Raymond’s Run

Unlike most girls, Squeaky doesn’t have many household chores—her mother does most of them. Squeaky also doesn’t have to earn pocket money by running errands or selling Christmas cards the way George does. Squeaky’s father takes care of most everything else the family needs—all Squeaky has to do is look after her brother Raymond.

A lot of people refer to Raymond as Squeaky’s little brother because he’s “not quite right” and needs supervision, but he’s actually older and much bigger than she is. People would often mock Raymond for his “big head” when George was the one who looked after him, but Squeaky isn’t afraid to stand up for Raymond; she isn’t one to stay quiet when someone is speaking out of turn. Squeaky isn’t afraid to take risks and push people down, even if she’s a skinny little girl with a squeaky voice (which is how she got her nickname). If a confrontation gets too intense, Squeaky just runs away—she’s “the fastest thing on two feet.”

Squeaky wins first-place medals in every track competition she participates in. In private, though, Squeaky’s father races against her and effortlessly beats her, even when Squeaky gets a head start. But this is a secret, since racing against kids is embarrassing for Squeaky’s father. As far as everyone else knows, Squeaky is the fastest person in the neighborhood—certainly faster than Gretchen, who’s been bragging that she’s going to win the first-place medal this year. Squeaky thinks this is ridiculous, since Gretchen has short legs and freckles, and no one ever beats Squeaky.

One day, Squeaky sets out on a walk down Broadway while doing breath training for running. Raymond walks with her on the side closer to the buildings, since he’s prone to “fits of fantasy.” If Raymond pretends he’s a circus performer and gets his pants and shoes wet when he steps off the curb (his makeshift tightrope) into the gutter, Squeaky is the one who gets hit as punishment when they return home. Sometimes, Raymond even darts into the street to scare the pigeons, which causes a commotion and upsets the neighbors. When this happens, Squeaky always has to apologize on his behalf. But Squeaky doesn’t mind looking after Raymond while he makes believe, as long as he doesn’t interrupt her breathing practice.

Squeaky is unashamed of training in public, even though this embarrasses her mother. Squeaky’s classmate Cynthia Procter, on the other hand, likes to let on that she doesn’t need to prepare for things like tests or the school spelling bee. But Squeaky knows better: Cynthia also pretends to be naturally gifted at the piano, but whenever Squeaky passes by Cynthia’s house, she hears her practicing scales. Squeaky resents this, since she herself studies hard and is unabashedly serious about running. Presently, as Squeaky does her exercises, Raymond keeps pace with her because people will harass him if they see him hanging around.

As Squeaky does her breathing exercises, she spots Gretchen and her sidekicks Mary Louise and Rosie walking up the street. Squeaky used to be friends with Mary Louise when Mary Louise was new in Harlem, defending her from bullies, but now Mary Louise talks bad about Squeaky. Rosie is mean to Raymond, although Squeaky doesn’t think Rosie has room to talk since she’s fat and unintelligent. Squeaky considers going into the candy store to avoid the girls, but she decides that would be cowardly—she has “a reputation to consider.” Squeaky is ready for a fight.

As the girls approach, Mary Louise and Rosie taunt Squeaky about losing the upcoming May Day race, but Squeaky knows that they’re just parroting what Gretchen told them to say. As Gretchen smiles disingenuously, Squeaky thinks that “girls never really smile at each other” because adult women don’t either, so there’s no one to teach them how. Mary Louise and Rosie begin to bully Raymond, but Squeaky is quick to tell them off. Gretchen tries to look tough but has nothing to say back, so she and her sidekicks walk away. Raymond and Squeaky exchange a smile and carry on down the street.

On May Day, Squeaky is in no rush to get to the park since the track meet is the last event of the day. The main attraction of the celebration is the May Pole dance, which Squeaky’s mother wishes she would participate in. But Squeaky is adamant that she doesn’t want to wear fancy clothes and dance around pretending to be a fairy—she’s more interested in being herself, a “poor Black girl” who can’t really afford new clothes. Squeaky remembers playing a dancing strawberry in a nursery school production of Hansel and Gretel, feeling foolish just so that her mother and father could watch proudly. But Squeaky isn’t a dancer—she’s a runner.

