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Summary
Themes
and Colors
Key
LitCharts assigns a color and icon to each theme in The Browning Version, which you can use to track the themes throughout the work.
Personal Success and Failure
Love and Marriage
Emotions and Repression
Age and Change
Summary
Analysis
It’s around six p.m. on a July evening at a public school in the South of England. As the curtain goes up, the audience sees a fairly large, gloomy flat, in which live Andrew Crocker-Harris, a schoolmaster who is having to give up his job due to poor health, and his younger wife, Millie Crocker-Harris. The interior décor is “chintzy and “genteel cheerfulness.” At this point, nobody is in.
The entire play takes place in this room, adding to the sense of psychological pressure on Andrew as he faces the end of his career. The “chintzy” décor is probably Millie’s doing, and hints at her superficial civility when dealing with anyone but Andrew—whom she treats with contempt.
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The door opens and John Taplow, a sixteen-year-old pupil of fairly plain appearance, enters the room, calling for his Classics teacher, Andrew Crocker-Harris. Hearing no response, he goes over to a small box of chocolates and eats one secretively.
Rattigan uses Taplow’s cheeky theft of the chocolate to suggest that he is capable of deception, thereby leaving open the slight possibility that his later act of kindness for Andrew is insincere. Taplow has been called in on the last day of time for extra work, demonstrating Andrew’s strictness as a teacher.
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Taplow picks up a walking stick and swings it like a golf club. At this moment, Frank Hunter, one of the younger and more popular teachers at the school, comes in and instructs Taplow on how to improve his swing.
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Frank asks Taplow his name. The boy explains that he is hoping to move to Hunter’s science class next term. Taplow will find out tomorrow, he says, when the end-of-term results are announced. Though most teachers have already informed pupils of their results, he goes on, Mr. Crocker-Harris is insisting on strict protocol and won’t tell him until tomorrow. Taplow explains that he is extremely interested in science.
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Frank notices that Taplow is carrying a book, which Taplow refers to as “muck”; Frank asks, “what is this muck?” Taplow explains that it is The Agamemnon by Aeschylus, but that it’s not exactly “muck”—the plot, which centers on a wife murdering her husband and having another lover, is actually “rather good.” Taplow complains, though, that the way Mr. Crocker-Harris teaches sucks the excitement out of it.
Frank asks why Taplow is in Mr. Crocker-Harris’s apartment on the last day of school. Taplow has extra work, he explains, because he missed a day the previous week with flu. He’d rather be playing golf, he adds. Frank reasons that at least Taplow will be likely to get his “remove” to his preferred science class from Mr. Crocker-Harris for doing extra work. Taplow thinks that with any other teacher this would be the case; with “the Crock”—Mr. Crocker-Harris —he’s not so sure.
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Taplow tells Frank that he’d asked Mr. Crocker-Harris yesterday whether he had got his “remove.” Taplow then impersonates his teacher’s response, saying in a “very gentle, rather throaty voice”: “My dear Taplow, I have given you exactly what you deserve. No less; and certainly no more.”
Frank opens a newspaper and asks Taplow to do the impression again; Frank snorts, and then looks suddenly stern. Frank instructs Taplow to get on with his Aeschylus while they both wait for Mr. Crocker-Harris. Frank says that, as Mr. Crocker-Harris is ten minutes late for Taplow, perhaps the latter should “cut” and go and play golf. Taplow says he’d be far too scared of the consequences to do that; Frank expresses admiration for the intimidating “effect” that Mr. Crocker-Harris has on his pupils.
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Frank asks Taplow why the schoolboys are so scared of Mr. Crocker-Harris: “what does he do—beat you all or something?” Taplow explains that Mr. Crocker-Harris is not a “sadist,” like some of the other teachers, but is all the more fearsome because he doesn’t show any feelings: “He’s all shriveled up inside like a nut and he seems to hate people to like him.” Taplow says he doesn’t know any teacher other than him who “doesn’t like being liked.”
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Taplow confesses that he can’t help liking Mr. Crocker-Harris, “in spite of everything.” He relates a story to Frank from one his recent Classics lessons. Mr. Crocker-Harris had made a joke in a classical language, and, none of the boys having understood, nobody had laughed. Taplow had laughed, knowing the joke was meant to be funny, even though he didn’t understand it either—“out of ordinary common politeness, and feeling a bit sorry for him having made a dud joke.”
