The Full Text of “What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why (Sonnet 43)”
1What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why,
2I have forgotten, and what arms have lain
3Under my head till morning; but the rain
4Is full of ghosts tonight, that tap and sigh
5Upon the glass and listen for reply,
6And in my heart there stirs a quiet pain
7For unremembered lads that not again
8Will turn to me at midnight with a cry.
9Thus in the winter stands the lonely tree,
10Nor knows what birds have vanished one by one,
11Yet knows its boughs more silent than before:
12I cannot say what loves have come and gone,
13I only know that summer sang in me
14A little while, that in me sings no more.
The Full Text of “What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why (Sonnet 43)”
1What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why,
2I have forgotten, and what arms have lain
3Under my head till morning; but the rain
4Is full of ghosts tonight, that tap and sigh
5Upon the glass and listen for reply,
6And in my heart there stirs a quiet pain
7For unremembered lads that not again
8Will turn to me at midnight with a cry.
9Thus in the winter stands the lonely tree,
10Nor knows what birds have vanished one by one,
11Yet knows its boughs more silent than before:
12I cannot say what loves have come and gone,
13I only know that summer sang in me
14A little while, that in me sings no more.
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“What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why (Sonnet 43)” Introduction
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"What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why," first published in 1920 in Vanity Fair, is an Italian sonnet written by the Pulitzer Prize-winning writer and feminist Edna St. Vincent Millay. In the poem, a speaker looks back on her previous loves and lovers whom she has forgotten. The speaker is tormented by the loss of her memories of love and regrets having loved at all. Millay purposefully uses the form of an Italian sonnet, a form that traditionally honors and exalts love, to question whether it is worth it to love at all.
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“What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why (Sonnet 43)” Summary
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The speaker wonders about the people she has kissed, where she has kissed them, and for what reason she has kissed them. She has forgotten all of the specifics of her previous lovers, including whose arms she has rested her head upon at night until the morning. As the speaker reflects on her loss of memories at night, she hears the sound of the rain tapping on the window as if it were the tapping of ghosts. These ghosts, a metaphor for either her memories or previous lovers, want to get her attention and wait for her to answer them. Unfortunately, the speaker can only respond by feeling heartache for all of the lovers she has forgotten and, as such, who will never again call out to her in the middle of the night.
The speaker goes on to compare herself to a solitary tree during the winter. This tree does not know the birds that have left its branches. Rather, the tree only knows that its branches are quieter and lonelier than they were before the birds' arrival. Similarly, the speaker is unable to describe her previous loves and lovers. All she knows is that she experienced pleasurable and summery feelings of love in the past, though only for a brief time; now, the speaker is filled only with a sense of loss.
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“What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why (Sonnet 43)” Themes
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Love, Memory, and Loss
In “What my lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why,” the speaker reflects on her previous lovers, all of whom she has forgotten. She mourns not the loss of these lovers themselves, but rather the loss of her memories of them. Other love poems might more commonly grieve an unrequited love or the death of a lover. However, this poem seems to radically suggest that it would be better if the speaker had never loved at all, rather than be forever haunted by the loss of her memories of that love.
The speaker admits she’s forgotten whom she’s kissed or slept with, as well as the details behind those encounters. She does not remember “[w]hat lips” she has kissed or “what arms” she has rested her head upon. The fact that these body parts are disassociated from names and faces makes for unsettling images that parallel the speaker’s unnerving lack of memory. Furthermore, the speaker does not remember “where” she has had past romantic encounters and, perhaps more importantly, she does not remember “why” she has had them either. She has not only lost the specifics of her memories—she has also lost the passionate emotions behind them. The thought of these emotions, which once may have comforted her, is now only a reminder of her loss and pain.
