Milkman

Following the narrator’s second encounter with the milkman, she starts taking a different bus route and quits running for a week. When she does decide to start running again, she plans to bring third brother-in-law with her. The narrator likes third brother-in-law. They grew up together, and he is a well-respected member of the community. The men respect him because he can fight, and the women respect him because he puts femininity on a pedestal. The narrator thinks bringing third brother-in-law with her will ensure the milkman does not bother her. If he tried, he would become a pariah in the community because third brother-in-law is so well liked.

On the day of their first scheduled run together, the narrator makes her way to third brother-in-law’s house. There, she finds him warming up outside. They discuss how long they plan to run, and third brother-in-law gives distances that he knows would typically be out of the narrator’s comfort zone. However, the narrator does not put up much of a fight because she is just happy to not have to worry about the milkman.

As the narrator and third brother-in-law are about to depart, third sister comes outside with an alcoholic drink in her hand. Third sister mocks them for running, as do her five friends who show up moments later. It is a ritual that the narrator and third brother-in-law are used to. On her run, the narrator thinks about maybe-boyfriend and his latest used car project.

Last Tuesday, the narrator went to see maybe-boyfriend. Maybe-boyfriend was overjoyed because he recently acquired a supercharger that is worth a lot of money, which he got for a steal. The narrator does not know much about cars, but she appreciates maybe-boyfriend’s enthusiasm and patiently listens to him talk about them. On the Tuesday in question, all of maybe-boyfriend’s male neighbors come over to admire the supercharger and talk cars together. Everything goes swimmingly for maybe-boyfriend until one of his neighbor’s mentions that the supercharger came from a British race car, which likely would have had a British flag painted on it.

The narrator meditates on the current state of Northern Ireland, where everything is a political act. Even what someone decides to name their child could be considered political, and there is a list of banned names. Flags, in particular, are important political symbols that get people riled up, though as one of maybe-boyfriend’s friends points out, there is no flag on the supercharger itself.

However, the angry neighbor does not care and goes on a long rant about how the British have a long history of oppressing Ireland. He believes it is wrong that maybe-boyfriend would put his love of cars over his love of country. He even implies that bringing the supercharger inside and admiring it is a traitorous act. Additionally, there is a hint of a threat in the angry neighbor’s rant, as he suggests that he may tell the renouncers in the neighborhood about what maybe-boyfriend has done.

Maybe-boyfriend, who tries to stay out of politics, does not respond to the angry neighbor. However, one of maybe-boyfriend’s friends quickly gets fed up with the angry neighbor and punches him in the face. The angry neighbor leaves, but not before warning the group that there will be consequences for their actions. As the angry neighbor departs, chef, maybe-boyfriend’s best friend, enters the home. Chef likes to cook, though many people mock his hobby and infer that he is gay. Because of how he is treated, chef gets into a lot of fights. When chef walks into maybe-boyfriend’s home and sees how many people are inside, he immediately declares that he will not cook for everyone. Luckily, most of maybe-boyfriend’s neighbors are looking for a way to take their leave anyway, so the house quickly empties out.

Chef starts cooking while maybe-boyfriend and his friends move the supercharger. Meanwhile, the narrator thinks about maybe-boyfriend’s recent suggestion that they move in together. The narrator is unsure because their relationship status is already strange, and she does not want to leave her mother alone to raise her younger sisters. Additionally, maybe-boyfriend lives in a neighborhood where people would negatively judge a couple who lived together before marrying. Previously, when the narrator brought up this last concern to maybe-boyfriend, he suggested they move into an apartment on the red-light street, where lots of unmarried couples live together.

Ultimately, the narrator decides to reject maybe-boyfriend’s offer to move in together. She realizes now that she has conflicting thoughts about maybe boyfriend. On the one hand, she wants to be closer to him and does not like that he does not take their relationship as seriously as she does. However, whenever he tries to take the relationship more seriously, she rejects him. Secretly, she worries that maybe-boyfriend is not manly enough for her. Like chef, maybe-boyfriend enjoys cooking and does not like football. Still, the narrator likes having sex with maybe-boyfriend and always spends time with him when she gets the chance. In fact, the evening she goes running with third brother-in-law, she and maybe-boyfriend plan to watch the sunset together.

