Kao Kalia Yang thinks about what it means to be Hmong. To her, the Hmong identity is wrapped up in being a refugee—she explains that American soldiers recruited the Hmong people during the Vietnam War, and over a third of the Hmong died. When the American soldiers left, another third of the Hmong were killed by the Laotian government. The rest, like Kao’s parents, fled into the jungle. She’s been thinking about her Hmong heritage since her family emigrated to the United States in 1987.
Shortly after the American military withdraws from Vietnam, North Vietnamese and Pathet Lao soldiers invade Hmong communities to carry out a genocide against them. Many flee into the jungle; Kao’s parents, Chue and Bee, meet in the jungle as teenage fugitives and get married soon after. Their first month of marriage is hard, and Chue (who’s living with Bee’s family) misses her mother. Chue visits her family for one day in the jungle, and it’s the last time she sees her mother alive. When Chue is three months pregnant with her and Bee’s first child, soldiers ambush the Hmong in the jungle. The women in Bee’s family—led by Bee’s mother, Youa—surrender, and the soldiers take them to a village. Chue gives birth to her first daughter Dawb there.
After several hard months in the village, the Hmong men sneak in and help the women make a daring escape. They make their way to the Mekong Delta to cross over into Thailand, trekking through monsoon rains for days. Bee can’t afford a raft, so he sells his clothes for a bamboo pole. Chue, Bee, Dawb, and Youa (who won’t abandon Bee) tie themselves to the pole and float across. They don’t think they’ll ever make it—but somehow, they do, and they approach some soldiers who lead them to a refugee camp. Bee never forgets the way the Thai people look at him like he’s less than human.
For several weeks, Thai soldiers move the family between putrid camps that stink of human excrement before assigning them to Ban Vinai Refugee Camp. Kao is born there in 1980. Many people are malnourished because they’re only fed rotten soup, and the camp perpetually smells of urine. Youa, who’s a shaman, is happy that her family is all together, and she ekes out a living performing shaman rituals for Thai soldiers’ families. Kao remembers feeling loved during this time, though she fantasizes about a life that’s not fenced in. Meanwhile, Chue has several miscarriages, and Bee’s family encourage him to take a second wife so that he can have a son—though Chue knows she will leave him if he does that.
In 1986, Kao’s family relocates to Phanat Nikhom Transition Camp, where they can take tests to emigrate to the United States. Youa is beside herself with grief and anger, because she doesn’t want her family to be separated. When Kao’s family arrive at the new camp, they’re housed in a room that used to be a bathroom. The family attends school to pass tests for emigrating to the United States. Eventually, Youa joins them, and Kao is thrilled, since she can spend her days with Youa instead of going to school. Eventually, the family gets approved to go to the United States; Youa will follow later with one of her other sons. Bee has a nightmare about dying in the United States and wandering as a lost spirit along endless highways.
The family flies to Minneapolis via Tokyo; they’re intimidated and overwhelmed by the experience, but they try to be polite and follow the rules. Kao feels proud when Bee figures out how to take her to the bathroom in the airport, and she’s confident that he can take care of her in the United States. Chue and Bee sign a piece of paper saying that they owe the government $2,400 for their flights, and they enter the United States. Upon arrival, Kao is mesmerized by how clean everything is.
The family moves into an apartment, and they scrape by on welfare while learning English and gaining the qualifications they need to find work. There are many other Hmong refugees living in Minneapolis, though hostile locals vandalize their homes. Kao and Dawb struggle at school, and get they expelled for fighting back against a bully. Eventually, they end up in a school with lots of other Hmong children. Kao longs for Youa, but Youa is in California now, and the family can’t afford to fly her to Minnesota. Kao is too shy to speak English at school, although she likes to write—the teachers worry about her progress.
When Kao is nine years old, Chue gives birth to a son, Xue, and the family is overjoyed. Youa also visits for the summer, and the family cries for hours at her arrival. In the years following, Chue has two more babies, Sheelue and Shoually, and Youa continues to visit every summer. Eventually, the family moves to a Section-8 house. It turns out that a little boy previously died in the house, and the family gets spooked when they see his ghost, so they move out.
Several years later, the growing family buys their first home: it’s dilapidated, small, and moldy, but it’s theirs. Chue and Bee work exhausting factory jobs while Kao and Dawb stay home and look after their younger siblings. Kao’s extended family holds many meetings encouraging the children to succeed in school and work, though they’re more interested in the boys’ progress. Kao finally finds her footing in school when she writes an essay about love in ninth grade about. But although Kao is starting to fit in, she develops deep anxiety. She feels torn in two—part Hmong, part American. Youa performs shaman rituals on Kao and gives her a charm bracelet, which helps.
When Kao graduates from high school, she enrolls at Carleton College. She wants to do something to help the Hmong in the future, so she decides to collect their stories and write about them. She spends all of her summer and winter breaks from college sitting with Youa, listening to her life story. Youa was orphaned at a young age and married off to an aging widower; she didn’t want to marry him, but he was very kind and loving. When her husband died, Youa had to raise her family herself. They were very poor, but her children never went hungry.
As Youa grows older and weaker, Kao tries to prepare for Youa’s death. When Youa falls ill, the family rallies to help her, but eventually she dies. The funeral is an extravagant affair with feasts lasting for several days. A funeral guide places Youa’s social security papers next to her body, saying that she’ll need them to leave the United States. The funeral guide tells Youa’s spirit to go back to the camps in Thailand and then cross the Mekong Delta into Laos using a bridge, because he knows that Youa can’t swim. He tells her to find the house where she was born, dig up the placenta from her birth (which is buried underneath), and unite with her ancestors in the clouds. After a eulogy, the whole community agrees that Youa was a true leader, and they’re happy that they can honor her death properly, unlike the Hmong who died in the war and in the refugee camps. At the burial, Kao kisses Youa goodbye and says that she will love her forever.
The epilogue flashes forward to 2007. Bee is getting old, and he has diabetes, so Kao vows to take care of him. They discuss Kao’s memoir: Bee thinks that it’s important for Hmong stories to be told. Kao wonders if the Hmong will find their dreams in the United States. She tells Youa’s spirit that they are embracing each other, even now.