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Resuming his impression of Mr. Crocker-Harris, Taplow goes on to explain that his teacher had asked him to be “good enough” to explain the joke to the rest of the class “so that they too can share your pleasure.” Just at this moment, Millie Crocker-Harris, Andrew Crocker-Harris’ wife, enters the room; it takes a few seconds for Taplow and Frank to notice her.
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Frank and Millie greet each other. As the latter goes to put down some parcels and take off her hat, Taplow worriedly asks Frank if he thinks she heard his impression of Mr. Crocker-Harris. Frank nods. Millie comes back in and asks Taplow to take Mr. Crocker-Harris’s prescription to the chemist to be made up. She also gives him some small change to get an ice cream. Leaving the room, Taplow asks Frank in a whisper to ensure Millie doesn’t tell Andrew about his impression.
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Millie asks Frank for a cigarette and inquires whether he will be staying for dinner. She wonders why he hasn’t been to see her this week; he says he’s been too busy and that he will stay with her soon in Bradford. Millie complains that Bradford won’t be for another month yet, as Andrew doesn’t start his new job until September.
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Frank explains that he had planned to be with his family in September. Millie wants him to come in August if he can’t in September, but he objects that Andrew will still be there, before deciding he should be able to manage September. She complains that that means she won’t see him for six weeks; he says she’ll “survive that, all right.”
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Millie approaches Frank, who kisses her swiftly and nervously. He says he’s worried about the screen door, because “you can’t see people coming in.” She asks what he and Taplow had been up to before she came in—“making fun of my husband?”
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Millie says it was “very naughty” of Frank to encourage Taplow’s impression. He agrees, and complains that, having only been at the school for three years, he has “slipped” into an informal “act” with the schoolboys that he “just can’t get out of.” He wonders why it seems that teachers have to either be like him or use “the sort of petty, soulless tyranny” employed by Andrew.
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Frank asks Millie why Andrew decided to become a schoolmaster in the first place. According to Millie, Andrew had thought it was his “vocation” and that he would “make a big success of it.” She sarcastically calls his career a “fine success.” Frank says she should have tried to stop him, but she responds that she wasn’t to know. She tells him not to feel sorry for Andrew—“He’s not sorry for himself, so why should you be? It’s me you should be sorry for.”
Frank and Millie kiss again, with Frank still appearing reluctant. Millie explains what she’s been doing all day: saying her goodbyes to the other school-master’s wives. She chastises Frank for taking up another wife’s invitation to a cricket match when she had invited him herself. She says she knows he’s not in love with her, but asks if he does not “realize what torture you inflict on someone who loves you when you do a thing like that?” She says that if Frank doesn’t come to Bradford she thinks she’ll “kill herself.”
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Andrew Crocker-Harris enters, dressed in a suit and looking generally “neat” and “unruffled.” Frank and Millie quickly compose themselves. Andrew asks whether Taplow is around. Millie explains that she sent Taplow to the chemist for Andrew’s prescription. He says there was no need to do that; she could have just called the chemist and had them bring it round.
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As Andrew steps deeper into the room he notices Frank and greets him. Andrew says that he and Millie had expected Frank at the cricket match; Frank apologizes profusely. Andrew asks Frank if he would like to see the timetable for next term.
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Andrew unfurls the timetable, which is a long roll of paper “entirely covered in meticulous writing.” Frank is evidently impressed; Millie says it “bores her to death.” Frank doesn’t know what the school will do with Andrew, to which the latter replies “they’ll find somebody else, I expect.”
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Frank asks about the new job Andrew will go to; Andrew explains that it is a “crammer’s” for “backwards boys”—the work will be less arduous, and his doctor thinks it will be much better for his health. Frank offers his sympathies but Andrew says, “there is nothing whatever to be sorry for.”
