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All's Well That Ends Well

All's Well That Ends Well Translation Act 4, Scene 3

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Enter the two French Lords and some two or three Soldiers

FIRST LORD

You have not given him his mother's letter?

FIRST LORD

You haven't given him his mother's letter?

SECOND LORD

I have delivered it an hour since: there issomething in't that stings his nature; for on thereading it he changed almost into another man.

SECOND LORD

I delivered it an hour ago. There is something in it that upsets him. Upon reading it, he almost changed into a different man.

FIRST LORD

He has much worthy blame laid upon him for shakingoff so good a wife and so sweet a lady.

FIRST LORD

He deserves all the blame placed on him for getting rid of such a good wife and sweet lady.

SECOND LORD

Especially he hath incurred the everlasting displeasure of the king, who had even tuned his bounty to sing happiness to him. I will tell you a thing, but you shall let it dwell darkly with you.

SECOND LORD

Especially since he's earned the everlasting displeasure of the king, who had gone all out in his generosity to, and happiness for, him. I will tell you something, but you can't tell anyone.

FIRST LORD

When you have spoken it, 'tis dead, and I am thegrave of it.

FIRST LORD

When you've spoken it, it's dead, and it's buried in me.

SECOND LORD

He hath perverted a young gentlewoman here in Florence, of a most chaste renown; and this night he fleshes his will in the spoil of her honour: he hath given her his monumental ring, and thinks himself made in the unchaste composition.

SECOND LORD

He has seduced a young gentlewoman here in Florence, who has a very chaste reputation. This night he'll take her chastity. He's given her his ancestral ring, and he think he's definitely going to be successful in going through with it tonight.

FIRST LORD

Now, God delay our rebellion! as we are ourselves,what things are we!

FIRST LORD

Now, God protect us from our fleshly desires! Without God's help, what things we turn out to be!

SECOND LORD

Merely our own traitors. And as in the common course of all treasons, we still see them reveal themselves, till they attain to their abhorred ends, so he that in this action contrives against his own nobility, in his proper stream o'erflows himself.

SECOND LORD

Just traitors to ourselves. And, as with most acts of treason, we always see the perpetrators reveal their true natures, until they achieve their horrific goals. In acting against his own proper noble behavior, he'll ruin himself and give himself away by talking about it. 

FIRST LORD

Is it not meant damnable in us, to be trumpeters ofour unlawful intents? We shall not then have hiscompany to-night?

FIRST LORD

Isn't it supposed to be sinful to go around proclaiming our immoral desires? We won't have his company tonight then?

SECOND LORD

Not till after midnight; for he is dieted to his hour.

SECOND LORD

Not till after midnight. He only gets one hour.

FIRST LORD

That approaches apace; I would gladly have him see his company anatomized, that he might take a measure of his own judgments, wherein so curiously he had set this counterfeit.

FIRST LORD

That's coming soon. I would gladly have him see his companion under interrogation so he could make his own judgements since he's had so much faith in this liar.

SECOND LORD

We will not meddle with him till he come; for hispresence must be the whip of the other.

SECOND LORD

We won't bother with Parolles till Bertram comes. We'll start working on him when Bertram shows up.

FIRST LORD

In the mean time, what hear you of these wars?

FIRST LORD

In the meantime, what have you heard of these wars?

SECOND LORD

I hear there is an overture of peace.

SECOND LORD

I've heard there's been a start to peace talks.

FIRST LORD

Nay, I assure you, a peace concluded.

FIRST LORD

No, I assure you, peace has been made.

SECOND LORD

What will Count Rousillon do then? will he travelhigher, or return again into France?

SECOND LORD

What will Count Rousillon do then? Will he travel onwards, or go back to France?

FIRST LORD

I perceive, by this demand, you are not altogetherof his council.

FIRST LORD

I gather, by this question, that you're not a close confidant of his.

SECOND LORD

Let it be forbid, sir; so should I be a great dealof his act.

SECOND LORD

God forbid, sir. If I were, I'd be accountable for his actions.

