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Summary
Themes
and Colors
Key
LitCharts assigns a color and icon to each theme in When Mr. Pirzada Came to Dine, which you can use to track the themes throughout the work.
Family, Ritual, and Shared Time
Diaspora, Alienation, and Loss
Food, Culture, and Connection
Independence, Revolution, and Violence
Youth and Innocence vs. Maturity and Responsibility
Summary
Analysis
The narrator (whose name is later revealed to be Lilia) recalls the fall of 1971, when she was 10 years old. For a few months, a man named Mr. Pirzada would routinely come to her childhood home for dinner, “bearing confections in his pocket and hopes of ascertaining the life or death of his family.”
Though Lilia’s story is set in 1971, this opening paragraph makes it clear that Lilia herself is now looking back on this time with some distance. The statement that Mr. Pirzada had hopes of “ascertaining the life or death of his family” suggests that there is some sort of conflict going on, and that Mr. Pirzada’s family is caught in the middle of it. But because Lilia was so young at this time, her adult understanding of the high stakes of this period contrasts with her 10-year-old self’s fixation on the “confections” in Mr. Pirzada’s pocket. This early emphasis on sweets also suggests that candy is an important part of how Lilia understands Mr. Pirzada and her relationship with him.
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Mr. Pirzada is from Dacca, the capital city of Bangladesh. In the fall of 1971, however, Bangladesh isn’t its own country yet—it’s under Pakistani rule and is known known as East Pakistan. The people in East Pakistan are fighting an increasingly brutal fight for their independence from the rulers in West Pakistan. In the spring of 1971, the Pakistani Army violently invaded Dacca, shot teachers, assaulted women, and killed over 300,000 people.
The Bangladesh War of Independence (also known as the Bangladesh Liberation War) provides the background for most of the action in the story; here, Lilia gives a brief history of that conflict. In the fall, when Mr. Pirzada first starts coming over, war hasn’t been formally declared yet, but the violent conflict leading up to the war has been going on for about six months. By this point, West Pakistan was widely considered to have waged a genocidal campaign against East Pakistani people.
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Before this conflict, Mr. Pirzada lived a cozy life in Dacca: he had a nice house, a good job as a botany professor, a wife, and seven daughters whose names all start with “A.” Now, he carries a picture of his daughters in his wallet to show Lilia. He writes to his wife and sends comic books to his daughters, but the conflict has disrupted the postal system in Dacca, so he has not heard from any of his family members in six months.
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Mr. Pirzada is here—in the suburb of Boston where Lilia’s family lives—for work: the Pakistani government has given him a grant to study trees and leaves in New England. However, the grant does not provide Mr. Pirzada with enough money to eat well or buy a TV, so he comes over to Lilia’s house to eat dinner and watch the news.
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Initially, Lilia doesn’t know why Mr. Pirzada spends so much more time at her house than the rest of her family friends do. All she understands is that her parents, emigrants from India, often miss their homeland’s foods and traditions. In their small suburb, for example, “the supermarket d[oes] not carry mustard oil,” and “neighbors never drop[] by without an invitation.” Lilia’s parents therefore try to make Indian friends at the university where her father teaches, checking the phonebook for other South Asian last names—which is what leads them to call Mr. Pirzada.
Though Lilia cannot recall when Mr. Pirzada started coming over, by the end of September, she’s so used to his presence that she assumes he will come over every night. One evening, while her mother cooks fried spinach and radishes, Lilia asks her father for “a glass for the Indian man.” Her father informs her that Mr. Pirzada will not be coming over that night—and that “more importantly, Mr. Pirzada is no longer considered Indian.”
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When Lilia is confused by this new information, her father explains Partition. In 1947, soon after India gained independence from Britain, India and Pakistan split along religious lines. “One moment we were free,” Lilia’s father recalls, “and then we were sliced up […] Hindus here, Muslims here.” As Lilia’s father tells her, Partition was a time of great violence between Hindus (like her family) and Muslims (like Mr. Pirzada). Given this conflict, to many people who survived Partition, “the idea of eating in each other’s company [i]s still unthinkable.”
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Lilia does not understand this division, because Mr. Pirzada and her parents speak the same language, look similar, and eat the same foods. But Lilia’s father insists that Mr. Pirzada is a Bengali Muslim, and that he might be offended by being called “Indian.” To illustrate his point, her father takes Lilia to the family’s map and directs her attention to the triangle that is South Asia. Lilia is surprised to see that the two parts of Pakistan are separated from each other by so much land. “It was as if California and Connecticut constituted a nation apart from the U.S,” she reflects.