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Taplow comes back to the flat, looking out of breath. He hands Andrew’s medicine to Millie. Andrew apologizes to Taplow for being late. Millie exits to the kitchen to start preparing dinner. Frank also goes to leave, in order to leave Taplow and Andrew alone. As he exits, Andrew explains that Taplow has asked to be transferred to Frank’s science class—and that “he has obtained exactly what he deserves. No less; and certainly no more.” Taplow contains an explosive laugh. Frank leaves.
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Andrew sits down at the table and invites Taplow to do the same. They both open up texts of The Agamemnon, and Andrew instructs Taplow to begin translating the ancient Greek. As Taplow does so, Andrew makes frequent interjections to correct Taplow’s mistakes.
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Andrew asks Taplow where he has read the words “bloody,” “corpse,” and “you have slain”—they are evidently not in the text itself. Taplow explains that he invented them to make it sound more exciting: “after all she did kill her husband, sir.” Andrew tells Taplow that they are meant to be practicing Greek, not “collaborating with Aeschylus.”
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Taplow, knowing he is being “greatly daring,” continues to object that his interpretation is valid as “it is a play,” and he has “translator’s license.” Andrew thinks Taplow is behaving this way because it’s the end of term but admits that The Agamemnon is “perhaps the greatest play ever written.” Taplow wonders “how many people in the form think that,” instantly frightened of what he has said. He apologizes to Andrew and asks if he should continue.
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Andrew stares at the book, motionless. He slowly raises his head and, not making eye contact with Taplow, begins talking about when he was a young man. Back then, he had attempted—“for my own pleasure”—his own translation of The Agamemnon, “a very free translation” in rhyming couplets. Taplow asks whether it was hard work; Andrew replies that it was but, that he “derived great joy from it.” The play had moved him so much that he had wanted to communicate some of that emotion to others. When he finished the translation, says Andrew, he “thought it very beautiful—almost more beautiful than the original.”
Taplow asks “was it ever published, sir?” Andrew explains that he had looked for the manuscript yesterday while packing his papers but couldn’t find it. “I fear it is lost,” he says, “like so many other things. Lost for good.” Andrew asks Taplow to continue from the previous line.
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Millie comes in, wearing an apron. She informs Andrew that the headmaster, Dr. Frobisher, is about to arrive. Taplow gets up, thinking that he ought to leave. The headmaster comes in and greets Andrew warmly; he excuses Taplow, who “dashes to the door.”
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Dr. Frobisher asks Andrew if the Gilberts have called to the flat yet. Andrew does not know who they are but is quickly informed by Dr. Frobisher that Peter Gilbert is Andrew’s successor and is coming with his wife, Mrs. Gilbert, to look over the flat, which they will take over in the new term.
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Dr. Frobisher outlines Peter Gilbert’s distinguished academic achievements at Oxford University, but says they aren’t as high as the honors Andrew attained. He says, “it’s sometimes hard to remember that you are perhaps the most brilliant classical scholar we have ever had at the school.” Realizing that could come across badly, he explains that it’s “hard to remember” because of all the other “brilliant work” Andrew does, like the school timetable.
Changing the subject, Dr. Frobisher informs Andrew that he has two “delicate matters” to discuss. The headmaster expresses how “unlucky” it is that Andrew’s health is forcing him to retire at “comparatively early an age and so short a time before you would have been eligible for a pension.”
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Andrew asks whether Dr. Frobisher’s comment confirms he will not receive any pension from the school. Dr. Frobisher says yes, but that it was the board of governors’ decision, not his. They couldn’t make an exception for Andrew, he says. Andrew halfheartedly interjects that they had made an exception in a similar case recently, for a man named Buller. Dr. Frobisher counters that Buller had retired due to an injury sustained while playing against the school, and furthermore had received five hundred signatures from pupils, former pupils, and parents in support of his case.
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Dr. Frobisher says Andrew’s case for a pension is just as deserving as Buller’s was, but “rules are rules.” Andrew acquiesces, saying that he understands. Dr. Frobisher asks after Andrew’s personal finances. Andrew informs him that he has “nothing,” but that Millie has a meagre allowance paid to her from her father’s business in Bradford. He outlines what his new salary will be at his next job. Clearly concerned, Dr. Frobisher reminds Andrew of the existence of the “School Benevolent Fund” for “hardship.”
