Themes
Key
LitCharts assigns a color and icon to each theme in To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before, which you can use to track the themes throughout the work.
Family, Responsibility, and Growing Up
Love and Fear
Social Structure, Reputation, and High School
Lies vs. Honesty
Summary
Analysis
Lara Jean goes to her first football game that Friday with Peter and his friends. She’s exhausted by 9:30. Suddenly, Peter throws an arm around her. Lara Jean notices Genevieve cheering with the cheerleaders, giving Peter a look. Once the game is finally over, Peter invites Lara Jean to come to a party with him. She refuses. But when Peter passes a diner on his way to take Lara Jean home, she agrees to get food with him. When Lara Jean used to come to the diner with Margot and Josh, they always sat in the back by the jukebox and got specific dishes every time. It feels odd when Peter insists on sitting up at the front.
Dating Peter is opening Lara Jean up to a whole new social world, one where people go to sporting events on Fridays rather than organizing their shoes. Navigating all these changes is exhausting for Lara Jean. And it becomes even more difficult when they go to the same diner where Lara Jean used to go with Margot and Josh, because even this feels different than it used to. Lara Jean can’t escape that her social life is changing.
Themes
The waitress knows Lara Jean and asks where Margot and Josh are. Peter rolls his eyes. Once the waitress is gone, Lara Jean asks why Peter hates Josh. Peter insists he doesn’t hate Josh, but Josh did tell on him for cheating in seventh grade. Lara Jean’s stomach twists, especially when she sees that Peter doesn’t feel bad for cheating. She tries to tease him, but her attempt falls flat. Peter suggests that Lara Jean stop judging people, and then their food comes.
The fact that the waitress recognizes Lara Jean and asks after Margot and Josh shows just how often the three of them were at this café, which helps explain why Lara Jean feels so unsettled about being here with Peter—this is totally new territory for her. Meanwhile, Peter starts to seem less desirable to Lara Jean when he admits he cheated once. This could perhaps be read as hypocritical, though, since Lara Jean herself is dishonest with the people she’s closest to.
Themes
As they eat, Peter asks who else got letters. Lara Jean lists the boys: Peter, Josh, a boy from camp named Kenny, Lucas Krapf (whom Peter insists is gay), and John Ambrose McClaren. Peter is incredulous about John Ambrose, who moved away after eighth grade. Lara Jean hasn’t heard from him, and she’s a little sad—he’s the most important boy she’s loved, since he’s so sweet. Lara Jean wonders aloud where John ended up, and Peter tries to tease her, but then pulls out his phone to call John Ambrose. Lara Jean tells him not to and then copies John Ambrose’s number into her own phone; she’ll call when she’s ready. Later, that night, she pictures what it would be like to date John Ambrose.
Given the way that Lara Jean talks about John Ambrose, it seems like the letters didn’t work the way she expected them to. It seems like she still has feelings for him or could again with very little prompting. So the letters, in this case, might help Lara Jean feel more in control of her emotions and keep her from having to do the frightening work of being in a relationship with someone. But when push comes to shove, they don’t work—and she still has to figure out how she feels about these boys.
Themes
