This Is How It Always Is: Part I: Push Summary & Analysis

By April, Claude’s hair has grown down to his ears, and he transitions into Poppy. Poppy comes down each morning for breakfast, dressed in brightly colored dresses, yoga pants, and tiaras, and she is perfectly happy. In fact, Rosie admits, all her kids seem happy, and even Miss Appleton has come around with a switch to sunflower-butter sandwiches. Poppy’s change, however, is more difficult for Rosie and Penn. Penn constantly mixes up names, and he doesn’t just call Poppy Claude. He calls Rigel Orion, and he calls Ben Rufus, although no one knows who Rufus is. He calls Poppy both “he” and “she,” and he introduces Rosie at a party as his husband. Through all of this, Poppy is unbothered, and she is growing increasingly popular.

Poppy has a calendar that she keeps all her playdates in, and Rosie hates it. To Penn, the calendar is proof that Poppy has adjusted, and that she is out living life and being seen; however, Rosie sees the packed calendar as “PC bullshit and a strange Poppy cachet.” These people aren’t their friends, she warns, they are parents encouraging their kids to play with Poppy so they can appear “open-minded and tolerant.” With Poppy’s new social calendar, they begin a “no-fly” list of people Poppy definitely can’t play with again. For example, one little girl’s father made an off-color joke about drag queens, and one girl’s mother asked Rosie way too many questions about Poppy’s genitals, and another couple tried to explain to Penn when he went to pick up Poppy that God doesn’t make mistakes.

One day, Rosie drops Poppy off to play with Nicky Calcutti, a boy Poppy has known since before her transition. Nicky’s mom, Cindy, sent Rosie a message and asked how she was after Claude’s transition to Poppy. She said Poppy was still welcome to play with Nicky, and she invited him over for ice cream. Soon after Rosie drops Poppy off, she calls her in tears to come get her. Penn is closer, so she calls him and turns the car in the direction of Nicky’s house. When she pulls up, Penn is just getting out of the van with the boys, and Poppy runs out of the house, straight into the arms of her brothers.

Nicky’s father, Nick, steps out onto the porch, and Rosie asks what happened. “Your kid’s a faggot, that’s what happened,” he says. Rosie turns and orders everyone into the car, and Penn asks Nick why Poppy thinks he has a gun. “’Cause I do,” Nick says. Men shouldn’t have to hide two things. “This,” he says, grabbing his crotch, “and this,” he says, lifting his shirt and revealing a gun on his hip. Suddenly, Cindy pulls up, clearly aware of what is happening. She glances at Rosie with embarrassment and pushes her son and husband into the house. As Cindy closes the door, Rosie can hear Nick ask Cindy why she lets their son play with “faggots and assholes.” Cindy texts later to apologize, but Rosie doesn’t bother to read it and puts Nicky on the “no-fly” list.