FIRST LORD

Sir, his wife some two months since fled from his house: her pretence is a pilgrimage to Saint Jaques le Grand; which holy undertaking with most austere sanctimony she accomplished; and, there residing the tenderness of her nature became as a prey to her grief; in fine, made a groan of her last breath, and now she sings in heaven.

FIRST LORD

Sir, his wife fled two months ago from his house. She said she was going on a pilgrimage to Saint Jaques le Grand and she completed that holy task with impressive piety. And, while she was there, her grief overcame the tenderness in her nature. In short, her last breath became a groan, and now she sings in heaven.

SECOND LORD

How is this justified?

SECOND LORD

What proof is there?

FIRST LORD

The stronger part of it by her own letters, which makes her story true, even to the point of her death: her death itself, which could not be her office to say is come, was faithfully confirmed by the rector of the place.

FIRST LORD

Most of the proof is in her own letters, which shows her story to be true right up to her death. Her death itself, which she couldn't herself have announced, was faithfully confirmed by the rector where she was staying.

SECOND LORD

Hath the count all this intelligence?

SECOND LORD

Does the count have this information?

FIRST LORD

Ay, and the particular confirmations, point frompoint, so to the full arming of the verity.

FIRST LORD

Yes, and the specific confirmations, point by point, so all the evidence showing it to be true.

SECOND LORD

I am heartily sorry that he'll be glad of this.

SECOND LORD

I am very sorry that this news will have made him glad.

FIRST LORD

How mightily sometimes we make us comforts of our losses!

FIRST LORD

Sometimes we mightily make comforts out of our losses!

SECOND LORD

And how mightily some other times we drown our gain in tears! The great dignity that his valour hath here acquired for him shall at home be encountered with a shame as ample.

SECOND LORD

And some other times we mightily drown the positives in tears! All the great respect that his bravery has earned him here will be matched by an equal shame at home.

FIRST LORD

The web of our life is of a mingled yarn, good and ill together: our virtues would be proud, if our faults whipped them not; and our crimes would despair, if they were not cherished by our virtues.

FIRST LORD

The web of our life is like tangled yarn, good and bad together. Our virtues would become too proud if our faults didn't attack them, and our crimes would fall into despair if they weren't embraced by your virtues.

Enter a Messenger

FIRST LORD

How now! where's your master?

FIRST LORD

What's going on? Where's your master?

SERVANT

He met the duke in the street, sir, of whom he hath taken a solemn leave: his lordship will next morning for France. The duke hath offered him letters of commendations to the king.

SERVANT

He met the duke in the street, sir, and he's said farewell to him. His lordship will leave tomorrow morning for France. The duke has offered him letters of praise addressed to the king.

SECOND LORD

They shall be no more than needful there, if theywere more than they can commend.

SECOND LORD

Those will definitely be necessary even if they're full of more praise than he deserves.

FIRST LORD

They cannot be too sweet for the king's tartness.Here's his lordship now.

FIRST LORD

They can't be sweet enough for the king's displeasure. Here's his lordship now.

Enter BERTRAM

FIRST LORD

How now, my lord! is't not after midnight?

FIRST LORD

How's it going, my lord? Isn't it after midnight?

BERTRAM

I have to-night dispatched sixteen businesses, a month's length a-piece, by an abstract of success: I have congeed with the duke, done my adieu with his nearest; buried a wife, mourned for her; writ to my lady mother I am returning; entertained my convoy; and between these main parcels of dispatch effected many nicer needs; the last was the greatest, but that I have not ended yet.

BERTRAM

Tonight I've taken care of sixteen different things, a month's worth of tasks, with total success: I've taken leave of the duke, said goodbye to his nearest and dearest. I've buried a wife and mourned for her. I've written to my mother that I'm returning home. I've entertained my followers. And between these main things I had to get done, I've met many more pleasurable needs. The last was the most significant, but I haven't ended that yet. 

SECOND LORD

If the business be of any difficulty, and thismorning your departure hence, it requires haste ofyour lordship.