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Andrew says that he does not deny a pension would have been “very welcome,” but sees no reason to argue with the governors’ decision. He asks Dr. Frobisher for the second “delicate matter.” Dr. Frobisher asks Andrew whether he would be willing to speak first at the end-of-term prize-giving ceremony tomorrow, rather than in the final slot that is customary for a teacher of Andrew’s seniority.
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Dr. Frobisher goes on to explain his reasons for wanting to swap the order of speakers: he wants Fletcher, a teacher whose skill at cricket has made him an immensely popular hit with the children, to be the headline speaker. The boys are bound to applaud him greatly and accordingly, believes Dr. Frobisher, this should be the climax of the ceremony. Andrew says: “Naturally, headmaster, I wouldn’t wish to provide an anti-climax.” The headmaster thanks him for his understanding on both issues.
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Millie comes in, having smartened up. She exchanges greetings with Dr. Frobisher. He compliments her appearance, asking Andrew if he knows that he has a “very attractive wife.” Millie offers him a drink, but the headmaster explains he is too busy and makes his exit. Millie sees him to the door, exchanging further pleasantries.
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With Dr. Frobisher gone, Millie comes back into the room and curtly asks Andrew: “Well? Do we get it?” After a moment’s hesitation, Andrew realizes she is asking about the pension and informs her that it has been refused. She reacts angrily; Andrew says it would have been against the rules to give it to him. Getting more furious, she says: “And what did you say? Just sat there and made a joke in Latin, I suppose?” Andrew replies that was nothing he could say in any language.
Millie asks whether Andrew expects to live on her money; with his eyes fixed firmly on The Agamemnon he objects that he will be “perfectly able” to support himself. “Doesn’t the marriage service say something about the husband supporting the wife?” she taunts him angrily. He says she is welcome to whatever money he can save—she thanks him for “precisely nothing.”
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Andrew informs Millie of Dr. Frobisher’s other “delicate matter,” to have him speak first at tomorrow’s ceremony. She is nonplussed and, in fact, already knew; Dr. Frobisher had asked her opinion a week ago. Just at this moment, there is knock on the door. Mr. Gilbert and Mrs. Gilbert enter, both around the age of twenty-two.
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Andrew explains to Millie that Peter Gilbert is his successor, who has come with Mrs. Gilbert to look around the flat ahead of moving in next term. Millie asks how long the Gilberts have been married, which Mrs. Gilbert says is not even three months yet. Millie asks Andrew “sentimentally” if he heard Mrs. Gilbert. Millie takes Mrs. Gilbert to show her around the flat; they exit the room.
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Andrew asks Gilbert if he wants to go with the others to see the flat, but Gilbert says he leaves that “sort of thing” to Mrs. Gilbert. He would rather talk to Andrew about the class he is taking over, admitting he is “petrified.” Andrew says that the boys are mostly fifteen or sixteen and “not very difficult to handle.”
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Gilbert says that Dr. Frobisher told him that Andrew “ruled them [the pupils] with a rod of iron. He called you the Himmler of the lower fifth.” Andrew is taken aback at the comparison to Himmler, hoping that Dr. Frobisher was exaggerating. Sensing Andrew is hurt, Gilbert tries to explain that Dr. Frobisher “only meant you kept the most wonderful discipline.” Andrew replies the class are “not bad boys,” though perhaps “a little wild and unfeeling;” Andrew finds the “Himmler” comment hard to let go of.
Gilbert apologizes for being tactless. Andrew explains that from the beginning of his career at the school he realized he “didn’t possess the knack of making myself liked.” He says Gilbert evidently won’t have that problem but warns that too much likeability is “as great a danger as a total lack of it.”
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Andrew goes on: “For two or three years I tried very hard to communicate to the boys some of my own joy in the great literature in the past.” He says he only succeeded one in every thousand attempts, but that “a single success can atone and more than atone for all the failures in the world.”
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Andrew explains that, when he first started teaching, he found that the boys would laugh at him. He was happy to be laughed at, and played up to it, because “you can teach more by laughter than by earnestness.” But over the years his pupils stopped laughing. Perhaps it was because of his illness, reasons Andrew, or “something deeper than that”—“not a sickness of the body, but a sickness of the soul.” He admits he knew he wasn’t liked but hadn’t realized he was also feared. He jokes that “The Himmler of the lower fifth” will be his epitaph.
