In two excerpts from her childhood journal, Gifty tells God that Nana told her Christianity was a cult that started before people knew what cults were. And she asks God if he would show her if he’s real.
Nana’s break with his faith brought up Gifty’s earliest questions about her own beliefs, as evidenced by this journal entry. Child Gifty is evidently torn between following her brother’s beliefs and seeking answers from the God she still believes in. Again, she repeatedly claims to feel no continuity between her adult, scientific, non-believing self and her childhood, faithful, dogmatic self. Yet, her journal entries show that she started asking questions about her faith long before she felt she lost it.