SECOND LORD

If this business is at all difficult, and you're leaving this morning, your lordship had better hurry up.

BERTRAM

I mean, the business is not ended, as fearing to hear of it hereafter. But shall we have this dialogue between the fool and the soldier? Come, bring forth this counterfeit module, he has deceived me, like a double-meaning prophesier.

BERTRAM

I mean, the business is not ended, as in I'm afraid word will get out later. But shall we hear this dialogue between the fool and the soldier? Come, bring for this lying rogue, he has deceived me, like a fortune-teller who speaks in double meanings.

SECOND LORD

Bring him forth: has sat i' the stocks all night,poor gallant knave.

SECOND LORD

Bring him forth. He has sat in the stocks all night, poor foppish rogue.

BERTRAM

No matter: his heels have deserved it, in usurpinghis spurs so long. How does he carry himself?

BERTRAM

No matter: his heels have deserved the discomfort for pretending to be brave for so long. How does he behave himself?

SECOND LORD

I have told your lordship already, the stocks carry him. But to answer you as you would be understood; he weeps like a wench that had shed her milk: he hath confessed himself to Morgan, whom he supposes to be a friar, from the time of his remembrance to this very instant disaster of his setting i' the stocks: and what think you he hath confessed?

SECOND LORD

I've told your lordship already, he behaves like a coward. But to answer you more specifically, he weeps like a young woman that had spilled her milk. He has given confession to Morgan, who he believes to be a friar, from as far back as he can remember to the very instant he was placed in the stocks. And what do you think he has confessed?

BERTRAM

Nothing of me, has a'?

BERTRAM

Nothing of me, has he?

SECOND LORD

His confession is taken, and it shall be read to hisface: if your lordship be in't, as I believe youare, you must have the patience to hear it.

SECOND LORD

His confession is taken, and it will be read to his face. If your lordship is in it, as I believe you are, you must have the patience to listen to it.

Enter PAROLLES guarded, and First Soldier

BERTRAM

A plague upon him! muffled! he can say nothing ofme: hush, hush!

BERTRAM

A plague on him! I wish his mouth were covered! He can say nothing about me: hush, hush!

FIRST LORD

Hoodman comes! Portotartarosa

FIRST LORD

The blindfolded man comes! Portotartarosa.

FIRST SOLDIER

He calls for the tortures: what will you saywithout 'em?

FIRST SOLDIER

He calls for the tortures to begin. What will you say without their help?

PAROLLES

I will confess what I know without constraint: ifye pinch me like a pasty, I can say no more.

PAROLLES

I will confess what I know without constraint. If you pinch me until I'm a pie, I'd have nothing more to add.

FIRST SOLDIER

Bosko chimurcho.

FIRST SOLDIER

Bosko chimurcho.

FIRST LORD

Boblibindo chicurmurco.

FIRST LORD

Boblibindo chicurmurco.

FIRST SOLDIER

You are a merciful general. Our general bids youanswer to what I shall ask you out of a note.

FIRST SOLDIER

You are a merciful general. Our general commands you answer to what I shall ask you from this piece of paper.

PAROLLES

And truly, as I hope to live.

PAROLLES

And I'll answer truly, as truly as I hope to live.

FIRST SOLDIER

[Reads] 'First demand of him how many horse theduke is strong.' What say you to that?

FIRST SOLDIER

[Reading] "First, ask him how many horses are in the duke's army." What do you say to that?

PAROLLES

Five or six thousand; but very weak and unserviceable: the troops are all scattered, and the commanders very poor rogues, upon my reputation and credit and as I hope to live.

PAROLLES

Five or six thousand, but they're very weak and unready for battle. The troops are all scattered, and the commanders are weak scoundrels. I swear upon my reputation and credit and my life.

FIRST SOLDIER

Shall I set down your answer so?

FIRST SOLDIER

Should I write that down as your answer?

PAROLLES

Do: I'll take the sacrament on't, how and which way youwill.

PAROLLES

Do so. I'll take the sacrament on that, however and whichever way you want me to.

