Tristram Shandy: Book 4: Chapters 26-32 Summary & Analysis

Chapter 26. Didius, Kysarcius, and Yorick argue about Yorick’s sermon. Yorick has destroyed the sermon because he believes it express his own vanity as a writer, not the word of God. Yorick catches Toby’s attention with the expression “point blank,” but before Toby can start talking about sieges, a scandalous sound erupts from across the table.

Chapter 26. “ZOUNDS!” cries Phutatorius, with a tone of amazement and pain. Because of Phutatorius’s mean-spirited disposition, the others expect he is about to harshly criticize Yorick, whom he dislikes. Phutatorius is silent, however, and the everyone speculates on why he uttered such a curse. In fact, Phutatorius was not listening to the debate at all but was instead thinking of his own parsonage. The cause of his outburst is as follows: Gastripheres had prepared roast chestnuts for dinner, one of which few through the unbuttoned fly in Phutatorius’s breeches as he ate them. Though at first the heat of the chestnut was pleasant, eventually it began to hurt. Phutatorius could not look into his breeches, however, and tried to endure until it was so painful that he cried out.

After his exclamation, Phutatorius removes the chestnut and throws it on the floor. Yorick then picks it up. Phutatorius interprets this as evidence that Yorick somehow slipped the chestnut into his breeches as a prank. Yorick once harshly criticized a treatise of Phutatorius’s about concubines, and Phutatorius believes that the chestnut was a bawdy joke in that vein. Yorick’s pride prevents him from explaining himself, and Phutatorius plans his revenge.

Chapter 28. Phutatorius, Gastripheres, Eugneius, and Yorick discuss the best ways to soothe the hot pain in Phutatorius’s genitalia, suggesting freshly printed paper. Yorick cautions Phutatorius against using his chapter on concubines, however.

Chapter 29. Didius argues that renaming the child would be allowed for Catholics, and the priests quickly become caught up in the details, debating which mistakes in Latin would invalidate the baptism. Toby interjects, pointing out that the Shandy family are Protestant and that Tristram was named against the will of his father and mother. Kysarcius argues that Mrs. Shandy’s will has nothing to do with it: he explains it has been legally established that the mother is not related to her child. Walter is intrigued, but Toby just whistles Lillabullero.

Kysarcius continues, narrating together with Triptolemus how in an inheritance case the ecclesiastical court ruled that the next of kin to a deceased son was his sister not his mother, as while the child is “blood or seed” of its parents, the parents are not “blood or seed” of the child. Didius and Yorick then join the argument, pointing out that the father is therefore also not kin, and that such an interpretation of the law would permit incest with one’s grandmother. Kysarcius asks why anyone would want to do this, and Yorick references a historical case in which this happened.

Chapter 30. Heading downstairs, Toby asks Yorick what conclusion the church leaders have come too. Yorick says that they have concluded that neither Mrs. Shandy nor Walter are truly kin of Tristram.

Chapter 31. Though he enjoys listening to the ecclesiastical debates, Walter is deeply depressed once he returns home. His mood is saved, however, by news that Aunt Dinah has left him 1,000 pounds. He immediately starts to plan how he will invest it, settling on either enclosing nearby Ox-moor or sending Bobby off to travel. Walter struggles to decide, as both plans are longtime dreams of his. It is a Shandy family tradition to travel through Europe, and were Walter to spend the money enclosing Ox-moor, Bobby would be the first Shandy not to take such a trip. On the other hand, Ox-moor is a great piece of land that Walter’s ancestors acquired at great expense, and it presents extremely tempting business opportunity.

Walter agonizes over the decision. He reads about farming one day and about travel the next, and he debates with Toby, Yorick, and Obadiah over the best course of action. Eventually the decision becomes yet another misery for Walter which he is only rescued from by another misery: Bobby’s death.

Chapter 32. Tristram is now the Shandy heir-apparent, and so he dates this moment as the true beginning of his life and opinions. He intends to toss his pen into the fire in five minutes, but first must cross several items off of his list. He names this chapter the chapter of things and promises to begin the next volume with a chapter on whiskers. He laments that he has been too distracted to tell the story of Toby’s amours, which he believes to be the best part of the entire story. He asks the readers how they feel after four volumes—Tristram himself feels terrible, but he’s confident his readers are in better health. He declares that if he had a kingdom, it would be a kingdom of laughing and merry subjects, and it would be the wisest and happiest kingdom. With this moral in mind, he bids goodbye to the reader until next year, unless his cough kills him before then.