Consequently, the speaker is haunted by the fact that she’s forgotten these memories and emotions. The rain outside her window sounds as though it is full of “ghosts … tap[ping] and sigh[ing]/ [u]pon the glass.” These may be the ghosts of her previous lovers themselves or the ghosts of the speaker's memories of those lovers. Either way, these ghosts actively demand the speaker’s attention and wait for her “reply.” They want to be let inside or acknowledged; however, the speaker is unable to do either. The window that separates these ghosts and the speaker represents the division between the speaker’s memories and her present self. Though she cannot name or discern these ghosts individually, the speaker is taunted by their general presence. Similarly, just as she cannot recall her previous lovers individually, the speaker is tormented by her knowledge that they once existed.
As a result of forgetting these lovers, the speaker suffers from a “quiet pain” and loneliness. The adjective “unremembered” is key to the speaker’s pain. The speaker is not simply pained by the loss of her lovers, but rather by the fact that she has “unremembered” them. To emphasize this, the speaker compares herself to a “lonely tree.” Birds once filled this tree’s branches, but have since departed. In fact, the loss of these birds makes the tree “more silent than before.” Thus, the loss of what the tree and the speaker once possessed—the birds and the memories, respectively—causes greater silence and pain than if they had never possessed them in the first place.
Similarly, the speaker once experienced “summer,” a reference to her previous experiences and memories of love. Her summer state, however, only lasted “[a] little while” in comparison to her current, permanent state of “winter.” The winter season is typically associated with a loss of life and vibrancy, a state that reflects the speaker’s profound pain. The progression from summer to winter is also symbolic of the passage of time and the speaker growing older.
If the speaker were mourning the loss of a specific lover, she could console herself with memories of that person. But because she’s lost even her memories of love, and the corresponding feelings of warmth and pleasure associated with them, she has nothing to console herself with as she grows older. Therefore, the poem suggests, it is not worth loving, for love brings not comfort in memory, but a sense of loss in one’s old age.
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Line-by-Line Explanation & Analysis of “What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why (Sonnet 43)”
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Lines 1-2
What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why,
I have forgotten,"What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why" is an Italian sonnet. The first stanza of these kinds of sonnets establishes the speaker's "problem," which is traditionally the problem of love, particularly unrequited love.
The first line of the poem fulfills the reader's expectations for an Italian sonnet by bringing up the speaker's past experiences of love. The speaker wonders about the lips she has kissed, where she has kissed them, and the emotional reasons for kissing them. Note that "lips" here is an example of synecdoche, as these "lips" refer to the speaker's past lovers.
The alliteration of the /w/ sounds in line 1 force the reader to slow down and focus on these questions of "what," "where," and "why" that the speaker is asking. The repetition of the coordinating conjunction of "and"—an example of polysyndeton—further slows down the reading of the line, as does the end-stop at the end of line 1. The end-stop enhances the surprise of line 2, the beginning of which transforms line 1 from a series of questions to a declaration—there will never be an answer to these questions of "what," "where," and "why."
In the beginning of the second line, the speaker declares she has forgotten all her previous experiences of love. Thus, in a departure from traditional Italian sonnets, the speaker's problem is not that she is experiencing unrequited love; rather, it is that she has forgotten all her loves of the past. The caesura after "forgotten" creates a brusque ending to the phrase "I have forgotten," reflecting the harshness of the sentiment. The caesura also emphasizes the importance of the phrase by setting it apart from other words in the line.
The use of synecdoche in using "lips" to refer to the speaker's lovers heightens the speaker's sense of detachment from her memories. These lips are disembodied and unattached to individual faces, names, or bodies. They tease the speaker's memory, but provide no real information or context. All they can accomplish is remind the speaker of the meaningful, pleasurable, and comforting memories she has lost. Furthermore, the use of diacope in the repetition of the word "lips" heightens focus on the imagery of the lips--a reminder for the speaker of what she once had and now has lost. The repetition of the coordinating conjunction of "and"--an example of polysyndeton--further slows down the reading of the line.