Gilbert is now “deeply embarrassed and rather upset.” Andrew apologizes for burdening him and predicts that Gilbert will do well. Millie and Mrs. Gilbert come back in. Mrs. Gilbert remarks to her husband: “Just imagine, Peter. Mr. and Mrs. Crocker-Harris first met each other on a holiday in the Lake District. Isn’t that a coincidence!”
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Mrs. Gilbert starts to relate how she and Peter met, but he interrupts her, saying that the Crocker-Harrises probably have more important things to be getting on with. She jokingly turns to Millie and says, “isn’t he awful to me?” Millie replies that “men have no souls, my dear. My husband is just as bad.” Mr. and Mrs. Gilbert shape to leave, with Peter lingering behind to talk for a final moment with Andrew. Millie goes out with Mrs. Gilbert.
Andrew asks Gilbert not to tell anyone about their previous conversation. He says he does not know what came over him and apologizes for the embarrassment. Gilbert wishes him luck and exits.
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Millie comes back in, praising the good looks of the Gilberts. She says she doesn’t know why Gilbert would want to be a schoolmaster but bets that he won’t be leaving without a pension. Andrew seems quiet, causing Millie to ask if he’s going to have another one of his “attacks.” Andrew claims to be “perfectly alright.” She leaves, “indifferently” pointing out where he can find his medicine.
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Left alone, Andrew stares at The Agamemnon, pretending to read. Eventually he puts a hand over his eyes. Just then, Taplow knocks at the door and comes in timidly on Andrew’s terse invitation.
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Taplow explains that the book is Robert Browning’s verse translation of The Agamemnon: “The Browning Version.” He says, “it’s not much good” and that he’s been reading it in the gardens. Andrew clears his throat, seemingly in difficulty. He tells Taplow that he knows the translation and that, though it has its faults, Taplow will come to enjoy it if he gets used to Browning’s meter.
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Andrew gives the book back to Taplow, who quickly thrusts it back to him. “It’s for you, sir,” says Taplow. Andrew is surprised; Taplow explains that he has written an inscription in there too. Andrew opens the book to read Taplow’s words. He says Taplow shouldn’t have spent his “pocket-money this way.” Taplow insists that it wasn’t much. Andrew wipes his glasses and puts them on again.
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Taplow assumes that Andrew already has the Browning version; but Andrew informs him that, though he may have had it once, he doesn’t presently. Andrew continues to stare at Taplow’s inscription. Taplow asks if he has got one of the accents wrong on the inscription (written in Greek). Lowering the book and shaking with “some intense inner effort,” Andrew says the accent is correct. He takes off his spectacles and asks Taplow to go and pour out his medicine for him.
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Andrew sits down. As soon as Taplow leaves the room, Andrew breaks down and “sobs uncontrollably.” He tries to gather himself, but when Taplow comes back his “emotion is still very apparent.” He thanks Taplow for the medicine and gulps it down. Andrew asks Taplow to “forgive this exhibition of weakness.”
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There is a knock on the garden door. Frank Hunter comes in, apologizing for interrupting; he had thought Andrew and Taplow would have been finished by now. Andrew explains that the lesson is long over, but that Taplow came back “most kindly” to say goodbye. Frank is clearly puzzled by the evident emotion on Andrew’s face.
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Andrew tells Frank that he wants him to see the gift Taplow has given him and hands it over. He asks Frank to look at the inscription. Frank says he never learned Greek. Andrew turns to Taplow and says: “Then we’ll have to translate it for him, won’t we, Taplow?”
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Andrew recites the inscription, which is a quote from The Agamemnon itself, first in Greek and then in translation: “God from afar looks graciously upon a gentle master.” The quote, Andrew tells Frank, comes from a speech of Agamemnon’s to Clytemnestra. Frank calls it “very pleasant and very apt.” Andrew agrees that it’s “very pleasant,” but perhaps not “so very apt.” Andrew turns away from Frank and Taplow, evidently about to be overcome with emotion. Frank gestures to Taplow that Taplow should leave. Taplow says goodbye to Andrew, wishing him luck; Andrew says goodbye too, thanking Taplow. Taplow leaves.