BERTRAM

All's one to him. What a past-saving slave is this!

BERTRAM

[So only the Lords can hear] It's all the same to him. This slave is beyond saving!

FIRST LORD

You're deceived, my lord: this is Monsieur Parolles, the gallant militarist,—that was his own phrase,— that had the whole theoric of war in the knot of his scarf, and the practise in the chape of his dagger.

FIRST LORD

[So only BERTRAM can hear] You're deceived, my lord. This is Monsieur Parolles, the "gallant militarist"—that was his own phrase—that knew the whole theory of war like the knot in his scarf, and had the strategies of war in the sheath of his dagger.

SECOND LORD

I will never trust a man again for keeping his swordclean. Nor believe he can have every thing in himby wearing his apparel neatly.

SECOND LORD

[So only BERTRAM can hear] I will never trust a man again for keeping his sword clean. Nor will I believe he can be a great man just because he wears his uniform neatly.

FIRST SOLDIER

Well, that's set down.

FIRST SOLDIER

[To PAROLLES] Well, that's written down.

PAROLLES

Five or six thousand horse, I said,— I will saytrue,—or thereabouts, set down, for I'll speak truth.

PAROLLES

Five or six thousand horses, I said—I will tell the truth—or thereabouts. Write it down, for I'll say the truth.

FIRST LORD

He's very near the truth in this.

FIRST LORD

[So only BERTRAM can hear] He is very near the truth in this.

BERTRAM

But I con him no thanks for't, in the nature hedelivers it.

BERTRAM

[So only the Lords can hear] But I'll give him no thanks for it, given the situation in which he delivers it.

PAROLLES

Poor rogues, I pray you, say.

PAROLLES

Poor scoundrels, please, say something.

FIRST SOLDIER

Well, that's set down.

FIRST SOLDIER

Well, that's written down.

PAROLLES

I humbly thank you, sir: a truth's a truth, therogues are marvellous poor.

PAROLLES

I humbly thank you, sir. A truth is a truth. The rogues are incredibly weak.

FIRST SOLDIER

[Reads] 'Demand of him, of what strength they area-foot.' What say you to that?

FIRST SOLDIER

[Reading] "Demand of him how strong they are on foot." What do you say to that?

PAROLLES

By my troth, sir, if I were to live this present hour, I will tell true. Let me see: Spurio, a hundred and fifty; Sebastian, so many; Corambus, so many; Jaques, so many; Guiltian, Cosmo, Lodowick, and Gratii, two hundred and fifty each; mine own company, Chitopher, Vaumond, Bentii, two hundred and fifty each: so that the muster-file, rotten and sound, upon my life, amounts not to fifteen thousand poll; half of the which dare not shake snow from off their cassocks, lest they shake themselves to pieces.

PAROLLES

I swear, sir, if I were to die this hour, I would tell the truth. Let me see: Spurio has a hundred and fifty. Sebastian, the same number. Corambus, the same number. Jaques, the same number. Guiltian, Cosmo, Lodowick, and Gratii, two hundred and fifty each. My own company, Chitopher, Vaumond, Bentii, two hundred and fifteen each. So the whole army, useless or in good shape, upon my life, comes up not even to fifteen thousand people, half of which wouldn't even dare to shake snow off their boots, they're so afraid they'd shake themselves to pieces.

BERTRAM

What shall be done to him?

BERTRAM

[So only the Lords can hear] What shall be done to him?

FIRST LORD

Nothing, but let him have thanks. Demand of him mycondition, and what credit I have with the duke.

FIRST LORD

[So only BERTRAM can hear] Nothing, just thank him.

[To the FIRST SOLDIER] Demand from him what he thinks of my qualities and what the Duke thinks of me.

FIRST SOLDIER

Well, that's set down.

[Reads]

'You shall demand of him, whether one Captain Dumain
be i' the camp, a Frenchman; what his reputation is
with the duke; what his valour, honesty, and
expertness in wars; or whether he thinks it were not
possible, with well-weighing sums of gold, to
corrupt him to revolt.' What say you to this? what
do you know of it?