Lilia’s father assumes she is aware of the conflict in East Pakistan; Lilia is not, but she does not want her to father to know this. As Lilia’s mother drains the rice, her father asks Lilia what she’s learning at school, as she is clearly not being taught about East Pakistan’s fight for independence. Lilia’s mother, however, believes Lilia is being taught “plenty.” Her mother thinks that because they live in the U.S. now, it is good for Lilia to have a real American education.
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Lilia’s mother reflects on her own childhood, which was filled with violence, food rations, and educational pressure. She is glad her daughter will not have to experience the same thing. She thinks it is unreasonable to expect that Lilia will be taught about Partition, but Lilia’s father continues to worry, asking, “what does she learn about the world?”
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Lilia learns exclusively U.S. history and geography, with a special emphasis on the American Revolution. She is taken on field trips to important sites of U.S. history, like the Freedom Trail and Bunker Hill, and she makes colorful dioramas of George Washington. Lilia can find the Thirteen Colonies on a map effortlessly, because she has been tested on them so often.
The next evening, Mr. Pirzada arrives at six, having walked over from the dormitory where he lives. He shakes hands with Lilia’s father and, as always, Lilia takes his coat. Mr. Pirzada is always well-dressed, and he stands very straight, “as if balancing in either hand two suitcases of equal weight.” He has thick lashes, a mustache, and ear hair that Lilia thinks helps him “block out the unpleasant traffic of life.” He also wears a black wool fez that Lilia never sees him without.
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When Mr. Pirzada arrives, he jokes that he is “‘another refugee […] on Indian territory.’” Lilia’s father responds that there are currently nine million refugees from Dacca in India. Lilia notes that Mr. Pirzada’s coat, which always “carries the faint smell of limes,” has a hand-stitched label that reads “Z. Sayeed, Suitors.”
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Mr. Pirzada takes off his shoes, which are muddy—he likes to stop and study the trees on his walk to Lilia’s family’s house. Once he has taken off his coat and shoes, he grazes Lilia’s throat, “the way a person feels for solidity behind a wall.” Then, Mr. Pirzada follows Lilia’s father into the living room, where the TV is playing local news. Lilia’s mother offers Mr. Pirzada a kebab, and as Mr. Pirzada eats, he wonders if the refugees in Dacca are well-fed.
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As is his tradition, Mr. Pirzada presents Lilia with a candy: this time, it is a plastic egg filled with cinnamon hearts. Lilia awaits this “ritual” with both dread and delight—she is impressed with Mr. Pirzada’s elegance, but sometimes his ease makes her feel “like a stranger in [her] own home.” Lilia struggles to express her gratitude for these desserts; whenever she tries to thank Mr. Pirzada, he complains that he is thanked for everything in the U.S., and jokes that “if I am buried in this country, I will be thanked, no doubt, at my funeral.”
Lilia recalls that she could never eat the candy Mr. Pirzada gave her right away, because it seemed too special. Rather, Lilia stores these treats like they are jewels, placing each one in the sandalwood box that her grandmother used to use for ground Areca nuts. This box is the “only memento” Lilia has of her grandmother, whom she never met. Some nights, before she brushes her teeth, Lilia will open the box and eat one of Mr. Pirzada’s gifts.
Tonight, Mr. Pirzada eats with the family—as usual—in the living room, to have an unobstructed view of the TV news. As they watch, Lilia’s mother brings out a variety of traditional Indian dishes. Lilia helps with water, lemon wedges, and chili peppers; her parents buy these peppers in bulk in Chinatown, and Mr. Pirzada and her parents like to crush the chilis into their food.
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Lilia studies Mr. Pirzada to figure out “what makes him different”—“not an Indian.” She notes that Mr. Pirzada always takes out a watch and puts it on the coffee table while they eat. The watch is set to Dacca time, and Lilia becomes “uneasy” when she realizes that for Mr. Pirzada, “life [is] being lived in Dacca first.” While her family eats dinner, he is imagining his daughters waking up and getting ready for school. “Our meals, our actions,” Lilia reflects, “were only a shadow of what had already happened there, a lagging ghost of where Mr. Pirzada belonged.”
Usually, Lilia reads during the evening news, but tonight her father makes her watch it. On TV, she sees military tanks, burning buildings, and people fleeing. Lilia watches Mr. Pirzada watch the TV, but he betrays little emotion.
