Themes
Key
LitCharts assigns a color and icon to each theme in To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before, which you can use to track the themes throughout the work.
Family, Responsibility, and Growing Up
Love and Fear
Social Structure, Reputation, and High School
Lies vs. Honesty
Summary
Analysis
Lara Jean would love to crawl into a hole and stay there. She still remembers that day in John Ambrose McClaren’s basement. It was one of her first boy-girl hangouts, and Lara Jean was wearing a strapless bra for the first time. It felt different, and the girls were all prepared for kissing with lip gloss. But the boys just played video games until parents started to arrive. When Lara Jean and Peter were the last kids downstairs, Peter said her hair smelled good and then kissed her. After that, Peter was all Lara Jean could think about.
Lara Jean makes it clear that this hangout was anticlimactic for most of her friends. Growing up and achieving milestones (like first kisses) may seem exciting before they happen—but as Lara Jean and her friends discovered here, these milestones might not be all they’re cracked up to be.
Themes
Lara Jean realizes that she has to find her hatbox—what if her other letters to John Ambrose McClaren, Kenny from camp, Lucas Krapf, and Josh were sent too? Lara Jean tells her gym teacher, Coach White, that she threw up, and he excuses her. She runs the entire way home and starts tearing her bedroom apart. The hatbox is missing. Josh texts and asks if Lara Jean needs a ride home, so Lara Jean turns her phone off.
Realizing that the hatbox is missing implies that Lara Jean’s problem is bigger than just Peter getting his letter—she may have many more disgruntled and confused boys to deal with. Turning her phone off and ignoring Josh speaks to Lara Jean’s emotional immaturity—she’s unable to think rationally and face her problems head-on in the moment.
Themes
The only thing Lara Jean can think of to do is call Margot. Margot picks up, but she clearly just woke up. She can tell something is wrong, but Lara Jean hesitates. She decides not to burden Margot with this—that’s what Margot would do. Lara Jean tells Margot to go back to sleep. She hangs up and makes herself an ice cream sundae to eat in bed.
Having her letters sent out represents a loss of control for Lara Jean. So, it seems like the only thing to do is to ask for help from the one person Lara Jean trusts completely: Margot. However, Lara Jean also recognizes that Margot is growing up and moving on, so in this situation, she decides it’s better to try to deal with things herself.
Themes
