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Joar’s Old Man
Joar’s mom is a kind woman who is good at nurturing things, including plants. She and Joar bond over nursing an injured bird back to health. But her husband, Joar’s old man, is abusive and drinks to excess, sometimes causing serious injury to Joar and Joar’s mom. Joar acquires a knife to kill his old man, but his mom secretly steals it, prepared to use it herself until an accident disables Joar’s old man.
Joar’s Mom Quotes in My Friends
The My Friends quotes below are all either spoken by Joar’s Mom or refer to Joar’s Mom. For each quote, you can also see the other characters and themes related to it (each theme is indicated by its own dot and icon, like this one:
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Chapter 14 Quotes
When Joar got home that evening, his old man almost beat him to death, and if it hadn’t been so unbearably cruel, it would have been almost ironic, beating a child because he had been fighting at school. His old man came down on him like an avalanche, and it wasn’t even to teach him a lesson. He just did it because when the principal called him, he had had to sit there and pretend to be a proper parent, a real dad. It had reminded that bastard of what he really was: nothing. That was why he beat the boy extra hard.
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Chapter 16 Quotes
“Yes, she really was remarkable at growing things, everything smelled so good around her. She managed to help everything… survive.”
His mouth drowns in wrinkles at the end of the sentence.
“You must all have liked her very much if her flowers were included in the painting,” Louisa declares.
Ted cleans his crooked glasses to give himself a chance to blink more slowly.
“Yes. Everyone loved her.”
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Chapter 46 Quotes
Joar had sold many bicycles in his life, but that day was the first time he had sold his own. And that was the money they used to buy the canvas and paint that would change the world.
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Chapter 51 Quotes
In a voice so fragile that Louisa has to lean across the table to hear, Joar explains that he had prepared a small box. He was going to pretend he’d found another bird, and look extra happy so his old man would hate him more than ever. He would leave the knife under the flowers outside the window again, then he would wait until his old man stumbled into his room, and when the bastard grabbed the box Joar would reach through the window for the knife and stab his old man before he had time to react. It was a good plan. It would have worked if he had gotten the chance.
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Chapter 53 Quotes
“You took care of him? Despite everything he had done to you?”
“He became a different man. It’s hard to explain. He could hardly talk, he needed help eating, washing, going to the bathroom… but that isn’t what made the difference. The real difference was in his eyes. There was no hatred in them anymore. Hell, in the end even I didn’t hate him anymore. In those last years I called him ‘Dad’ when I fed him. I’d never called him that in my entire life.”
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Joar’s Mom Character Timeline in My Friends
The timeline below shows where the character Joar’s Mom appears in My Friends. The colored dots and icons indicate which themes are associated with that appearance.
Chapter 16
...The One of the Sea and asks about them. Ted says they were inspired by Joar’s mom ’s garden. She was good at growing things and helping them survive—the problem was that...
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Chapter 39
...to keep painkillers in. Joar decides to take the bird home in the box, saying Joar’s mom will know how to save it. Everyone else knows this is a bad idea but...
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Chapter 41
Twenty-five years ago, after rescuing the injured bird, Joar learns that Joar’s mom does not actually know how to save it. He still has faith in her, based...
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Joar’s mom always treated him as older than he was, sneaking him into R-rated movies and teaching...
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Chapter 44
...Ted that his old man came home drunk just in time to hear Joar and Joar’s mom laughing about the injured bird in the box. At first, nothing happened, and his old...
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Joar doesn’t tell Ted everything that happened after that, but he mentions that Joar’s mom came into the room and tried to pull his old man away while the old...
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...with Joar coming over every day to feed it. Along with Ali, the artist, and Joar’s mom , they have a ceremony to free the bird. The bird stays in the artist’s...
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Chapter 45
...to Joar’s knife. Ted says Joar was planning to use it at some point when Joar’s mom wasn’t home. Part of Louisa regrets asking and wishes things could have ended with the...
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Chapter 46
...comes. A worried Ali goes over to Joar’s house and sees his old man and Joar’s mom leaving for work. Joar’s mom looks happy, but it’s the last time any of Joar’s...
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...away but instead just bump into each other. As it turns out, Joar had money. Joar’s mom surprised Joar that morning by showing him a storage compartment where she had bought him...
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Chapter 51
Twenty-five years ago, Joar looks in his backpack outside the museum and panics knowing that Joar’s mom must be the one who took his knife out. He rushes home driving at full...
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Joar’s mom was supposed to be working the night shift that night. Joar’s plan was to goad...
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As it turns out, the police actually came to the house to tell Joar’s mom that Joar’s old man was in the hospital, on the verge of death. He had...
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Chapter 52
...extensive brain damage and will never be the same person, being paralyzed and barely verbal. Joar’s mom will stay with his old man, Joar knows, because he needs her. Still, he can...
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Chapter 53
...man’s life, Joar even started calling him “Dad.” Still, Joar mostly stayed around to help Joar’s mom , who struggled to manage a house and care for her disabled husband at the...
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