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The Comedy of Errors

The Comedy of Errors Translation Act 4, Scene 1

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Enter SECOND MERCHANT, ANGELO and an OFFICER

SECOND MERCHANT

You know since Pentecost the sum is due, And since I have not much importuned you, Nor now I had not, but that I am bound To Persia, and want guilders for my voyage. Therefore make present satisfaction, Or I’ll attach you by this officer.

SECOND MERCHANT

You know the fee has been due since Pentecost. I haven't nagged you that much about it since then, and I don't want to now, but I'm leaving for Persia and I need the money for my voyage. Therefore, give me the money now, or I'll have you arrested by this officer. 

ANGELO

Even just the sum that I do owe to you Is growing to me by Antipholus. And in the instant that I met with you, He had of me a chain. At five o'clock I shall receive the money for the same. Pleaseth you walk with me down to his house, I will discharge my bond and thank you too.

ANGELO

Antipholus owes me exactly the amount that I owe you. Right before I met you today, he bought a chain from me. At five o'clock, I'll get the money for that. If you care to walk with me down to his house, I'll pay you what I owe you and give you thanks. 

Enter ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS and DROMIO OF EPHESUS from the COURTESAN'S house

COURTESAN'S OFFICER

That labor may you save. See where he comes.

COURTESAN'S OFFICER

You don't have to go far. Look, he's coming now. 

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

While I go to the goldsmith’s house, go thou And buy a rope’s end. That will I bestow Among my wife and her confederates For locking me out of my doors by day. But soft. I see the goldsmith. Get thee gone. Buy thou a rope, and bring it home to me.

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

[To DROMIO OF EPHESUS] While I go to the goldsmith's house, you go and buy a rope. I'll beat my wife and her accomplices with it for locking me out of my own house. But hush. I see the goldsmith. Get out of here. Buy the rope, and bring it back to me. 

DROMIO OF EPHESUS

I buy a thousand pound a year! I buy a rope!

DROMIO OF EPHESUS

First a thousand marks and now a rope! 

Exit DROMIO OF EPHESUS

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

[to ANGELO] A man is well holp up that trusts to you! I promisèd your presence and the chain, But neither chain nor goldsmith came to me. Belike you thought our love would last too long If it were chained together, and therefore came not.

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

[To ANGELO] A man is in good hands when he trusts you! I expected you to come with the chain, but I didn't see either or you or the chain. Maybe you thought we'd be too inseparable if we were chained together so you didn't bother to come. 

ANGELO

Saving your merry humor, here’s the note How much your chain weighs to the utmost carat, The fineness of the gold, and chargeful fashion, Which doth amount to three-odd ducats more Than I stand debted to this gentleman. I pray you, see him presently discharged, For he is bound to sea, and stays but for it.

ANGELO

I'm glad you're in such a jolly mood, and here's the bill for how much your chain weighs down to the last carat, the quality of the gold, and the cost, which comes to three and a bit ducats more than I owe this gentleman. Please, pay up, for he's going to sea and is only waiting for the money. 

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

I am not furnished with the present money. Besides, I have some business in the town. Good signior, take the stranger to my house, And with you take the chain, and bid my wife Disburse the sum on the receipt thereof. Perchance I will be there as soon as you.

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

I don't have the money right now. Besides, I have business to attend to in town. Good man, take the stranger to my house along with the chain, and ask my wife to pay the amount listed on the bill. Maybe I'll get there at the same time. 

ANGELO

Then you will bring the chain to her yourself.

ANGELO

Then you will bring the chain to her yourself. 

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

No, bear it with you lest I come not time enough.

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

No, you bring it in case I don't get there in time. 

ANGELO

Well, sir, I will. Have you the chain about you?

ANGELO

Well, sir, I will. Do you have the chain with you?

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

An if I have not, sir, I hope you have,Or else you may return without your money.

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

If I don't sir, I hope you do, or else you're not getting paid. 

ANGELO

Nay, come, I pray you, sir, give me the chain.Both wind and tide stays for this gentleman,And I, to blame, have held him here too long.

ANGELO

No, come on, please, sir, give me the chain. The wind and the tide are on hold for this gentleman, and I've kept him here too long. 

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

Good Lord! You use this dalliance to excuseYour breach of promise to the Porpentine.I should have chid you for not bringing it,But, like a shrew, you first begin to brawl.

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

Good Lord! You're stalling to make me forget that you didn't show up at the Porpentine as you'd promised. I should have laid into you for not bringing it, but, like a whiny brat, you start to fight first. 

SECOND MERCHANT

The hour steals on. I pray you, sir, dispatch.

SECOND MERCHANT

The clock is ticking. Please, sir, let's get moving. 

ANGELO

You hear how he importunes me. The chain!

ANGELO

You hear how he begs me! The chain! 

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

Why, give it to my wife, and fetch your money.

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

Just give it to my wife and get your money. 

ANGELO

Come, come. You know I gave it you even now.Either send the chain, or send me by some token.

ANGELO

Come on now. You know I just gave it to you. Either give me the chain, or give me something of yours to let your wife know to pay me. 

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

Fie, now you run this humor out of breath.Come, where’s the chain? I pray you, let me see it.

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

Really, now you're running this joke into the ground. Come on, where's the chain? I'm asking you, let me see it. 

SECOND MERCHANT

My business cannot brook this dalliance. [to ANTIPHOLUS] Good sir, say whe'er you’ll answer me or no.If not, I’ll leave him to the Officer.

SECOND MERCHANT

I really don't have time for this dilly-dallying.