FIRST SOLDIER

Well, that's written down. 

[Reading] "You shall demand from him whether one Captain Dumain is in the camp, a Frenchman. What his reputation is with the duke, his bravery, honesty, and expertise in wars, and whether the prisoner thinks it would not be possible, with high sums of gold, to corrupt the captain to revolt." What do you say to this? What do you know of it?

PAROLLES

I beseech you, let me answer to the particular ofthe inter'gatories: demand them singly.

PAROLLES

I plead with you, let me answer to each particular question. Ask them one at a time.

FIRST SOLDIER

Do you know this Captain Dumain?

FIRST SOLDIER

Do you know this Captian Dumain?

PAROLLES

I know him: a' was a botcher's 'prentice in Paris, from whence he was whipped for getting the shrieve's fool with child, —a dumb innocent, that could not say him nay.

PAROLLES

I know him. He was a tailor's apprentice in Paris and he was whipped out of the city for getting a girl pregnant—an innocent mute girl that could not say no to him. 

BERTRAM

Nay, by your leave, hold your hands; though I knowhis brains are forfeit to the next tile that falls.

BERTRAM

No, hold on, resist fighting him, even though I know you'll smash his brains out at the nearest opportunity. 

FIRST SOLDIER

Well, is this captain in the duke of Florence's camp?

FIRST SOLDIER

Well, is this captain in the Duke of Florence's camp?

PAROLLES

Upon my knowledge, he is, and lousy.

PAROLLES

As far as I know he is, and he's lousy. 

FIRST LORD

Nay look not so upon me; we shall hear of yourlordship anon.

FIRST LORD

[So only BERTRAM can hear] Don't look at me like that. We'll hear about your lordship soon enough. 

FIRST SOLDIER

What is his reputation with the duke?

FIRST SOLDIER

What's his reputation with the Duke?

PAROLLES

The duke knows him for no other but a poor officerof mine; and writ to me this other day to turn himout o' the band: I think I have his letter in my pocket.

PAROLLES

The Duke knows him to be a poor officer in my charge. He wrote me the other day to throw him out of the army. I think I have his letter in my pocket. 

FIRST SOLDIER

Marry, we'll search.

FIRST SOLDIER

Okay, we'll search. 

PAROLLES

In good sadness, I do not know; either it is there,or it is upon a file with the duke's other lettersin my tent.

PAROLLES

Sad to say, I'm not sure. Either it is there or maybe it is in a file with the duke's other letters in my tent. 

FIRST SOLDIER

Here 'tis; here's a paper: shall I read it to you?

FIRST SOLDIER

Here it is. Here's a paper. Should I read it to you?

PAROLLES

I do not know if it be it or no.

PAROLLES

I don't know if that's it or not. 

BERTRAM

Our interpreter does it well.

BERTRAM

Our interpreter's good at this. 

FIRST LORD

Excellently.

FIRST LORD

He's excellent. 

FIRST SOLDIER

[Reads] 'Dian, the count's a fool, and full of gold,'—

FIRST SOLDIER

[Reading] "Diana, the count's a fool, and only very rich,"—

PAROLLES

That is not the duke's letter, sir; that is an advertisement to a proper maid in Florence, one Diana, to take heed of the allurement of one Count Rousillon, a foolish idle boy, but for all that very ruttish: I pray you, sir, put it up again.

PAROLLES

That's not the duke's letter, sir. That's a message to a very admirable lady in Florence, one Diana, to watch out for the seduction of the Count Rousillon, a foolish, lazy boy but, despite that, also very lecherous. I beg you, sir, put the letter back again.  

FIRST SOLDIER

Nay, I'll read it first, by your favour.

FIRST SOLDIER

No, I'll read it first, if you don't mind. 

PAROLLES

My meaning in't, I protest, was very honest in the behalf of the maid; for I knew the young count to be a dangerous and lascivious boy, who is a whale to virginity and devours up all the fry it finds.

