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The novel alludes to 19th-century American poet Walt Whitman in a scene in which the Lisbons' neighbors, motivated by suburban standards of politeness, attempt to express their condolences to the Lisbons following the shocking suicide of Cecilia:
Most people opted for generic cards that said “With Sympathy” or “Our Condolences,” but some of the Waspier types, accustomed to writing notes for all occasions, labored over personal responses. Mrs. Beards used a quote from Walt Whitman we took to murmuring to one another: “All goes onward and outward, nothing collapses, / and to die is different from what any one supposed, and luckier.” Chase Buell peeked at his own mother’s card as he slipped it under the Lisbons’ door. It read: “I don’t know what you’re feeling. I won’t even pretend.”
Here, Eugenides gently mocks suburban values, especially those of the "Waspier types," a phrase that refers to White, Anglo-Saxon Protestants, a demographic that has historically been associated with relative wealth and respectability in the United States. While some "opted for generic cards," others "labored over personal responses," though everyone struggles to find a way to address the difficult topics of suicide and grief. Mrs. Beards quotes Walt Whitman in her letter, drawing from Whitman's famous poem "Song of Myself." These lines in the poem suggest that death is not something to be feared, but rather, a transformation to another state of being. This allusion, then, reflects Mrs. Beards's attempt to draw helpful lessons from the canon of poetry, though the lines apply awkwardly to Cecilia's suicide, since she did not fear death, but rather, sought it out deliberately. Mrs. Buell's card, in contrast, more honestly acknowledges her inability to resolve the painful questions raised by Cecilia's death.

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Common Core-aligned