[To ANTIPHOLUS] Good sir, tell me whether you'll pay me or not. If not, I'll have Angelo arrested. 

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

I answer you? What should I answer you?

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

I pay you? What should I pay you?

ANGELO

The money that you owe me for the chain.

ANGELO

The money that you owe me for the chain. 

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

I owe you none till I receive the chain.

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

I owe you nothing until I receive the chain. 

ANGELO

You know I gave it you half an hour since.

ANGELO

You know I gave it to you half an hour ago. 

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

You gave me none. You wrong me much to say so.

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

You gave me nothing. You do me wrong to say that. 

ANGELO

You wrong me more, sir, in denying it.Consider how it stands upon my credit.

ANGELO

You do me more wrong, sir, in lying about it. Think about what this does to my reputation. 

SECOND MERCHANT

Well, officer, arrest him at my suit.

SECOND MERCHANT

Well, officer, arrest him on my accusation. 

OFFICER

I do, [to ANGELO] and charge you in the Duke’s name to obey me.

OFFICER

I do, [To ANGELO], and I charge you in the Duke's name to obey me.

ANGELO

This touches me in reputation.Either consent to pay this sum for me,Or I attach you by this officer.

ANGELO

[To ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS] This damages my reputation. Either agree to pay me the money you owe, or I'll have you arrested by this officer. 

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

Consent to pay thee that I never had?—Arrest me, foolish fellow, if thou dar’st.

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

Agree to pay you for something I never got?

[To OFFICER] Arrest me, foolish fellow, if you dare. 

ANGELO

Here is thy fee. Arrest him, officer.I would not spare my brother in this caseIf he should scorn me so apparently.

ANGELO

Here's money to do it. Arrest him, officer. I'd have my brother arrested too, if he'd wronged me as obviously as this man has. 

OFFICER

I do arrest you, sir. You hear the suit.

OFFICER

I do arrest you, sir. You've heard the accusation. 

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

I do obey thee till I give thee bail.But, sirrah, you shall buy this sport as dearAs all the metal in your shop will answer.

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

I will obey you till I pay you bail.

[To ANGELO] But, sir, you'll pay for this, and it will cost you all the metal in your shop. 

ANGELO

Sir, sir, I will have law in Ephesus,To your notorious shame, I doubt it not.

ANGELO

Sir, I'll make sure I have justice and keep my rights in Ephesus, even if it means you'll be humiliated and shamed. 

Enter DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

Master, there is a bark of Epidamnum That stays but till her owner comes aboard, And then, sir, she bears away. Our fraughtage, sir, I have conveyed aboard, and I have bought The oil, the balsamum and aqua vitae. The ship is in her trim; the merry wind Blows fair from land. They stay for naught at all But for their owner, master, and yourself.

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

Master, there's a ship from Epidamnum that's just waiting until her owners comes aboard, and then, sir, she sails away. All of our stuff, sir, I've brought on board, and I've bought the oil, the juice, and the alcohol. The ship's ready to go, and the wind is blowing away from land. They're waiting only for their owner and yourself, master. 

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

How now? A madman? Why, thou peevish sheep,What ship of Epidamnum stays for me?

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

Huh? Are you a madman? You silly animal, what ship from Epidamnum is waiting for me?

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

A ship you sent me to, to hire waftage.

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

The ship you sent me to, to book our passage. 

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

Thou drunken slave, I sent thee for a ropeAnd told thee to what purpose and what end.

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

You drunken slave, I sent you for a rope and told you what I wanted to use it for and for what purpose. 

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

You sent me for a rope’s end as soon.You sent me to the bay, sir, for a bark.

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

That's as true as saying you sent me to get a beating with a rope. You sent me to the bay, sir, to find a ship. 

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

I will debate this matter at more leisure And teach your ears to list me with more heed. To Adriana, villain, hie thee straight. Give her this key, and tell her in the desk That’s cover’d o'er with Turkish tapestry There is a purse of ducats. Let her send it. Tell her I am arrested in the street, And that shall bail me. Hie thee, slave. Begone.— On, officer, to prison till it come.

ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

I'll argue you about this with you when we have more time, and I'll teach your ears to listen to me with greater care. Villain, get to Adriana, go immediately. Give her this key, and tell her that there's a bag of money in the desk that's covered with Turkish tapestry. Have her send it. Tell her I've been arrested in the street, and that the money will bail me out. Get going, slave. Move it. 

[To OFFICER] Onwards, officer, to the prison until the money arrives. 

Exeunt SECOND MERCHANT, ANGELO, OFFICER, and ANTIPHOLUS OF EPHESUS

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

To Adriana. That is where we dined,Where Dowsabel did claim me for her husband.She is too big, I hope, for me to compass.Thither I must, although against my will,For servants must their masters' minds fulfill.

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE

To Adriana? That's where we ate, where that lady said I was her husband. She's more than I can handle. I must go there, even though I'd rather not, for servants must do whatever they're commanded. 

Exit

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Dan rubins
About the Translator: Dan Rubins

Dan Rubins is currently completing his MA in Shakespeare Studies from King's College London/Shakespeare's Globe and will be pursuing an MA in Elementary Inclusive Education from Teachers College, Columbia University. He holds a BA in English from Yale University. His Masters dissertation focuses on announcements of death in early modern drama, and other research areas of interest include Shakespeare in transformative contexts (prisons, schools, etc.) and rhyme in Shakespeare's dramatic texts. In addition to teaching and learning, he also writes theatre reviews (often of Shakespeare productions), composes musical theatre (frequently with Shakespearean inspirations), and sings in choirs (occasionally in Shakespearean choral settings).