Themes
Key
LitCharts assigns a color and icon to each theme in To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before, which you can use to track the themes throughout the work.
Family, Responsibility, and Growing Up
Love and Fear
Social Structure, Reputation, and High School
Lies vs. Honesty
Summary
Analysis
Since Mrs. Kavinsky always seems “fancy,” Lara Jean dresses up and puts mascara and lip gloss on for dinner with Peter’s family. Oddly enough, Mrs. Kavinsky made pizza, and the house isn’t too fancy. She’s very nice. Peter’s 12-year-old brother, Owen, is quieter than Peter, and much less polite. Over dinner, when Mrs. Kavinsky mentions that Mommy must love having three girls, Peter reminds her that Mommy passed away. Owen and Lara Jean banter and then, out of the blue, Owen notes that Lara Jean wears more makeup than Genevieve did. Lara Jean shrinks; Genevieve wears a full face of makeup every day, and Owen must be messing with her.
Meeting Mrs. Kavinsky in her own home is another lesson for Lara Jean in not judging people before she gets to know them. Mrs. Kavinsky ends up being perfectly normal, not overly fancy like Lara Jean expected. Owen similarly judges Lara Jean for wearing makeup, and the way this embarrasses Lara Jean shows how making assumptions about people can be hurtful.
Themes
Later, as Peter is driving Lara Jean home, Lara Jean confirms that Peter’s parents are divorced and asks how often he sees his dad. Peter says he doesn’t see him often, but he doesn’t really miss him. Rather, he misses how his dad took care of things. Now, his dad is doing that for his new family. Lara Jean says she misses Mommy, especially the way that Mommy used to wash Lara Jean’s hair. She often wonders if Mommy would even recognize her if she saw Lara Jean now. A few minutes later, when Lara Jean gets out of the car at her house, Peter says that Mrs. Kavinsky liked her.
Both Lara Jean and Peter miss and crave their parents’ love and care. To some degree, they both still want to be young kids, with parents who will take care of everything for them. Their nostalgic tone makes it seem like missing their parents is making it a bit harder for them to accept that they’re growing up, as they lost that care and love before they were ready for it to disappear.
Themes
This is exactly what Lara Jean wants to hear, since she wants to impress other people’s mothers. She used to love going over to Genevieve’s house because Genevieve’s mom was stylish and gorgeous. Peter interrupts Lara Jean’s thoughts by saying she definitely doesn’t wear more makeup than Genevieve; her makeup always stained his clothes. Lara Jean muses that Genevieve seems to always be around in some form.
It’s possible that Lara Jean wants to impress other people’s mothers because then those mothers might be more willing to comfort her and fill Mommy’s role to an extent. What Peter has to say about Meanwhile, Genevieve seems to be looming over Peter and Lara Jean’s relationship, in part because the main point of the relationship is to annoy her.
Themes