PAROLLES

My meaning in it, if I can explain, was very honest on behalf of the maid. Because I knew the young count was a dangerous and lustful boy, who is like a whale that feeds on virginity and devours up all the virgins it can find. 

BERTRAM

Damnable both-sides rogue!

BERTRAM

[To himself] Damned two-timing rogue! 

FIRST SOLDIER

[Reads] 'When he swears oaths, bid him drop gold, and take it; After he scores, he never pays the score: Half won is match well made; match, and well make it; He ne'er pays after-debts, take it before; And say a soldier, Dian, told thee this, Men are to mell with, boys are not to kiss: For count of this, the count's a fool, I know it, Who pays before, but not when he does owe it. Thine, as he vowed to thee in thine ear, PAROLLES.'

FIRST SOLDIER

[Reading] "When he makes vows to you, tell him to give you gold and then take it. After he gets what he wants, he never pays what he owes. You've already done half the work if you can make a good deal with him. Make a match of it, and take what you can get first. He never pays afterwards, take it before. And say that a soldier told you this, Diana. You can mess around with men, but don't kiss boys. To wrap things up, the count's a fool, I know that to be true. He pays to get what he wants but not if he owes it after he's gotten what he's after. Yours, just like vowed to be yours in your ear, Parolles."

BERTRAM

He shall be whipped through the army with this rhymein's forehead.

BERTRAM

[So only the Lords can hear] He'll be whipped throughout the army with this rhyme stuck in his forehead. 

SECOND LORD

This is your devoted friend, sir, the manifoldlinguist and the armipotent soldier.

SECOND LORD

[So only BERTRAM can hear] This is supposedly your devoted friend, sir, who speaks so many languages and is such a brave soldier. 

BERTRAM

I could endure any thing before but a cat, and nowhe's a cat to me.

BERTRAM

[So only the Lords can hear] I used to be able to tolerate anything except a cat and now this man is like a cat to me. 

FIRST SOLDIER

I perceive, sir, by the general's looks, we shall befain to hang you.

FIRST SOLDIER

I see, sir, based on the general's expression, we'll have to hang you. 

PAROLLES

My life, sir, in any case: not that I am afraid to die; but that, my offences being many, I would repent out the remainder of nature: let me live, sir, in a dungeon, i' the stocks, or any where, so I may live.

PAROLLES

Give me my life, sir, at least. It's not that I'm afraid to die. It's just that since I've committed so many sins, I'd rather live out the rest of my life being repentant. Let me live, sir, in a dungeon or in the stocks or anywhere just so I may live. 

FIRST SOLDIER

We'll see what may be done, so you confess freely; therefore, once more to this Captain Dumain: you have answered to his reputation with the duke and to his valour: what is his honesty?

FIRST SOLDIER

We'll see what may done as long as you confess truthfully. Therefore, let's go back to this Captain Dumain. You've talked about his reputation with the duke and about his bravery. What about his honesty?

PAROLLES

He will steal, sir, an egg out of a cloister: for rapes and ravishments he parallels Nessus: he professes not keeping of oaths; in breaking 'em he is stronger than Hercules: he will lie, sir, with such volubility, that you would think truth were a fool: drunkenness is his best virtue, for he will be swine-drunk; and in his sleep he does little harm, save to his bed-clothes about him; but they know his conditions and lay him in straw. I have but little more to say, sir, of his honesty: he has every thing that an honest man should not have; what an honest man should have, he has nothing.

PAROLLES

He will steal an egg out of a church, sir. In terms of raping and ravishing, he's as bad as Nessus. He doesn't ever keep his oaths. He's stronger than Hercules when it comes to breaking his oaths. Sir, his lies are so versatile that you'd think truth was just a fool. Drunkenness is his best virtue for he tends to get blackout drunk, and in his sleep he doesn't do any harm (except to his bedsheets). His servants know his behaviors, though, and they lay him down to sleep in straw. I don't have much more to say about his honesty, sir. He has every quality than an honest man should not have and no qualities that an honest man should. 

