The Memory Keeper’s Daughter

by

Kim Edwards

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The Memory Keeper’s Daughter: Chapter 3: March 1964 Summary & Analysis

Summary
Analysis
Home from the hospital, Norah wakes to the sound of Paul crying. She reaches out to the basinet where he is asleep beside her bed, lifts him out, and begins nursing him, amazed by “the powers of the body” and the small life she has created. Even in a peaceful, lovely moment with her baby, Norah feels a deep “sorrow” take hold of her—she loves Paul, but mourns the stillborn daughter “who never took a breath.” Norah’s memories of delivering the babies are fuzzy and disordered, and she doesn’t remember ever laying eyes on her baby girl. As she nurses Paul she nods off, dozing as she reflects on her memories of the last few days.
Norah is deeply torn between the feelings of joy and love she has about her new son Paul and the pain, grief, and sorrow she feels when she thinks of the huge loss she’s suffered. Her life has been suffused with joy—but something precious has been lost, and she mourns the daughter she will never know.
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Before leaving the hospital, Norah begged David to see the baby girl’s body, but David refused to let her, insisting that she needed to be grateful for their “beautiful son.” David told Norah that he’d already had the baby girl’s body taken out to a farm and buried, and promised that he'd take her there later in the spring.
This passage shows that David is cruelly, desperately trying to keep his wife from mourning because it threatens to expose the lies he’s spreading. Like when he met Norah and told the lie about the robe, it’s clear that he prefers to use lying and manipulation to get the outcome he wants, rather than hashing out messy realities with his wife.
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Three hours later, Norah wakes up, changes Paul, and brings him into the living room to feed him. Bree, Norah’s younger sister, comes downstairs. She is about to make breakfast, and asks Norah if she can bring her anything. Norah asks for some water, and thinks quietly of how surprised she is that her sister—“her opposite, her nemesis”—is the person she wants here with her as she mourns Phoebe and adjusts to life with Paul. At only twenty, Bree has already eloped with an older man, divorced him, and changed her name from Brigitte. Norah is both resentful and jealous of her wild younger sister, and a part of her wishes “desperately” that she’d rebelled first and shed her “good” nature. Bree often tells Norah that Norah’s perfect, traditional life is “like a TV sitcom,” and when she says things like this, Norah stews silently in resentment and envy.   
The relationship between Bree and Norah is a source of sensitivity for Norah. Norah has always felt pressure to be perfect in the face of her sister’s wild streak—but secretly, Norah longs to have the freedom, gumption, and daring that her sister has. Norah resents being a cookie-cutter, picture-perfect wife, and this feeling will deepen as the novel goes on, spurring her into actions she might regret.
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Quotes
Bree comes back from the kitchen with toast and coffee for herself and Norah. She says she heard David get up and leave for work earlier, and comments that he’s been working almost nonstop. Bree worries that David has gone back to work so soon, but Norah retorts that if she had a job to go to, she’d go. Bree tells Norah that it’s better to feel one’s feelings than hide oneself away—like David is doing. Norah wonders if it is “macabre” that she wishes she had been able to see her daughter’s body before it was taken away, but Bree says it isn’t—it’s “completely reasonable.” Norah thanks Bree for coming to stay with her. As she looks down at Paul, she wonders if he will grow up with a “sense of loss” weighing down on him.
David’s desire to push the “loss” of his daughter from his mind isn’t really what it seems to be—he’s trying to forget the lie he’s told and bury it in the past. Norah, though, truly is grieving—and as such, she’s having a harder time getting back to normal. She wishes she could bury her head in the sand like David, but the sensitive Bree insists that Norah shouldn’t shut down her emotions because it’s convenient to.
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Get the entire The Memory Keeper’s Daughter LitChart as a printable PDF.
The Memory Keeper’s Daughter PDF
Later, while Paul sleeps, Norah takes a shower and tries to get dressed. She is upset that she still can’t fit into any of her pre-pregnancy clothes, and she settles for wearing a maternity romper. She hears the doorbell ring and listens as Bree answers the door and a familiar set of voices ring out in the living room. In spite of her insecurity about her appearance, Norah goes down to greet her guests—three women from her church. Bree serves tea while the women ask Norah how she’s doing. Norah insists she’s all right.
Though Norah is grieving, she’s desperate to maintain her physical and emotional appearance. She doesn’t want to betray how deeply affected she is by the loss of her daughter for fear of disturbing her picture-perfect exterior.
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When one of the women—who suspected from Norah’s size that she might be having twins, and excitedly told Norah for months that she was knitting her two blankets—presents Norah with just Paul’s blanket, Norah demands to know where “the other blanket” is, and devolves into hysterics when the other women refuse to acknowledge Norah’s loss and instead tell her to focus on her “beautiful baby boy.”
Norah can’t keep up a façade for long—the moment she’s reminded of her loss, she breaks down in angry tears, furious that everyone around her but Bree seems to be ignoring the huge trauma she’s facing. 
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Quotes
Norah collapses on the couch in tears, and Bree urges the church ladies to leave. After they do, though, Norah apologizes to Bree for acting dramatically, and admits that she should probably just “focus on the baby [she has.]” Bree, though, suggests that the more Norah tries to forget about Phoebe, the harder of a time she’ll have—she thinks Norah should have a memorial service for Phoebe, for her own peace of mind. Norah agrees. She calls her pastor and begins inquiring about holding a small, quiet service at church, and then places an ad in the papers for the service.
Bree is supportive of her sister’s emotions and wants for Norah to grieve properly so that moving on will be easier. Norah, feeling validated by Bree, begins doing things her way—this is the first push for independence she’s shown, but it will not be the last.
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Bree leaves for class at her university, and Norah walks through the house, taking in the mess, disarray, and “chaos” that have settled in since Paul’s birth. Surveying the mess, she pulls herself together and, after briefly checking on Paul, she cleans the house top to bottom before heating up dinner for her and David to share. When David walks in the door, she fixes him a whiskey and asks him about his day. The two catch up, and Norah asks David to get Paul up for a feeding, but David suggests the two of them enjoy some quiet time together.
Norah is determined to feel her feelings—but she doesn’t want to surrender her life to the chaos grief creates. She still desires a semblance of control over things, evidenced by her meticulous cleaning and insistence on doing her “wifely duties” of preparing dinner and drinks for her husband.
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Over dinner, Norah tells David about her desire to have a memorial service for Phoebe—but as she does, she can see David’s eyes growing dark. She asks him if he disapproves of the idea, and tells him that it “isn’t wrong” of her to want some closure. David lashes out, saying that though it isn’t wrong, he wishes she would have told him before placing an ad in the paper. Norah, growing angry herself, tells David there’s “no shame” in grieving their loss. David doesn’t answer her, and Norah realizes that, after over a year of marriage, she barely knows her husband. Norah asks David “what is happening” to the two of them, but David answers stiffly that Norah is “making a mountain out of a molehill.”
Norah and David are arguing about the same issue from completely different points of view. Norah has no idea of David’s deception—though she realizes that something between them has changed. David, in a desperate attempt to get away from the past and stifle Norah’s questions about their daughter, seeks to undermine her and convince her that her emotions and actions are inappropriate.
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Paul begins crying, and Norah storms out of the room to go fetch him. Norah promises herself that no matter what, she will go through with having the service—for herself. As she nurses Paul, she revels in the “sacred” bond she has with her son.
Norah is determined not to let whatever is happening between her and David derail her from her commitment to her son. This drive will be tested as the novel progresses.
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