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Lines 2-3
and what arms have lain
Under my head till morning; -
Lines 3-5
but the rain
Is full of ghosts tonight, that tap and sigh
Upon the glass and listen for reply, -
Lines 6-8
And in my heart there stirs a quiet pain
For unremembered lads that not again
Will turn to me at midnight with a cry. -
Lines 9-11
Thus in the winter stands the lonely tree,
Nor knows what birds have vanished one by one,
Yet knows its boughs more silent than before: -
Line 12
I cannot say what loves have come and gone,
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Lines 13-14
I only know that summer sang in me
A little while, that in me sings no more.
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“What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why (Sonnet 43)” Symbols
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Ghosts
The appearance of ghosts can often evoke fear, sorrow, and pain in the viewer. They are symbols of death and of the past, as well as reminders of what one has lost. In "What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why," ghosts symbolize the speaker's memories of love and her past lovers.
The speaker hears ghosts in the rain outside her window. Moreover, these ghosts are "tap[ping]" upon her window glass and waiting for her "reply." The ghosts represent the speaker's relationship and attitude toward her past memories and lovers. They want the speaker to acknowledge them. However, the speaker, who has forgotten her memories of the past, is unable to recognize them. She can only listen to their incessant tapping and sighing. Thus, these ghosts do not evoke happy emotions, but rather painful and sorrowful ones. To the speaker, they represent the past that she has lost and the happiness she can never regain.
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The Tree
A tree full of leaves and branches is often a symbol of life and possibility. Therefore, a barren tree in the midst of winter can symbolize death and loss. In "What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why," the speaker compares herself to a "lonely tree" in "winter." The tree that appears in the poem symbolizes the speaker's current state that is devoid of love and full of loss.
The tree once kept company with the birds who nested in its branches, just as the speaker once kept company with various lovers over the years. However, the birds "have vanished" just as the speaker's lovers have all vanished "one by one." Moreover, though the tree enjoyed the company of the birds, the departure of the birds leaves the tree "more silent than before." Therefore, the poem implies, the departure of the speaker's lovers and the loss of her memories of their love leave the speaker more pained than if she had never loved in the first place. Because the speaker loved in the past, the poem radically suggests, the speaker is worse off now as she is left with only pain and loss.
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Seasons
Winter evokes images of barren and dark landscapes filled with ice and snow. Plants do not flourish and animals are rarely seen. Winter thus is often a season traditionally associated with death, loss, and emptiness. In contrast, summer is full of life in the midst of blossoming. Many plants and animals thrive in the summer, and the days are long and full of sunlight. Summer, therefore, is typically associated with life, joy, and rebirth.
In "What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why," the speaker progresses from a state of "summer" to "winter" as she ages and forgets her memories of love. This progression not only marks the progression of time but also reflects the speaker's inner emotional state from the joy of experiencing love in her youth to the pain of losing her memories of love in her older age. The speaker does not seem to have any hope that she will return to a state of summer. As winter is also the last season of the calendar year, the poem suggests the speaker will live out the rest of her days in this emotional state of "winter."
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“What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why (Sonnet 43)” Poetic Devices & Figurative Language
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Metaphor
Millay uses metaphor once in "What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why" to intensify the speaker's state of mind by reflecting the speaker's mood upon the world around her.
In lines 3-5, the speaker listens to the rain outside her window. She compares the sound of the raindrops falling against on her window to the sound of ghosts "tap[ping]" and "sigh[ing]" on the glass. Ghosts are associated with feelings of loss, pain, nostalgia for the past, and sorrow. As the speaker is currently mourning the loss of her memories of love, she is consequently feeling loss, pain, nostalgia for the past, and sorrow. It is no wonder, then, that the sound of the raindrops seems to the speaker more like the sound of ghosts instead.
Moreover, in this metaphor, the ghosts demand the speaker's attention ("tap and sigh") and wait for her "reply." The ghosts are symbolic of what the speaker has lost—namely her past lovers and memories of love. Yet though they demand her attention, the speaker is unable to remember her past lovers or her memories of love. Thus, these ghosts do not comfort the speaker with their presence. They serve only as reminders of what she has lost and can never regain.