FIRST LORD

I begin to love him for this.

FIRST LORD

[So only BERTRAM can hear] I'm starting to find this endearing. 

BERTRAM

For this description of thine honesty? A pox uponhim for me, he's more and more a cat.

BERTRAM

[So only the FIRST LORD can hear] Because of this description of your honesty? A curse on him, I say. He's more and more like a cat. 

FIRST SOLDIER

What say you to his expertness in war?

FIRST SOLDIER

What do you have to say about his expertise in war?

PAROLLES

Faith, sir, he has led the drum before the English tragedians; to belie him, I will not, and more of his soldiership I know not; except, in that country he had the honour to be the officer at a place there called Mile-end, to instruct for the doubling of files: I would do the man what honour I can, but of this I am not certain.

PAROLLES

Well, sir, he's just an actor when it comes to being in the war. I won't tell lies about him and I don't know very much about him as a a soldier. Except that I do know that in that country he had the honor to be the officer in charge at a place called Mile-end and his job was to instruct during the doubling of files drill. I would say whatever honorable things about him I could, but I don't know very much. 

FIRST LORD

He hath out-villained villany so far, that therarity redeems him.

FIRST LORD

[So only BERTRAM can hear] He's out-villained villainy so far, but this nice gesture is redeeming. 

BERTRAM

A pox on him, he's a cat still.

BERTRAM

[So only the FIRST LORD can hear] Curse him, he's still a cat. 

FIRST SOLDIER

His qualities being at this poor price, I need notto ask you if gold will corrupt him to revolt.

FIRST SOLDIER

Given that you've rated his qualities so poorly, I don't need to waste time asking you if he could be bribed with gold to revolt. 

PAROLLES

Sir, for a quart d'ecu he will sell the fee-simple of his salvation, the inheritance of it; and cut the entail from all remainders, and a perpetual succession for it perpetually.

PAROLLES

Sir, for just a silver coin, he'd sell all his chances at being saved and his heirs' chances too. He'd cast off his salvation and his descendants' salvation forever. 

FIRST SOLDIER

What's his brother, the other Captain Dumain?

FIRST SOLDIER

What's his brother like, the other Captain Dumain?

SECOND LORD

Why does he ask him of me?

SECOND LORD

[To himself] Why does he ask him about me?

FIRST SOLDIER

What's he?

FIRST SOLDIER

What's he like?

PAROLLES

E'en a crow o' the same nest; not altogether so great as the first in goodness, but greater a great deal in evil: he excels his brother for a coward, yet his brother is reputed one of the best that is: in a retreat he outruns any lackey; marry, in coming on he has the cramp.

PAROLLES

He's a crow from the same nest. He's not really as great as the first brother in terms of goodness, but he's a great deal greater in terms of evil. He's much more of a coward than his brother even though his brother is known as one of the biggest cowards there is. In running away, he outruns any man. Yes, and when the troop is advancing, he gets a cramp. 

FIRST SOLDIER

If your life be saved, will you undertake to betraythe Florentine?

FIRST SOLDIER

In order to save your life, will you be willing to betray the Florentine?

PAROLLES

Ay, and the captain of his horse, Count Rousillon.

PAROLLES

Yes, and the captain of his horse, Count Rousillon.

FIRST SOLDIER

I'll whisper with the general, and know his pleasure.

FIRST SOLDIER

I'll whisper with the general and find out what he wants. 

PAROLLES

[Aside] I'll no more drumming; a plague of all drums! Only to seem to deserve well, and to beguile the supposition of that lascivious young boy the count, have I run into this danger. Yet who would have suspected an ambush where I was taken?

PAROLLES

[To himself] I won't drum anymore. Curse all drums! I've only run into this danger because I wanted to seem courageous, and because I wanted to win over that lustful young boy, the count. But who would have suspected there would be an ambush in the play where I was?

FIRST SOLDIER

There is no remedy, sir, but you must die: the general says, you that have so traitorously discovered the secrets of your army and made such pestiferous reports of men very nobly held, can serve the world for no honest use; therefore you must die. Come, headsman, off with his head.

