Themes
Key
LitCharts assigns a color and icon to each theme in This Is How It Always Is, which you can use to track the themes throughout the work.
Gender and Binaries
Secrets and Misunderstanding
Violence and Discrimination
Storytelling
Family
Summary
Analysis
As Rosie quickly thinks of how to talk Claude out of wearing the dress, Penn “accidentally, in his grief,” spills dead fish down the front of Claude’s dress. Upset, Claude goes upstairs to change and settles instead for one of Camry’s patent leather purses. Rosie shoves Claude’s lunch into the purse and hopes that it passes for some kind of lunch box. She doesn’t have much time to think about it. It is Ben and Roo’s first day of middle school, and when Orion comes downstairs for breakfast, he has a sticker of an eyeball stuck to the middle of his forehead. He winks at Rosie with one of his own eyes, and they all head out the door.
Presumably, Penn doesn’t “accidentally” spill anything—he spills on Claude’s dress on purpose so he will have to change. Penn spills the dead fish “in his grief,” which reflects how upset he is by Claude’s choice of clothing and suggests that he prefers for his son to embody traditional male traits. Of course, Penn seems ready to accept Claude either way, but in this moment, it is obvious that he isn’t exactly comfortable with Claude’s gender identity.
Themes
Later, when Rosie pulls up to the elementary school to pick up the younger boys, Orion and Rigel come out without Claude. Claude got into trouble, they tell Rosie. She looks to the school and can see Claude standing with his teacher, Miss Appleton, who has a rather firm hand on him. “Mrs. Adams?” Miss Appleton says to Rosie. “It’s Walsh, actually,” Rosie says. She doesn’t bother to tell Miss Appleton that it should be Ms., not Mrs., and in Rosie’s case, it is Dr. Miss Appleton says that Claude had a great first day of kindergarten until lunch time. Claude had a peanut butter sandwich, Miss Appleton says, so he had to eat it in the classroom instead of the cafeteria.
Penn’s last name is Adams, and presumably so is Claude’s, but Rosie goes by her maiden name, Walsh, which again reflects her independence as a woman. Rosie doesn’t like Miss Appleton calling her “Mrs.” because it reduces Rosie to her role as Penn’s wife. Rosie is a smart, independent woman, who is also a doctor, and she prefers to be addressed as such, not defaulted as “Mrs.,” which, to Rosie, is patronizing and demeaning.
Themes
Rosie is confused. Claude is the fifth child she has had at the school. She has packed 900 peanut butter sandwiches over the years, and she can’t understand why it is a problem now. Miss Appleton explains that with the increase in peanut allergies, no peanut butter “is implied” at the school. They don’t usually check the students’ lunches, the teacher explains, and they only discovered Claude’s “forbidden sandwich” because he was telling the other students how ladies eat peanut butter finger sandwiches.
This passage hints that it wasn’t Claude’s sandwich that caught Miss Appleton’s attention—it was the red patent leather purse the sandwich was in and Claude’s reference to ladies and finger sandwiches. As she thinks Claude is a boy, Miss Appleton likely thinks it is unusual that he has a purse, and the sandwich gives her an excuse to talk to Rosie about it.
Themes
Rosie asks if anyone in Claude’s class is allergic to peanuts, and Miss Appleton says it is more of a precaution. She then explains to Rosie that they also don’t allow “accessories” at school, like sparkly shirts or purses. If students are playing with “accessories,” Miss Appleton says, it is difficult for them to learn. Rosie asks if Claude was playing with his purse, and Miss Appleton admits that he wasn’t, but the other children were “distracted” by it. Boys don’t really need purses for school, Miss Appleton says. “It’s not purse,” Claude says, “It’s a lunch tote.”
Rosie clearly thinks that the ban on peanut butter is ridiculous, especially since there aren’t any kids in the class who are allergic to peanut butter, just as Miss Appleton’s concerns about the purse are ridiculous. Likely, if a little girl brought the purse to school, it would go unnoticed, but because Miss Appleton believes Claude is a boy, it makes her uncomfortable.
Themes
Get the entire This Is How It Always Is LitChart as a printable PDF.
The next day, Rosie makes cheese sandwiches for everyone, and when Claude comes downstairs for breakfast, he is wearing a dress fashioned out of one his own t-shirts layered over one of Penn’s. Rigel immediately tells him to change. The other kids will beat him up, Rigel says. Ben interrupts. It isn’t that Claude’s outfit isn’t nice, he says, it just isn’t “manly.” Claude isn’t a man, Penn says, he is a boy, but Roo points out that Claude might not even be that. “Roo!” Rosie yells. Penn stops their yelling and arguing. No one is beating up Claude, he says.
Rigel and Ben’s concern over Claude again shows how much they love him, even if they aren’t the best at showing it. Ben doesn’t want Claude to feel bad, but he still implies that Claude must fulfill some “manly” ideal and not be quite so feminine. Rigel’s concern that Claude will get beat up reflects the abuse and bullying transgender and other LGBTQ kids go through.
Themes
Penn knows that Claude should just be allowed to be who he wants to be—who he really is—but he knows Claude would be happier if who he was didn’t draw so much attention. Penn thinks of Orion. He has always gone to school in strange outfits (the third eye he has on today is just one example), and the worst Orion has been accused of is being “imaginative.” Claude goes upstairs to change and comes back down wearing only his own t-shirt and a pair of shorts. At the end of the day, when Claude comes home, he changes back into the dress, and he even adds some color barrettes in his hair and a pair of Camry’s earrings.
Orion is only accused of being “imaginative” because his outfits don’t violate accepted gender norms and acting out and pulling pranks is stereotypically considered to be something boys do. Claude changes back into the dress after he gets home from school, which implies he is most comfortable in the dress. Claude’s school clothes are like a uniform, but his dresses are a reflection of who he really is.
Themes
After days of watching Claude change his clothes every day after school, Rosie asks if he is getting tired of so much changing. Claude tells her it’s fine, but he is quite unconvincing. Penn hesitates, and then he tells Claude that if he wants to wear dresses to school, he should just go ahead and do it. “It’s okay,” Penn says. No, Claude says, it isn’t—he know the other kids will make fun of him. Rosie offers to talk to Miss Appleton, but Claude asks her not to. Miss Appleton thinks he is “weird,” Claude says, and she doesn’t like him very much.
Miss Appleton doesn’t like Claude because he doesn’t conform to established gender norms, which reflects the abuse and discrimination members of the LGBTQ community face, as does Claude’s fear that the other kids will make fun of him. Claude is just a kid, yet Miss Appleton passes judgement on him and makes him feel “weird.”
Themes
It is fine, Claude says. He will just wear school clothes to school and “real clothes” when he gets home. Penn is saddened by Claude’s use of the word “real” and reminds him that everyone loves him just for who he is. That isn’t true, Claude says. Only his family loves him for who he really is.
Claude’s reference to his dresses as his “real clothes” again implies that he is most comfortable in dresses, and that they are a better reflection of who he is; whereas Claude’s school clothes, which identify him as a boy, are more like a costume he is forced to wear.
Themes