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At the commercial break, Lilia’s mother goes to get more rice, and her father and Mr. Pirzada discuss politics. As Lilia’s father gives her more fish, he tells her to watch what “children your age […] do to survive.” Lilia has lost her appetite, and instead she watches Mr. Pirzada calmly eat his rice and lentils. She wonders if Mr. Pirzada is always so well-dressed so that he can “endure with dignity” whatever new atrocity appears on the screen. She also imagines his relief at seeing his wife and daughters safe on TV, but that never happens.
Later that night, Lilia struggles to feel the “ceremonial satisfaction” she normally does when she puts Mr. Pirzada’s candies away. She has trouble reconciling Mr. Pirzada with the “unruly, sweltering world” she has just seen on TV. Lilia begins to picture Mr. Pirzada’s wife and daughters in the violence, and she panics. She tries to distract herself from these thoughts by looking around her room at the familiar yellow curtains and the place on the wall where her father marks her height. But she is unable to banish the gory images from her mind.
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Lilia begins to suspect that Mr. Pirzada’s family is dead. To ward off this feeling, she eats a candy Mr. Pirzada has given her, and as she chews, she prays that his family is safe and sound—this is the first time Lilia has ever prayed in her life. That night, she does not brush her teeth, because she fears that if she rinses the candy taste out of her mouth, she will rinse out the prayer as well.
Nobody at Lilia’s school discusses what is happening in East Pakistan. Everyone just keeps focusing on the long-ago American Revolution—they memorize parts of the Declaration of Independence, and boys pretend to be British Redcoats and American colonists at recess. With her friend Dora, Lilia is assigned to do a report on the British surrender at Yorktown, the battle that marked the end of the American Revolution. Mrs. Kenyon, the teacher who assigned the project, sends the two girls to the library to do research.
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While at the library, Lilia stumbles into the “Asia” section of books. She eventually finds a book about Pakistan, and she becomes engrossed in a chapter about Dacca, where Mr. Pirzada is from. Dora interrupts Lilia’s reading to tell her that Mrs. Kenyon is coming to check on their progress. When Mrs. Kenyon sees that Lilia is reading about Pakistan, she tells Lilia that if the book is not for her report, there is “no reason to consult it.” She takes the book from Lilia and puts it back on the shelf.
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As time goes on, Dacca is less and less discussed on the TV news, even though the violence continues to escalate. Still, Mr. Pirzada “enjoy[s] long, leisurely meals” with Lilia’s parents. He stays late into the night, and when the adults can no longer discuss politics, they move on to other topics, like the men’s work and “the peculiar eating habits” of Lilia’s mother’s American co-workers.
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On these nights, Lilia’s parents eventually send her to bed—but from her bedroom, Lilia still hears the adults listening to Kishore Kumar cassettes, playing games, and “anticipating the birth of a nation on the other side of the world.” As Lilia falls asleep, she wants “to console Mr. Pirzada somehow,” but there is nothing she can do besides eat his candy and pray for his family in Dacca.
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In October, Mr. Pirzada asks about the pumpkins he sees on people’s doorsteps, so Lilia explains the concept of a Halloween jack-o’-lantern. The next evening, Lilia’s mother brings a pumpkin home, and Mr. Pirzada tells Lilia he will help her carve it. For the first time, everybody gathers around the dining table instead of watching the TV. Lilia shows Mr. Pirzada how he should carve the pumpkin, and he begins to cut off the top and make holes for eyes.
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Lilia and Mr. Pirzada debate whether they want the jack-o’-lantern’s mouth to be a smile or a frown. Mr. Pirzada wields the knife with ease—but as he carves, a reporter on the news announces that India will go to war with Pakistan unless other countries volunteer to take East Pakistani refugees. Mr. Pirzada’s hand slips, and he damages the jack-o’-lantern’s mouth.
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Mr. Pirzada offers to buy another pumpkin, but Lilia’s father carves around the gash, turning the pumpkin’s mouth into a gaping hole. The pumpkin, which Lilia had meant to look frightening and fierce, now looks astonished instead.
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Both Lilia and Dora dress up as green-faced witches for Halloween. Lilia’s mother gives them old basmati rice sacks to trick-or-treat with—this is the first year the girls will be allowed to trick-or-treat by themselves, without parental supervision. Lilia’s father makes her synchronize her watch to his and tells her to keep the watch on the entire night.
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Mr. Pirzada brings Lilia candy, as he always does, but he jokes that she does not need it tonight, since it’s Halloween. Mr. Pirzada checks to see that Lilia will be warm enough under her costume. He then takes off his own coat, but as Lilia goes to grab it, she is distracted by Dora calling for help with her makeup.