When Squeaky arrives late to the May Day program, she puts Raymond in a swing and looks around for her teacher Mr. Pearson, who pins the race numbers on. Truthfully, Squeaky is really looking for Gretchen, though she doesn’t see her anywhere in the crowded park. Eventually, Mr. Pearson fumbles over, clumsily dropping things as he towers over the crowd on stilts. Mr. Pearson greets Squeaky by her nickname, which she resents because she’s not allowed to call him Beanstalk (his nickname among Squeaky and her classmates) to his face—so she corrects him that her name is Hazel Elizabeth Deborah Parker.

Mr. Pearson hints that Squeaky should purposely lose the race this year—it would be a nice gesture to let Gretchen win, since she’s new to the neighborhood. Squeaky just gives him a dark look and stomps away after pinning on her lucky number, seven. She thinks that adults can have a lot of nerve. Squeaky goes to lie down in the grass next to the track, imagining that she’s back in the country instead of the “concrete jungle” of the city. After the younger age groups run the 20-, 30-, and 40-yard dashes, Squeaky and Gretchen take their places at the starting line for the 50-yard dash. Squeaky sees Raymond on the other side of the fence, mimicking the runners’ crouched positions, but Squeaky doesn’t have the energy to yell at him to cut it out.

Whenever Squeaky is about to run a race, she feels like she’s in a fever dream, flying weightlessly over a beach. In the dream, she smells apples like the ones in the orchard near where she used to live in the countryside. She feels herself getting lighter and lighter until she crouches over the starting line and snaps out of the dream. Feeling solid again, she encourages herself that she has to win because there’s no one faster than her—she could even beat her father if she really tried.

The gun goes off, and Squeaky flies past everyone else and tunes out the world around her. She sees Gretchen to her right and Raymond keeping pace with them on the other side of the fence, running in his own style with his arms at his sides and his hands behind him. Squeaky, awestruck, has never seen this before; she almost stops and watches Raymond on his very first run. But she stays focused on the finish line and wins the race, garnering congratulatory pats on the back from everyone on the sidelines.

Then, just as the race announcer says “In first place,” the loudspeaker cuts out. Squeaky sees that Gretchen overshot the finish line, too, and is now walking back while breathing steadily like a professional would. Seeing this, Squeaky thinks that she actually likes Gretchen a little. Beanstalk argues with the announcer and a few other men about the times on the stopwatches while Squeaky and Gretchen look at each other, wondering who actually won.

Just then, Raymond rattles the fence to get Squeaky’s attention, eventually climbing over it in a graceful way that makes Squeaky think of how Raymond looked while he was running. She thinks that Raymond would actually make a good runner—he always keeps up with Squeaky when she practices and even mimics her breathing exercises. Squeaky thinks that it doesn’t matter if she’s won or lost against Gretchen, since she could always retire as a runner and coach Raymond instead. She could even beat Cynthia in the spelling bee if she studied hard enough, or she could become a star on the piano if she could convince her mother to get her lessons. Squeaky’s room is full of ribbons, medals, and awards—she wonders what Raymond has of his own.

Squeaky laughs aloud with joy at all of her plans, jumping up and down with excitement as Raymond scales the fence and runs over to her. She thinks that Raymond will be an excellent runner, just like Squeaky and their father. Everyone else thinks that Squeaky is excited because the judges have just announced the final results of the race: Hazel Elizabeth Deborah Parker in first place, Gretchen P. Lewis in second. Squeaky looks over at Gretchen and smiles, thinking that Gretchen is a good runner and that she could even help Squeaky coach Raymond. Gretchen nods to congratulate Squeaky and smiles back—as real of a smile as a girl can manage, Squeaky thinks, given that girls don’t usually practice “real smiling.” She thinks that maybe girls are preoccupied with being fairies or strawberries instead of being “something honest and worthy of respect […] like being people.”