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Imagery
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Repetition
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Caesura
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Enjambment
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Alliteration
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Consonance
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Personification
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Synecdoche
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Assonance
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"What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why (Sonnet 43)" Vocabulary
Select any word below to get its definition in the context of the poem. The words are listed in the order in which they appear in the poem.
- Lain
- Unremembered
- Lads
- Boughs
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Past participle of lie, meaning to rest on a surface. Here, the speaker wonders what arms have rested beneath her head. In other words, whose arms she has rested her head upon.
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Form, Meter, & Rhyme Scheme of “What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why (Sonnet 43)”
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Form
"What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why" is an Italian sonnet (also known as a Petrarchan sonnet). The poem strictly follows the structure of an Italian sonnet with its fourteen lines and two stanzas. As with all Italian sonnets, the first stanza is an octave made of two quatrains. The second stanza is a sestet made of two tercets.
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Octave
- Quatrain
- Quatrain
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Sestet
- Tercet
- Tercet
In Italian sonnets, the octave presents the "proposition" or problem of the poem. Traditionally, the problem for the speaker is unrequited love. The sestet, on the other hand, provides the resolution to the problem.
Because "What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why" follows the form of Italian sonnets so strictly, its departure from the traditional content of Italian sonnets is all the more surprising. The problem of the poem is not unrequited love; the speaker has experienced love and lovers in the past. The problem, rather, is the speaker's loss of her memories of love. As she is tormented by this loss, the speaker experiences pain and heartache. In the sestet, the poem suggests that the only solution to this pain is if the speaker had not loved at all in the first place. This message is a radical departure from traditional Italian sonnets for its repudiation and questioning of the worth of love.
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Octave
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Meter
"What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why" is an Italian sonnet. As such, it uses the meter iambic pentameter strictly throughout all its lines. Each line thus contains five unstressed-stressed pairs of syllables. Take the first line, for example:
What lips my lips have kissed, and where and why,
The speaker in "What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why" lies in her bed at night, listening to the rain outside her window. As the poem is written in the form of the speaker's informal musings, iambic meter, which closely evokes the natural rhythms of speech is a fitting choice.
The only meaningful deviation from the regular iambic meter is in the beginning of line 9:
Thus in the winter stands the lonely tree,
The deviation marks the turn of the sonnet, which is traditionally placed at the beginning of the sestet. The turn typically marks a turn in mood or tone and a shift from the poem's problem to resolution. In "What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why," there is a shift in tone and point-of-view, as lines 9-11 are described from the point-of-view from an imagined omniscient narrator who observes the "lonely tree." Therefore, Millay further highlights the turn of her sonnet with the deviation in meter.
Additionally, the regular meter provides contrast with caesuras used within lines. The pauses set apart and highlight the importance of particular phrases. For example, in line 2, the commas after "forgotten" sets apart the phrase "I have forgotten." This declaration is a surprising conclusion to the first line, turning the questions in line 1 into a declaration of the speaker's failure to remember. The declaration "I have forgotten" is critical to the poem, as it sets up the sonnet's overarching problem. The rhythm and meter thus emphasize its importance as one of the poem's main ideas.
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Rhyme Scheme
"What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why" is written in the form of an Italian sonnet. The poem follows the standard rhyme scheme of such a sonnet accordingly, which is as follows:
ABBAABBA CDEDCE
Although Millay never deviates from the traditional rhyme scheme of Italian sonnets, she creates musical variation within and across lines through assonance and repetition. Take, for example, the assonance across line 4 and 8, which are both the last lines of each quatrain:
Is full of ghosts tonight, that tap and sigh
and
Will turn to me at midnight with a cry.
The shared sounds here closely associate the imagery and meanings of these two lines. The speaker currently is lying in bed at night ("tonight") while thinking of her past romantic encounters which also occurred at night ("midnight"). However, their temporal similarities only serve to highlight the contrast between the speaker's current and past situations. Now, the speaker is alone, without even her memories to comfort her. In the past, the speaker had companions and lovers beside her. The loneliness and pain the speaker feels is highlighted through this contrast.