Andrew recovers himself a little, expressing “what a fool” he’s made of himself in front of Taplow and Frank. He says he is not a “very emotional person,” but that there was something “so very touching and kindly” about Taplow’s action. He looks at the book and calls it a “very delightful thing to have”; Frank agrees.
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Millie comes in and takes a cigarette from Frank. He explains that Andrew has just received a “very nice” present from Taplow. Andrew shows her the book, explaining that Taplow bought it with his own money.
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Frank gives the translation for the inscription but gets it slightly wrong. As Andrew gently corrects him, Millie lets out a sudden laugh. She says it’s obvious Taplow is being “artful” and has only bought Andrew the gift to secure his place in the science class next term. She also tells Andrew that she walked in on Taplow doing an imitation of him for Frank earlier.
Andrew nods quietly and says only “I see.” He puts the book down and walks to the door, telling Millie he is going to his room for a moment. He departs, taking his medicine with him.
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As soon as Andrew is out of the room, Frank chastises Millie, evidently repulsed by her cold dismissal of Taplow’s gift. She says: “Why should [Andrew] be allowed his comforting little illusions? I’m not.” Frank instructs her to go and tell Andrew that what she said was a lie, but she refuses. Frank says that he will go if she doesn’t; Millie thinks Andrew won’t like Frank’s sympathy.
Frank goes to leave but comes back in to tell Millie that their relationship is “finished.” She tries to laugh it off, telling him he’s making a “mountain out of an absurd little molehill.” He retorts that “the mountain I’m making in my imagination is so frightening that I’d rather try to forget both it and the repulsive little molehill that gave it birth.” He once again affirms that they are over.
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As Frank heads to the door, Millie runs to stop him. She doesn’t understand his attitude. He tells her to go and look after Andrew, because “he’s just been about as badly hurt as a human being can be.” Millie scoffs that Andrew can’t be hurt: “He’s dead.” Frank asks why she hates Millie so much; “because he’s not a man at all,” she replies.
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Millie accuses Frank of hypocrisy for suddenly caring about Andrew when Frank has been deceiving Andrew by sleeping with his wife. He says he only deceived Frank twice, at her “urgent invitation.” She slaps him, which he says he deserves and more. She begs him for forgiveness. He tells her that he has never loved her and won’t be coming to see her in Bradford.
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Andrew comes back into the room. He hands Millie the bottle of medicine, which she holds up to the light. He says that she should know him well enough by now to know how unlikely it is he would take an overdose. Without saying anything, Millie leaves the room.
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Frank tells Andrew that he will not be staying for dinner. Andrew pours himself a sherry and offers one to Frank too; Frank refuses but quickly changes his mind. Frank admits to Andrew that Taplow was imitating him earlier and apologizes for encouraging him. But, adds Frank, Taplow also said that “he liked you very much.”
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Frank recounts what Taplow said more precisely: “He said: ‘He doesn’t seem to like people to like him—but in spite of that, I do—very much.’” So, concludes Frank, the gift was probably not a cunning ploy. Andrew picks up the book and says: “Dear me! What a lot of fuss about a little book—and not a very good little book at that.” He drops it back on the table.
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Frank implores Andrew to believe him about Taplow’s intentions. Andrew reassures Frank that he is not “particularly concerned” about his or Taplow’s views. Frank tells him to keep the book—that he may find it means something to him one day. Andrew says it will be “a perpetual reminder” of the time “the Crock blubbed” when presented with a gift by Taplow. Taplow, he says, is probably telling the story to his friends right now.
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Frank says that if Taplow “ever breathes a word of that story to anyone” he’ll “murder him.” But, says Frank, Taplow won’t—and nor will he. Frank downs his drink and says goodbye. Frank offers Andrew a parting word of advice: “Leave your wife.” Andrew asks if that is just so that Frank can “more easily carry on [his] intrigue with [Millie]?”
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Frank is amazed to learn that Andrew already knew about his affair with Millie. It was Millie herself who told him, says Andrew. Frank wonders why Andrew hasn’t done something about it: “why have you allowed me inside your home?” Why, he asks, hasn’t Andrew told the governors or “knocked” him down? Andrew says that Frank shouldn’t flatter himself that he is the first man to have an affair with Millie.