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Lilia's father and Mr. Pirzada linger in the living room, listening to the sounds of other trick-or-treaters. Lilia’s father warns Lilia to be safe, and Mr. Pirzada worries that trick-or-treating is dangerous. Lilia’s mother assures him that it is “tradition,” and that all the children will be safe.
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Mr. Pirzada volunteers to accompany Lilia and Dora—he begins to fret about rain or that the girls will get lost, and his eyes betray a “panic” that frightens Lilia. “Don’t worry,” Lilia tells Mr. Pirzada. She has wanted to say these words many times to comfort him about his own family, and she is disappointed that she can only comfort Mr. Pirzada in reference to herself. Mr. Pirzada finally lets her and Dora go by themselves. “If the lady insists,” he says to Lilia.
As Dora and Lilia leave, Mr. Pirzada stands in Lilia’s family’s driveway and waves to them. Dora asks Lilia why Mr. Pirzada wanted to come with them. Lilia explains that Mr. Pirzada’s daughters are “missing,” but then she worries that saying this out loud makes it true. Lilia backtracks, telling Dora, “I meant, he misses them. They live in a different country, and he hasn’t seen them in a while, that’s all.”
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Lilia admires all the Halloween decorations in her neighborhood. As she and Dora go house to house, collecting candy, some of the parents tell Lilia that they have “never seen an Indian witch before.” Lilia and Dora see signs of teenage pranks (toilet paper and cracked eggs) as they walk to Dora’s house. By the time the girls arrive at Dora’s, their feet hurt from walking, and their hands hurt from the burlap rice sacks.
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Dora’s mother gives the girls popcorn and cider, and she reminds Lilia to call home. When Lilia calls her mother, she hears the TV on in the background. When she hangs up, she realizes that the TV is not even on in Dora’s house. Dora’s father is reading a magazine with a glass of wine next to him; there is saxophone music coming from the stereo, but no television news.
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After Lilia and Dora have gone through all of their candy, Lilia returns home to see that her jack-o’-lantern has been smashed in the driveway. Lilia starts to tear up, and she expects that her family and Mr. Pirzada will be similarly distressed. But when she enters the house, the three adults are sitting on the sofa, with the TV turned off. Mr. Pirzada has his head in his hands, but he is not concerned about the jack-o’-lantern.
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Lilia explains that that night, the adults had learned that Dacca would not accept anything less than full independence—and the war would be waged entirely on East Pakistani soil. War is officially declared on December 4th and lasts for 12 days. On December 16th, Dacca declares victory, and East Pakistan becomes the independent nation that is now known as Bangladesh. In retrospect, Lilla emphasizes that “all of these facts I know only now […] for they are available to me in any history book, in any library. But then it remained […] a remote mystery with haphazard clues.”
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During those 12 days of war, Lilla’s father no longer asks her to watch the news, Mr. Pirzada stops bringing candy, and her mother only cooks rice and eggs. Some nights, Mr. Pirzada sleeps on Lilia’s family’s couch; other nights, Lilia’s parents are on the phone with relatives from Calcutta. During this time, Lilia’s parents and Mr. Pirzada act as “a single person, sharing a single meal, a single body, a single silence, and a single fear.”
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In January, Mr. Pirzada returns home to Dacca to see what remains of his life there. In retrospect, Lilia does not remember what their last meal together was like, but she knows that her father drove him to the airport while she was at school. Lilia and her family continue to watch the news at dinner—now without their guest—and they learn that Dacca is slowly rebuilding. More than one million houses were wrecked by the war, and the refugees returning from India now face famine and unemployment. Lilia pictures Mr. Pirzada looking for his family; she stares at the map on her wall and realizes it is now outdated.
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During the Muslim New Year, Mr. Pirzada sends a card to Lilia’s family—this is the first time they have heard from him since he left. He explains that he has been reunited with his wife and children, who escaped the worst violence at a relative’s house outside of Dacca. Mr. Pirzada writes that his daughters are taller now, but that he still has trouble keeping track of their “A” names. At the end of the letter, he thanks Lilia’s family but feels that he will never be able to properly express his gratitude.
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Lilia’s mother suggests a toasts for Mr. Pirzada, but Lilia does not feel like celebrating. Instead, though Mr. Pirzada has been gone for months, Lilia only now realizes how much she misses him, “just as he had missed his wife and daughters for so many months.” Lilia’s parents predict—correctly—that they will never Mr. Pirzada again. For the first time since January, Lilia does not eat a piece of candy before bed; “there [is] no need to.” Eventually, Lilia throws the candy away.