FIRST SOLDIER

There's no way out, sir, but you'll have to die. The general says that someone who has been such a traitor in sharing the secrets of his army and made such lying reports of men who are known to be noble can never serve the world for any honest purpose. Therefore you must die. Come, executioner, off with his head. 

PAROLLES

O Lord, sir, let me live, or let me see my death!

PAROLLES

Oh Lord, sir, let me live, or let me at least see my death! 

FIRST LORD

That shall you, and take your leave of all your friends.

FIRST LORD

Yes, you will do that, and say farewell to all your friends. 

Unblinding him

FIRST LORD

So, look about you: know you any here?

FIRST LORD

So, look around you. Do you know anyone here?

BERTRAM

Good morrow, noble captain.

BERTRAM

Good morning, noble captain. 

SECOND LORD

God bless you, Captain Parolles.

SECOND LORD

God bless you, Captain Parolles. 

FIRST LORD

God save you, noble captain.

FIRST LORD

God protect you, noble captain. 

SECOND LORD

Captain, what greeting will you to my Lord Lafeu?I am for France.

SECOND LORD

Captain, what greeting will you send to Lord Lafeu? I'm going to France. 

FIRST LORD

Good captain, will you give me a copy of the sonnet you writ to Diana in behalf of the Count Rousillon? an I were not a very coward, I'ld compel it of you: but fare you well.

FIRST LORD

Good captain, will you give me a copy of the sonnet that you wrote to Diana on behalf of the Count Rousillon? If I weren't a total coward, I'd demand it of you. But farewell. 

Exeunt BERTRAM and Lords

FIRST SOLDIER

You are undone, captain, all but your scarf; thathas a knot on't yet

FIRST SOLDIER

You are ruined, captain, all but your scarf. That still has a knot in it. 

PAROLLES

Who cannot be crushed with a plot?

PAROLLES

Who cannot be crushed by a plot against them?

FIRST SOLDIER

If you could find out a country where but women were that had received so much shame, you might begin an impudent nation. Fare ye well, sir; I am for France too: we shall speak of you there.

FIRST SOLDIER

If you could discover a country where only women were and all of them had been as shamed as you've been, maybe you could father a shameless nation. Farewell, sir. I'm heading for France too. We shall speak of you there. 

Exit with Soldiers

PAROLLES

Yet am I thankful: if my heart were great, 'Twould burst at this. Captain I'll be no more; But I will eat and drink, and sleep as soft As captain shall: simply the thing I am Shall make me live. Who knows himself a braggart, Let him fear this, for it will come to pass that every braggart shall be found an ass. Rust, sword; cool, blushes! and, Parolles, live Safest in shame! being fool'd, by foolery thrive! There's place and means for every man alive. I'll after them.

PAROLLES

Yet I'm thankful. If my heart were big, it would burst at this. I won't be a captain anymore. But I'll eat and drink and I'll sleep as softly as a captain does. Simply being what I am will keep me alive. If any man knows himself to be a braggart, let him be afraid of what's happened to me. It is sure to happen that every braggart shall be revealed to be an ass. My sword will rust and my blushes will fade and Parolles will live most safely in his shame! By being fooled, my foolery will help me survive! Every man can find a place and a way to live. I'll go after them. 

Exit

All s well that ends well
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Dan rubins
About the Translator: Dan Rubins

Dan Rubins is currently completing his MA in Shakespeare Studies from King's College London/Shakespeare's Globe and will be pursuing an MA in Elementary Inclusive Education from Teachers College, Columbia University. He holds a BA in English from Yale University. His Masters dissertation focuses on announcements of death in early modern drama, and other research areas of interest include Shakespeare in transformative contexts (prisons, schools, etc.) and rhyme in Shakespeare's dramatic texts. In addition to teaching and learning, he also writes theatre reviews (often of Shakespeare productions), composes musical theatre (frequently with Shakespearean inspirations), and sings in choirs (occasionally in Shakespearean choral settings).