It sounds glorious, but with months left until graduation, I have no clue what the future looks like. If Opportunity shaped me, I didn’t notice. Running, I know. This track, I know. One step after another after another. It doesn’t matter what comes next, as long as I keep moving forward.
It’s as if all of Opportunity falls away. We’re lost between making a home and escaping one. It won’t be long before our secrets choke us, before she finally realizes I don’t deserve her and she leaves me too.
Before we broke up, Tyler told me the best part of high school was getting out ASAP. Still, I wish it didn’t have to end yet. It’ll be hard to say good-bye to our team, to our cadets, to each other. Life will be grayer without seeing Chris all day, every day.
Because what can I tell her? That I have the ticket out of town she’s been longing for? That I don’t even know what to do with it? Before Mamá fell ill, I would’ve leaped at this chance. But how can I leave now? Autumn would never understand.
My brother, who cared for my bruises when Dad couldn’t contain his grief. Who helped me dance in secret. My fingers wrap around the ballet charm. Even after everything he’s done, he is my home.
The only things that give us purpose are the stories that tie us together. We all have so many secrets to keep. And I hold mine close.
I smiled sadly, not wanting to deny him his dream. Almost everyone in our class talked about leaving Opportunity, but even though Ty wasn’t happy here, he never did. Sometimes it felt as if he and I walked the same road, but each of us was going in a different direction.
The Browne family had been part of Opportunity for generations—but no more. When Mrs. Browne died, Ty raged against everyone who tried to help him. He wouldn’t eat the food anyone brought; he snarled at our sympathy. Still, the town forgave his grief. Until Mr. Browne drowned his sorrows in alcohol and Tyler doused his in hatred. After a while, Opportunity took the withdrawal and the lashing out personally.
This isn’t about returning fire or self-defense. This is about revenge. If this guy hurt my sister or anyone else, I’ll kill him. Slowly.
“Ty wasn’t just angry,” I manage at last. “He was vindictive. When he got into fights with Tomás, he wouldn’t take it out on him. He’d take it out on the people close to you.”
This town—this school is taking everything away from me. My home. My mother. My sister. Why am I to blame?
I can’t imagine what it’s like not to have that. For as much as I despise Tyler, I love Autumn. It’s why I could never tell her what he did. I want her to be able to keep the only true family she has.
“It was your fault,” he says. “All of this, it’s your fault.”
I need to get to Sylv before Ty sees her. Because if he does, there will be nothing left. If she dies, I will never be able to tell her that she is the one who keeps me standing. That her lips taste like a promise. That she makes me want to be a better version of myself.
It’s everywhere and all consuming. Some days you think you can’t go on because the only thing waiting for you is more despair. Some days you don’t want to go on because it’s easier to give up than to get hurt again.
“Do you think it would’ve made any difference if I stayed with Ty?”
Chris winces. “No. I don’t think there’s anything any of us could have done.”
There are so many people here, and Chris is by my side, but I have never felt more alone. I wish my parents were here, but at the same time I’m not ready to face them.
You can’t always settle your life in one place. The world was made to change. But as long as you cherish the memories and make new ones along the way, no matter where you are, you’ll always be at home.
The last thing I see before I fade is Ty turning the gun on himself. The last thing I hear is Ty saying, “I just don’t want to be alone anymore.”
Ty made good on his promise. I didn’t need to die for him to kill me. He simply lowered his gun and pulled the trigger. And his bullet tore my knee to shreds.
We are tied to Opportunity, and maybe that’s the way it’s supposed to be. We plant our seeds here to take root and blossom.
I hold on for one more moment. Then, around me, other lanterns are released. They float over our heads into the darkness, toward the promise of a new day.