Thinking about maybe-boyfriend leads the narrator to contemplate a recent conversation she had with her mother. The narrator’s mother is constantly worried about when the narrator will get married—a fear she shares with all the women in the neighborhood. In particular, the narrator’s mother wants to make sure she marries someone from the right religion. The narrator’s second sister married an English man and had to move overseas because she was no longer accepted in the community. Later, second sister’s husband died from an illness unrelated to the Troubles, but she still is not allowed to return home.

Recently, the narrator’s mother wanted to talk with her because she heard from the broader community that the narrator is romantically involved with the milkman. She expressed her disapproval to the narrator because the milkman is already married, and he is paramilitary. The narrator’s mother also mentioned that the milkman’s job is to work reconnaissance. The narrator told her mother that she is not involved with the milkman and details both of their interactions. However, her mother did not believe her and asked her to consider what her father would say.

Remembering her mother’s provocation leads the narrator to thinking about the last thing she heard her father, who is now dead, say. On his deathbed, the narrator’s father, who was not in his right mind, told her and her two youngest sisters that an unidentified man sexually abused him repeatedly as a child. This revelation deeply disturbs the narrator, though her three younger sisters (who she refers to collectively as “wee sisters”) are too little to understand what their father is saying. In this flashback, the narrator also provides herself with a name akin to the ones she given the rest of her family: middle sister.  

Middle sister brings her thoughts back to the present, where she is running with third brother-in-law. She is happy that she does not see the milkman anywhere, though she knows he could be hiding and watching her. After all, his job is reconnaissance, and he seems to know her schedule. While running, third brother-in-law asks middle sister if they can have a chat. His request sets off alarm bells in middle sister’s head, who assumes he will want to discuss the milkman, even though he is normally above such gossip.

However, third brother-in-law has a different concern. He is anxious about middle sister’s habit of reading and walking. He thinks she is making herself vulnerable and worries that someone could attack her at any minute. Middle sister finds it ironic that third brother-in-law is worried about her because, according to her, he is completely ignorant of the current political situation.

Although middle sister tries to keep herself out of politics, they are seemingly impossible to ignore altogether, so she is reasonably informed. However, she thinks third brother-in-law has somehow managed to block them out altogether, to the point that others might think him insane if they questioned him on the matter. Yet, when middle sister brings this point up to third brother-in-law, he immediately shows himself to be much more informed than she realized. He tells her that he is not nuclear boy—a reference to a member of the neighborhood who would not stopping fretting over the Cold War, even after his brother got his head blown off as a result of the Troubles. Coincidentally, nuclear boy is also brothers with Somebody McSomebody, a boy middle sister’s mother thinks would be good for her to marry.

Although middle sister does not like third brother-in-law questioning her habit of reading while walking, she appreciates that he does not bring up the milkman. She also does not feel the need to bring it up to him because the milkman has not done anything to her physically. In a time where physical violence occurs daily, middle sister does not see how she could ask someone else to worry about her problem with the milkman—who has never laid a finger on her— because it seems so small by comparison.

Third brother-in-law’s criticism leads middle sister to reflect on why she walks and reads. She maintains it is “a vigilance not to be vigilant,” a sort of protest against—and necessary release from—the violence that occurs around her. She does not agree to stop reading while walking, but she also respects third brother-in-law and does not hold the criticism against him.

While middle sister and third brother-in-law are running, middle sister hears someone take a picture of them. She has already been secretly photographed several times since her second encounter with the milkman, and she worries that she has gotten third brother-in-law involved in something dangerous. However, third brother-in-law ignores the sound of the photograph. When middle sister asks him why he is not more concerned, third brother-in-law shrugs, says he is used to it, and suggests that they cannot do anything about it anyway. With that, middle sister drops the topic, and they return to their typical running conversation, which revolves around discussing exercise.