Themes
Key
LitCharts assigns a color and icon to each theme in The End of the Affair, which you can use to track the themes throughout the work.
Love and Hatred
Faith, Acceptance, and the Divine
Jealousy and Passion
Adultery, Deception, and Honesty
Summary
Analysis
Bendrix asserts that it is easier to convey unhappiness than happiness. According to Bendrix, in happiness we lose our identity and are destroyed. Unhappiness, however, is individual and personal. Bendrix also writes about how the “act of love” is sometimes called a “little death” that sometimes brings with it “the little peace.” However, Bendrix says it is strange to write about these things because it makes it seem like he “love[s] what in fact [he] hate[s].” This discrepancy makes it difficult for him to understand what, exactly, he’s thinking.
For Bendrix, unhappiness is so much more personal than happiness because unhappiness is something he is able to both internalize and externalize—he can make other people as unhappy as he feels, as seen in his treatment of Sarah. Happiness, however, is more difficult to share with others, especially because Bendrix’s jealousy frequently drives him to destroy his own happiness rather than let it exist long enough for someone else to destroy it. Similarly, it is easier for Bendrix to talk about and share his hate than it is for him to talk about and share love.
Themes
The “peace” Bendrix describes is something he experienced in the early days of the war. Even still, it was a period “punctuated by misunderstanding and suspicion.” At times, Bendrix describes feeling certain that there were lots of other men in Sarah’s life, and that while he was “arrogant” in the “act of love,” once alone, he was full of uncertainty.
Bendrix find his confidence during the “act of love” (sex) because those are the moments when he is in complete possession of Sarah’s body. Once her body is no longer under his control, he falls prey to his jealousy and insecurity, believing that she is giving her body to other men, too.
Themes
One morning Sarah called Bendrix and told him that Henry was sick at home, thus preventing her from leaving. However, Sarah invited Bendrix over to her house, saying they could tell Henry that they’re discussing a movie and having sandwiches. This made Bendrix think to himself, “how many times before has she planned in just this way?”
Bendrix fears that Sarah has “planned in just this way” numerous times, which would reinforce his fear that he is only one of her lovers. It would mean that, ultimately, he is not that important. That would mean that Sarah lies when she tells him that she loves him, which he accuses her of many times.
Themes
Bendrix went over to Sarah’s house and they had sex on the floor of the room below Henry’s. After Sarah reached orgasm, Bendrix worried that Henry heard her. However, Sarah told him that Henry wouldn’t recognize the noise because he’s never brought her to climax before. Shortly after that, Henry peeked in the door to say hello before going back to his bed. Bendrix asked Sarah, “Do you mind?” In reply, Sarah silently shook her head. Bendrix reflects on how characteristic this was of Sarah, who had “a wonderful way of eliminating remorse.” Because of this, Bendrix says one “could have called her a born Catholic,” even though she, like Bendrix, did not believe in God.
Sarah’s willingness to take such huge risks (having sex on the floor immediately below the room her husband is in) is further proof of how secure she has become in her adulteries—she is not only certain that Henry won’t see or hear them, but she doesn’t care because she feels no remorse for what she’s doing. Sarah uses the fact that Henry can’t bring her to climax to justify her adulteries—it seems logical to her that what she can’t get from her husband (and what he seems entirely indifferent to himself), she should be allowed to get elsewhere.
Themes
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Addressing the reader, Bendrix writes that if his story seem meandering, it’s because he’s “lost in a strange region.” Bendrix notes that on the afternoon he just described, he trusted Sarah completely. Sarah told him that she’d “never loved anybody or anything” the way she loved him and, according to Bendrix, it was an act of self-surrender on her part as undeniable as when they made love.
Bendrix is able to trust Sarah this time because she gave him this assurance without any hope of getting something in return. It wasn’t like having sex, during which she expected to be brought to climax; and it wasn’t like giving a little in order to get expensive presents or attention. She told Bendrix she loved him simply because she did, and Bendrix (who had not yet become bitter and angry) was able to believe it.
Themes
Reflecting on this, Bendrix says that Sarah didn’t lie about her love for him because she lived from moment to moment. Bendrix, however, is unable to live the same way, and thus found himself haunted by all the men Sarah had said those same words to in the past. In fact, Bendrix says that even “in the moment of love,” he found himself “gathering evidence of a crime that hadn’t yet been committed.” Bendrix says that all the evidence he had gathered during their relationship came rushing back into his mind when he received a letter from Mr. Parkis.
Bendrix’s statement that he was always “collecting evidence” that would prove Sarah’s infidelity is reflected in his earlier statements about how he came to realize that Sarah was really good at conducting an affair: knowing that he shouldn’t call her, knowing about the squeaky step, etc. This proves that from the earliest days of their relationship, when they should have been happiest, Bendrix was looking for reasons to be unhappy.
Themes
