Haikumom / Odessa Ortiz Quotes in Water by the Spoonful
ORANGUTAN: The ocean reminds me of Maine. Cold water, very quiet, fisherman, boats, the breeze. I wouldn’t try swimming. I was never one to actually have an experience.
HAIKUMOM: So unless someone gets that desperate they don’t deserve our noble company? “Suffer like me, or you ain’t legit?”
ORANGUTAN: Haikumom’s growing claws.
HAIKUMOM: Just don’t act entitled because you got so low.
JOHN: I lied in my first post. I’ve been smoking crack for two years. I’ve tried quitting hundreds of times. Day two? Please, I’m in the seven-hundredth day of hell.
ODESSA: You got it out of your system. Most people lie at one time or another on the site. The good news is, two years in, there’s still time.
ELLIOT: Let’s not act like this is some heroic sacrifice. Like this makes her the world’s martyr.
YAZ: We’re not going to get more than fifteen bucks for it.
ELLIOT: Symbols matter, Yaz. This isn’t about the money. This is shaking hands. This is tipping your hat. This is holding the door open. This is the bare minimum. The least effort possible to earn the label “person.”
YAZ: Why wouldn’t you ask me for help? Why would you deal with that alone?
ELLIOT: The opposite of alone. I seen barracks that looked like dope houses. It was four months in my life, it’s over. We’ve chopped up a lot of shit together, Yaz, but we ain’t gonna chop this up. This shit stays in the vault. You got me?
ELLIOT: Yaz. Please. Please.
ELLIOT: Titi, Odessa fucking OD’d and she’s dying on her living room floor and I can’t take this anymore! COME GET US before I walk off and leave her on the sofa.
YAZ: If you need to, go. No guilt. I got this.
ELLIOT: She’s my mom. Can I be angry? Can you let me be angry?
CHUTES&LADDERS: Why are you there? Were you using with her?
CHUTES&LADDERS: Did you sell her the stuff?
FOUNTAINHEAD: No, Jesus, of course not. She gave them my number. I’m her emergency contact. Why, I have no idea, we’re practically strangers.
YAZ: […] I wrote a list [of achievements] on a piece of paper and dug a hole in Fairmount Park and put it in the ground and said, “When I turn thirty, I’ll dig it up and cross it all off.” And I promise you I’ll never have the courage to go to that spot with a shovel and face my list full of crumbs, decoys, and bandaids.
ELLIOT: I wanted Mami Odessa to relapse, Yaz. I wanted her to pick up that needle. I knew precisely what to do, what buttons to push, I engineered that shit, I might as well have pushed the thing into her vein. Because I thought, Why would God take the good one? Yo, take the bad mom instead! I was like, Why wouldn’t you take the bad fucking mom? If I stay in Philly, I’m gonna turn into it. I’m gonna become one of them. I’m already hallway there. You’ve got armor, you’ve got ideas, but I don’t.
YAZ: Go. Go and don’t you ever, ever look back.