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“What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why (Sonnet 43)” Speaker
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The speaker of "What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why" is an older woman who once had many lovers in her youth. While it’s possible that Millay herself is the speaker, this is by no means certain. Regardless, the speaker does not remember any of her previous lovers, their individual characteristics, or her feelings toward them. As she grows older, the speaker loses these cherished memories and feels a “quiet pain” at their loss. She is tormented by the thought of these "unremembered" lovers, but can do nothing about it.
The speaker's tormented state continues in the second stanza where the speaker compares herself to a "lonely tree" in "winter." Just as the tree is "more silent" after the loss of the birds in its branches, so too is the speaker more pained after the loss of her memories of her lovers. Thus, the speaker, after reflecting on her torment, comes to the conclusion that all her former experiences of love in the past during a metaphorical state of "summer" have only brought her more pain in the present. By the end of the poem, the speaker seems filled with regret that she had ever loved at all.
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“What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why (Sonnet 43)” Setting
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The setting of "What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why" is inside the speaker's house. The poem seems to suggest the speaker is in her bedroom, perhaps lying in bed, as it is nighttime. However, it is not clear where the speaker is, only that she is inside.
Nevertheless, the speaker is listening to the rain outside her window as she reflects on the pain of losing her memories. The raindrops are coming down hard, hard enough to tap on the glass. The sound of the rainstorm is relentless, and heightens the speaker's sense of pain and loss in losing her memories of love.
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Literary and Historical Context of “What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why (Sonnet 43)”
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Literary Context
"What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why" was first published in 1920 in the popular magazine Vanity Fair. Earlier that year, Millay had published her second collection of poems titled A Few Figs From Thistles: Poems and Four Sonnets. The collection caused a stir with its unabashed exploration of female sexuality and set the tone for much of Millay's later work to come. Although she had not yet achieved the level of fame her Pulitzer Prize would bring in 1923, Millay at this point had already received a healthy amount of recognition for her writing.
Millay wrote "What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why" during a critical period of the women's rights movement in the United States, and at the time when many women writers were rising into prominence. The concept of the "new woman"—a reference to a feminist ideal of an independent and empowered woman—greatly influenced the art and literature of this period. A prominent example of a work exploring this concept of a "new woman" and female sexuality is The Awakening, published by fellow American author Kate Chopin 21 years earlier.
Like her contemporary feminist writers, Millay was interested in exploring female interiority and perspectives in defiance of a long tradition and history of work written by and for men. Her work and attitude influenced many women writers following her, including, notably, Pulitzer-Prize winning author and poet Mary Oliver who even lived for a short while in Millay's home.
Historical Context
The 19th amendment was ratified on August 18, 1920, granting American women the right to vote. It was a historic victory for women's rights in America and the result of great effort during the women's rights movement of the 19th and early 20th centuries. While Millay was writing "What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why," there was great debate all around her regarding women's empowerment and the shape and form that would take in the present and future.
Women artists and writers during this time responded the debates around them, and many female writers rose to prominence during this time. For Millay, who eventually became the first women to receive the Pulitzer Prize for Poetry in 1923, sexual liberation and reclamation of female sexuality were ideas she explored in her writings. "What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why" is a prime example of this exploration and a subversion of Italian sonnets that historically were written by and for men. In her work, Millay's fearless exploration of female interiority paved the way for many feminist writers after her.
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More “What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why (Sonnet 43)” Resources
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External Resources
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Edna St. Vincent Millay's Life Story — A biography from the Poetry Foundation.
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The Italian Sonnet — A breakdown of the Italian—a.k.a. Petrarchan—sonnet, the form followed by Millay in this poem.
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The Poem Out Loud — Listen to a reading of the poem.
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A Musical Adaptation — Listen to the entire poem set to music.
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Love Letters — A look at Edna St. Vincent Millay's polyamorous love letters from the 1920s.
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LitCharts on Other Poems by Edna St. Vincent Millay
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