Reckoning

With Barb and Chris busy, Magda looked to The Brady Bunch for perspective on her life. The Bradys had ordinary names and no father with cancer, and survived all moral challenges. Magda also looked to the moon for comfort. She watched shows about space exploration; in 1969, she cried when she watched Neil Armstrong land on the moon. Magda felt that if the moon was reachable then anything was possible.

Magda hated dolls, and was, in all respects, a tomboy. Margaret was uneasy with Magda wanting boys’ toys and clothes. Magda knew she liked girls, but she used images from TV to “normalize” herself; inside, she wanted to kiss Marcia Brady, but tried to make herself look and act like Marcia Brady instead.

Peter loved movies; he could scarcely believe it when his daughter starred alongside Mickey Rooney in Babe: Pig in the City (Magda Szubanski is a film star and comedian). Peter also loved war movies, but he criticized how unbelievable they were. The only actor Peter respected was Audie Murphy, a veteran.

Once, when a Holocaust documentary came on the TV, Peter pointed out the street where his family had lived. Magda then realized that the pleading Jewish children and piles of bodies were not actors—they were real people. Struggling to reconcile the Hollywood war movies with her father’s real past, Magda looked to Peter; she was shocked by his lack of emotion. Sensing Magda’s fear at seeing the distressing images on the screen, Peter looked back at Magda with contempt. Feeling that a chasm lay between her and her father, Magda vowed never to show fear again. During a game of baseball the next day at recess, Magda swung the bat for the Jews, cursing the Nazis, and hit a homerun.