They Both Die at the End: Mateo, 4:26 a.m. Summary & Analysis

Mateo thinks he’s failing to break out. On one hand, he doesn’t want to be around drunk partiers; on the other, he secretly believes that partying on the train is where he belongs. He’s just too afraid of disappointing people or looking like a fool. Surprisingly, Rufus follows Mateo into the hospital. Mateo reads the receptionist’s nametag and asks the receptionist, Jared, to see Dad. Jared refuses to let Mateo see Dad outside of visiting hours—until Rufus notes that Mateo is dying. Jared reminds Mateo that Dad is in a coma, which surprises Rufus, but Mateo says he still wants to say goodbye. Jared checks Mateo and Rufus in and offers his condolences. Somehow, they seem far more genuine than Andrea’s. On the way up, Mateo apologizes for not getting into the party car.

Mateo struggles up the stairs. From a few flights above, Rufus calls down that Mateo has to open himself up to new experiences. Mateo replies that he’ll feel more confident once he’s said goodbye. He leaves Rufus in the waiting area and goes to Dad’s room. Dad has been here for almost two weeks, since he suffered a stroke. Mateo has been waiting to hear that Dad is going to die, but now, he’s free of that responsibility. He takes Dad’s hand and tries not to cry; he doesn’t want Dad to wake up and find that Mateo is gone. Mateo is also frustrated that Dad’s not around—Dad should be here for Mateo, since he was here when Mateo was born and when Mateo’s mom died. On the back of his photo, Mateo writes Dad a note, promising to be brave, and puts it on the dresser.

Elizabeth, Dad’s nurse, enters and assures Mateo that Dad is in good hands. Mateo knows he has to say goodbye and says that it’s not fair that he has to leave without hearing Dad’s voice. Elizabeth asks if Mateo can tell her about Dad, since she knows so little about him. Mateo remembers Dad saying that people can become immortal through stories—he’s kept Mateo’s mom alive this way. Mateo says that Dad loved creating lists and thought his lists were hilarious. Dad was a great storyteller, and at times, Mateo felt like he was on the beach when Dad proposed to his mom the first time. Rufus interrupts, awed, and Mateo invites him in. Mateo says that his mom turned Dad down twice, but she agreed to marry him when she found out she was pregnant.

Mateo asks for 10 more minutes alone. He takes Dad’s hand and says it’s his turn to tell a story; he hopes Dad can hear. Mateo starts to say something about himself, but he can’t say it. The truth is complicated, even though he thinks it might not even mess things up. He thinks he’s keeping a secret, even from himself, because the lie is easier. Instead, Mateo sings parts of “Take This Waltz,” one of Dad’s favorites.