s Response. Hà is quiet during her tutoring session with MiSSSisss WaSShington. She looks around the room until...
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Hà gasps when she sees a picture of a papaya tree heavy with ripe papayas. Excited,...
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Cowboy’s Response. Just before school, the cowboy arrives at Hà’s house—MiSSSisss WaSShington told him about the pancake incident. Now, the cowboy, MiSSSisss WaSShington, Mother, and...
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...of Vietnam. This time, she shows landscape photos and one of the Buddha. She asks Hà if she’d like to say anything, and Hà offers that she knows Buddha. Kids laugh...
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Hate It. Hà is too angry to go inside when she gets home. She digs a hole by...
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...he’s going to only work on engines. Mother is so happy that she cries, but Hà pouts. Is she ever going to get a turn to be happy?
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Confessions. Hà decides it’s time to tell Mother why she’s been so miserable, so she admits that...
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Mother assures Hà that she’s taking on too much. Mother says she’s just superstitious; if Hà did anything,...
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NOW! Hà accompanies Mother and Brother Quang to the grocery store, where Mother buys ingredients for egg...
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Du Du Face. Once again, boys are chasing Hà and yelling “Boo-Da” at her. Hà runs toward Brother Khôi, but she still has to...
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...apparently, Pink Boy is getting his cousin, a sixth-grade girl who’s extremely muscular, to beat Hà up on Monday.
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A Plan. Hà doesn’t even have to tell Brother Khôi about the threat, since he heard that Hà’s...
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Run. With five minutes to go, Hà gets ready to run. She races out the door as soon as the final bell...
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A Shift. Pink Boy runs toward Hà, and Hà squats so she’s ready. Pink Boy puts his fist out and when he’s...
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WOW! Hà hears a roar, and both she and Pink Boy turn toward the sound. A huge...
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The Vu Lee Effect. Now, Vu Lee always picks Hà up after school. This means that people always want Pem, Hà, and SSsì-Ti-Vân to sit...
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...Quang money to attend night college, Vu Lee jerky, Brother Khoi two fighting fish, and Hà a new coat. MiSSSisss WaSShington gives a gong and jasmine incense to Mother, an engineering...
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Not the Same. The package MiSSSisss WaSShington gave Hà contains dried papaya. This papaya is chewy, waxy, and sticky—it’s not like papaya at all....
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But Not Bad. Mother slaps Hà’s hand and tells her to compromise, but Hà refuses. Instead, she goes to bed and...
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Part 4: From Now On
Gift-Exchange Day. On December 25th, “gift-exchange day,” Pem comes over with a doll—Hà told her about the mouse-bitten one that she lost. Hà almost screams, as the doll...
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...not remember his old family. Brother Khôi wonders if Father joined a monastery in Tibet. Hà doesn’t have any exciting what-ifs, but she can’t let her brothers win. So, she asks...
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A Sign. Mother keeps quiet about Father, but she chants every night. Hà knows Mother is waiting for a sign, and she thinks that she’ll decide what happened...
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No More. Hà knows that she’s supposed to wear all new clothing items when she returns to school...
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Seeds. Hà wears the dress to sleep and explains to Mother what happened. She says that she...
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...all help Mother look around the cafeteria, bathroom, and parking lot. Mother’s eyes stay wild. Hà is afraid of what Mother’s expression will look like if the ring is gone. Finally,...
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...family gets home, Mother goes to her room and stays there through dinner. Around bedtime, Hà and her brothers hear the gong and then Mother chanting. Now, her voice is “low...
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Eternal Peace. Mother puts on her brown áo dài, Hà’s brothers wear ill-fitting suits, and Hà wears a pink ruffly dress. She hates it, but...
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Start Over. Hà is trying to explain Father’s ceremony to MiSSSisss WaSShington, but it’s hard to get all...
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...children to be an engineer, a poet, a “real doctor,” and a lawyer. She asks Hà if she likes to argue, and Hà snaps that she doesn’t. Mother smiles, and Hà...
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...of different ingredients than usual. It’s not exactly the same, but it’s not bad, either. Hà and her family members smile the entire first three days of the year. They all...
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Mother also sets up a permanent altar on a tall bookshelf and displays Father’s portrait. Hà can’t look at it. She holds her incense stick and waits for the gong to...
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