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Frank calls Millie “evil.” Andrew says that isn’t a kind word to use about someone, so he hears, that Frank has asked to marry. Frank tells Andrew he hasn’t asked her that, nor will he. He says the truth is he did what he did out of “weakness,” “ignorance,” and “crass stupidity.” He says he can’t ask Andrew to forgive him, but that truthfully the only emotion Millie ever aroused in him was “disgust”—just moments ago in her treatment of Andrew.
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Andrew jokingly calls Frank’s statement “delightfully chivalrous.” Frank again implores Andrew to leave Millie: “she’s out to kill you.” Andrew says he can’t leave her as it would “add another grave wrong” to the one he has already done: “to marry her.”
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Andrew goes into further detail about his and Millie’s marriage, telling Frank that both he and her are “interesting subjects for your microscope.” He explains that they always wanted “two kinds of love,” which he had once thought compatible but that had proved otherwise. Though he was “a brilliant classical scholar,” he goes on, he “was woefully ignorant of the facts of life.” Now the love they should have shown each other has turned to “bitter hatred.”
Andrew says his situation is not nearly as “tragic” as Frank seems to imagine: “Merely the problem of an unsatisfied wife and a henpecked husband. You’ll find it all over the world. It is usually, I believe, a subject for farce.” He tells Frank that he does not wish to “detain” him any longer. When Frank again tries to convince Andrew to leave Millie, Andrew shouts, “will you please go!”
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Frank agrees to leave, but first he wants Andrew to say goodbye to him properly. Andrew walks over to him. Frank says he isn’t trying to pity Andrew but would like to be of help. Andrew says that, if Frank thinks his kindness will make Andrew “repeat the shameful exhibition of emotion” he made to Taplow he is mistaken. His response to the gift, he says, was “a sort of reflex action of the spirit. The muscular twitching of a corpse.”
Frank tells Andrew “a corpse can be revived.” Andrew responds that he doesn’t “believe in miracles.” Frank says that he does. “Your faith would be touching, if I were capable of being touched by it,” insists Andrew. Frank puts forward the idea that he could visit Andrew at his new school, which Andrew dismisses. Frank, undeterred, figures out a date to visit Andrew. Frank says “goodbye, until then.” After some hesitation, Andrew shakes his hand and bids him farewell.
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Frank heads to the door. He tells Andrew that he is “off to have a quick word with Taplow.” Frank asks Andrew whether he can tell Taplow if Andrew has approved Taplow’s move into the science class. Despite it being “highly irregular” for Frank to give this information to Taplow, Andrew informs him that Taplow’s wish has been granted.
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Just before he leaves, Frank gets Andrew to tell him what his new address will be. Millie comes in at this moment to set the table for dinner. Hesitatingly, Andrew gives Frank the address (which is in Dorset); Frank promises to write to him in advance of his visit. Frank says goodbye to Andrew and Millie and leaves.
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After a moment’s silence, Millie laughs. She says it’s funny that Andrew has invited Frank to visit him. Andrew protests that Frank suggested the visit. Millie spitefully retorts that Frank will visit her in Bradford—not Andrew in Dorset. Andrew says the most likely scenario is that he will visit neither of them. Andrew then gives his intention to stay at the school until he leaves for Dorset, rather than himself staying in Bradford over the summer break.
Millie says indifferently that Andrew can do whatever he wants, and asks what makes him think she will join him in Dorset. She tells him not to “expect” her there. He replies that neither of them has the “right to expect anything from the other.”
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Themes
The phone rings, which Andrew picks up—it’s the headmaster, Dr. Frobisher. Andrew answers Dr. Frobisher’s questions about the timetable, before informing him that he has changed his mind about the prize-giving ceremony—he insists on speaking last, “as is my privilege.” Though the headmaster evidently tries to persuade him to change his mind, Andrew is insistent that he now sees “the matter in a different light,” and that “occasionally an anti-climax can be surprisingly effective.” He puts down the phone and tells Millie that they mustn’t let their dinner go cold.
