Love, Aubrey

Aubrey wakes one morning to find that it has snowed. She excitedly runs downstairs. Gram, apparently unfazed, tells Aubrey that school is cancelled. She’s cooking pancakes for breakfast, since Aubrey will need the energy: Gram predicts she’ll be playing in the snow all day. Sure enough, Aubrey is only outside for a few moments before Bridget greets her and leads her over to a great sledding hill.

Later, Gram informs Aubrey that her aunts and uncles will be coming for Christmas. Mom won’t be coming: she’ll be with Dad’s family over Christmas. Aubrey is upset. Privately, she holds out hope that Mom will show up at Gram’s.

This year, Aubrey takes unusual care to look nice for Christmas, fixing her hair and donning the fancy dress Gram got her for Christmas Eve Mass. She wants to look nice for when Mom gets here. When Uncle David and Aunt Katherine and their kids arrive—without Mom—Aubrey’s smile falters. Aubrey’s cousins Madison and Todd don’t say anything to Aubrey. They just look at her “like [she] had a disease.” Sensing Aubrey’s discomfort, Gram instructs her to set up some snacks. Aunt Melissa, Uncle Steve, and four-year-old cousin Chloe arrive next, but still no Mom. Aubrey has a flashback to an earlier Christmas at Gram’s, when Mom, Dad, and Savannah are there.

When Mom hasn’t arrived by dessert, Aubrey excuses herself and trudges upstairs to her room. She reasons that it’s still a few days before actual Christmas—surely, Mom would wait until Christmas Day, maybe Christmas Eve, to surprise her. That explains it.

On Saturday, Aubrey and her family cut down a Christmas tree. When they return, Aubrey impulsively decides to take some ornaments out to the woods and decorate two trees there. In the middle of hanging ornaments, Bridget appears, explaining that she saw Aubrey leave and decided to follow her. She presents her with a Christmas gift. Aubrey feels bad—she doesn’t have anything for Bridget yet. Bridget doesn’t mind. After a pause, she asks if Aubrey is okay—Bridget’s mom thought Christmas might be difficult for Aubrey. Thinking about that made Bridget herself sad. Aubrey starts to tell Bridget, “You can go ahead and be happy. I’m going to be happy, when…” but she can’t bring herself to finish. She knows wishes don’t come true if you tell people about them.

On Christmas Eve, Aubrey and her family attend Mass. Aubrey hopes that Mom will be at Gram’s when they return, but they return to an empty house. She holds out hope that Mom will be there tomorrow. Gram wakes Aubrey on Christmas morning, and Aubrey is initially excited. But when she runs downstairs to greet Mom, she finds that it’s only her aunts, uncles, and cousins there. She goes through the day’s festivities in a daze. Uncle David sympathizes with her. “Christmas can be tiring,” he notes. Aubrey falls asleep on the couch.

Aunt Katherine wakes Aubrey later that afternoon and urges her to eat something, but Aubrey says she’s not hungry. At last, Gram hands Aubrey a piece of paper with a phone number written on it. “There. Call her,” Gram instructs. She knows Aubrey wants to talk to Mom. Aubrey refuses. “That’s not how it’s supposed to be!” she shouts. She shouldn’t have to call Mom—Mom should have called her. Gram calmly says that they’re giving Mom “time and space.” Mom will call when she’s ready—and if Aubrey is ready to call Mom herself, then she should do that. “I hate her,” Aubrey says, storming off.